Whitey Grandad

I'll have a Blackpool please, Bob.

Never believe a rumour until it's denied.

Related, but not quite the same... We once had a Danish customer whose first name was Bent. Bent liked to wear a black leather jacket and one evening we were all in a pub in Romsey when by business partner John went up to the bar to someone who was wearing a black leather jacket and tapped him on the shoulder. When he turned round John said "Oh I'm sorry, I thought you were Bent".

As in 'bath'?

But could he spell?

I overate?

I often like to look at things from another direction.

Do you have that problem too, Scotty?

Wouldn't that be 'constructive dismissal'?

Try replacing the £ with metre and p with cm and then imagine it with little square tiles each 1cm x 1cm. So 100p = (10p)2 which would be the same as saying that 100 tiles in a row can be arranged into a square 10 tiles by 10 tiles, but this does not equal 0.1m2 which would need 1000 tiles. The difference is between (0.1)2m and (0.1m)2

Let's just say that they didn't try very hard.

This step is wrong. There are 100 p in a £ so to go from p2 to £2 you need to convert by 1002

You're mixing pence and pounds and once you square £0.1 you are in a different dimension which requires a correction factor of 100 to get back to the one in which we live.

Yes, different units. You can square a number but pence and pounds are different dimensions.

Fractions to decimals you can normally divide in your head for most cases. For more complicated long multiplications I just use the traditional method of putting the larger number over the smaller and multiplying the top by each digit from the lower row in succession. Then you add the number of decimal places in the two multiplicands and stick the decimal point in the answer that number of places from the right. It's amazing what calculations you can do in your head with a little practice but for exam purposes you usually have to show your working.

Thanks for the update. What was the answer for number 1?

2) is three and a half times three and a quarter, so: three and a half is 7/2 three and a quarter is 13/4 multiply the two gives 91/8 which is 11 and three eighths which is 11.375 (square metres) It's difficult to write fractions so I have used words. You can easily do this calculation in your head.

F*** me, we were good. Thanks for that.

That's about how I feel. When I first saw the look in the mother's eyes it wasn't distraught or despair, it was resignation, almost as though she knew that her daughter was gone and not coming back. Just a feeling, nothing more.

It's not the same now that the fit bird's gone. Not that I ever watch it, of course, far beneath me.

More likely to be the idiotic decision to move the Council Offices back into the Town Centre.

Fit and Proper Tested Person?

Didn't we have a waterlogged one, or is my memory playing up?

Of course, Pap, I have done my little bit this morning. It's just as well that we live in different constituencies or your vote and mine might cancel each other out.

Yes, that's the heart of the matter. My thoughts go to the poor little girl. It was no more than a feeling, and I can usually read people's behaviour, but my reaction at the time was 'they know more than they are letting on'.