DT

Sounds like something out of Goodfellas or the Sopranos to me. Very sinister. We should pay the compensation. Then again, we could always spend it on getting in a good out of work Irish manager...

i pwomise

I'd prefer Pipkins to Adkins

v underwhelming

we are imploding

You're bard

Borrow Burley's gel instead.

DATS da fella who's tuppin yer missus, mr fontee, dat fella dare! y'see im? der one wiv de grey herr, to be surre? pahjew. now den. can i be havin his job now mr cortissier? can oi? it'll be good craic. and we'll be winnin de league in no toime.

please be true, please be true

is he wet?

It's because he wanted to bring in SuBo on a short-term loan and play her at central defence.

It's because Pardew is actually a LADIEEEEEE

Yeah, that one was accurate

If so, Billy Davies, finally, please. No nonsense promotion.

AHA! So it is a man then? We have something to go on! Hooray!

in that layby

are we actually ever going to buy anyone/get a manager? You would have thought we had no money...

I think Tony Hart would do a better job than Paul Hart.

If it's Paul Hart I think we should form a queue on the Itchen Bridge.

are we getting a manager who's pasta his best?

Er..he wasn't terrible, and they are in the Premier. Bit different?

To be honest, I think Zola could be very good. Can't believe we'd turn our noses up at him.

Billy Davies?

to be honest, I think it's a relief to us all...

the same newspaper's lead story today: CARLISLE TO NEWCASTLE BUS TIMETABLE CHANGES