JohnnyFartPants

Although the song touched me and made me feel sad it never made me want to get on my knees and suck on a sweaty penis before inviting a man to bend me over and do me up the gary glitter, not that there is anything wrong in gayers.

INS, in the greatest ever bending of words, fitting a battery is not fixing a car any more than topping up the washer bottle is!!

Tonight - Drinks and a meal with the girlfriend Saturday - Bit of decorating, watch England and Wales play their rugby matches Sunday - Cook a roast dinner, have a w@nk.

I saw that too, and until then I had never really even let the second verse of the song enter my head. I just thought, "Oh, it's that beardy bloke singing a silly song", but then I decided to listen to it. I must admit I had had a bottle of wine and I googled it on my phone and listened to a different version sung by Sinead O'Conner and it really did make the hairs on my neck stand up. (I got a watery eye too!) http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=kDx8U9Qhku0

Silly song sung by Rolf Harris or quite touching if you listen to the lyrics all the way through?

Best baldness chick ever was Skinhead O'Conner. In fact nothing compares to her.

I am 42 and still **** directly before I go to bed which sees me through the night. I get up around 7.30am. If I have consumed vast amounts of beer I may have one around 5am. On one occasion I drank a 3 ltr bottle of scrumpy, then two bottles of red wine and found the leather settee was very shiny in the morning and my clothes were wet.

Brilliant as usual.

It would "bring her on" that is for sure. Seriously, going back to a previous thread, how much would you want to **** it?

The scary thing is that she exists and not that she may be with that bloke. Surely she can alter her appearance a little and make an effort.

Why have you answered in that order when quite clearly the photo's are the other way around?

Isn't that a internet nerdy kiss thing when what you might have meant is "moi"?

Do you think she owes him a go in her stench trench for being so underhand?

One way to think of things TDD is to ask yourself if you would send a text to a bird at 10.30pm at night, if you didn't know the birds fella. You probably would if you were single to be fair. So that is all she has done, been on the receiving end of a male friends text. It was also sent at a time when a few beers could have made him think, "I might be in here." She may well have no motive other than thinking he is a mate while he may well want to rub her **** until she gets all gooey in the front bottom and then push his portion up right up her. It happens.

Was there a nurse syringing out your ears at the time? I suspect not as it isn't something to forget to mention, although it happened to me when I stood up directly after that. Well, actually I didn't quite fall over, I just did a Trevor Berbick impression once he received a smack to the side of his head in the first round by Mike Tyson. http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=_MY3RtJUrD8

I tried wearing a pitta bread around my knob in a kebab shop the same day that Gazza scored that wonder goal against Scotland and was asked to leave immediately.

Have you ever noticed this about women. When they describe a situation of a shop assistant or similar giving them bad service they elect to talk in a voice or rather tone, of the person. It is nearly always mega over the top and no man on the planet has ever heard anyone come across so snotty or rude ever.

In your mind, can't you rewind her to "casual ****" and sort of decide other stuff later?

But, that you thought it needed explaining......................

My only advice is to say that you have to go with your feelings. That said, always remember that women are far greater liars than men. They can spin them without so much as a shady look on their faces and most won't think twice about doing it.

He wasn't climbing at all. He jumped with his arms out wide, not holding on to the player at all. On coming down he was leaning into the player but **** my old boots, it is still a contact sport isn't it?

Someday soon there will be a member of public that manages to get to a piece of scum like these and ends their lives, and the authorities will see an uproar when the public get behind and back the person for doing it.

The changing of trainer is surely a positive one as he was treading water with the last one for a few fights. I don't think he is talking as if he is going to lose, only that he is soon to call a halt to his career. I expect him to go out and win.

I have just found myself reading through, nay, wading through so much total crap from AwaySaint1. Did he ever have a point? I will never get that time back and would like to know from the legal experts among us whether I have a right to sue him for this?

Is it also the case that Shane is the older?