DT

Ah yes, the master plan. Playing a striker 'not to score goals'. 'So, Shane, what I want you to do is go on, run around a lot, but do not score goals' 'Sorry boss?' 'Do not score goals' 'Oh. Right.' You're right. I don't get it.

Jermain Defoe's gone to Sunderland. Drat. i would have like him at Saints, despite his previous at Spurs (the worst club in the world). he would have scored the league goals that Long doesn't.

brilliant beard though

I've posted on this before and it worries me a lot. Could be very expensive oversight if we don't get a good back-up in and we are forced to play Davis. That would mean a run of lost points, in my opinion. Mind you, in the meantime, we could give Fraser a few lessons in kicking. His is awful.

I thought he was quite good. Man Utd keen apparently.

Take a bus and park it. Then nick a winner. We're now the masters of a 1-0 away smash and grab

Cork, surely?

How bad is Forster's kicking?

We must sign a backup keeper. We're one injury away from real problems in that department. For Kelvin read panic and the difference between CLeague and nout

To be honest, I've been amazed for the last three seasons that Wenger wasn't more eager to sign him. I think he'd be a good fit there. Sad to lose him but feels like our time is up and we can max out the income. Would absolutely hate it if he chose Spurs.

It is laughably corrupt. I could hardly believe my eyes when Fergie's board flashed up 5 minutes. From what? Cheaters never prosper, though. Actually, they do. They almost always get a goal backing Fergie time. PS anyone else incensed by moronic questions by Sky's reporter about shin pads? And indeed about whether Van Gaal could have done better on the goal? Duh. Yes. They could have prevented it. On the upside, Gary Neville proved he's a fair pundit, apart from salivating about how Morgan could play for any of the big clubs.... (clue: look at the table)

Alan Boolloocckks (Alan Ball's real name)

Roberto Martinez joint 7th favourite for the job. Good one.

Messi's continued 'stomach bugs' missing him games apparently subtext for wanting end of manager. Will happen. Then we can worry. Think Koeman would not be able to pass it up.

Jermain Defoe. Would get sackloads of goals.

I very much hope this is not true.

Also seems to - annoyingly - love playing against us!

Him and Hazard will secure the championship

Have to say, watching it again, what a pass from Fabregas for their goal. Some player.

Well done saints. Like the charge of the light brigade at times

Fonte had to keep possession

Not that one. Would have been harsh pen

Ref gives us decision shock

Cheating git

Tadic' delivery is very poor