Crab Lungs

Unfortunately I did not witness this, although I did at a later stage witness a Makin/Bennett centre half "dream-team" which was as close to a footballing nightmare as I've ever been...

Southampton, as a city, is ****, full stop. No if, but's or maybe's - its' ****. The people are **** too. Mostly pretentious or yobbish, you are almost guaranteed to see a couple of fights if you go out on a Friday or Saturday night. The crowning dollop of semen on the stodgy ****-cake that is Southampton is the SCC. Anyone who has worked for them will know this...

Roman Pavlyuchenko. Aside from the rest of the squirty, unpolished turds on display v Villa tonight, I don't think I've seen such an inept performance as Pavlyuchenko's this evening (although Corluka run him pretty close...) £13.4m, or roughly a third of Berbatov has been spent on this ruskie clogger who displayed an absolutely shocking ineptitude for football as I've ever seen in recent seasons. Christ, I'd rather have had Vladimir Putin upfront than him. Can't pass, can't shoot, can't head, can't run... I would say I feel sorry for Spurs, but I don't. I hope Martin Jol is pouring himself a nice german red as I type this... (apart from the above, has anyone else seen such a pathetic as debut as this...?)

And Kevin Gibb... Oh.

Fish? Poooey. Japanese women? AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH!

Ahhhhhhyeeeeahhhh

"Honey, I shrunk the kids"

Looks like Jamie White might have ********ed up all four of my accumulators. Arse-candle.

Right, it's been nice chaating but I samose I better have a baath now... not long until the game.

Obviously couldn't be bothered to read through the thread as there was no Japanese women on it, but I'm assuming Mr Bates is alluding to the time shifting thingymejig in Switzerland???

Japanese. Women. Please.

Oh behave, kippy - you have a fine stride and an equally fine posture. Be happy.

If he's up for it, why should he miss out?

Oh, I still would.

Get back in your sub, you.

We do street things together and he makes me happy.

I'm taking my kids down there right away to see if we can get a glimpse of the man himself. On second thoughts, I'll stay at home and just send the kids instead.

Ooooooh more pics, love it. I'm sooooooooooooo going to get it when I go to Tokyo, even if I only know the universal asiatic phrase of "herrrerrro"

I'd be interested to see his response if we're still playing terrific football and the fanbase majority has swayed...

Skates, SMS, live on national TV and a full house. We'll do those c*nts right now.

very critical of Jan and is appointment. Spent hours dredging up unsolicited facts on JP and posting them on here, "outing" JP as an amateur. It's early days, but Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

lmfao

Where's Chumpy Pahars these days? Any ideas?

Jimmy Case is a dribbler who often struggles to string a sentence together. Ignore.