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People you'd like to punch


SuperMikey
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If you had the opportunity to land a right hook squarely in the jaw or other body part of any 5 people in the world, living or dead, who would they be? My top 5 is easily:

 

1. Piers Morgan - Because he's just a cvnt of the highest order

2. Dappy from N-Dubz - See above.

3. Michael McIntyre - Whilst wearing a pair of brass knuckles so I snap his ****ing head off for being the unfunniest person in the entire world. I'd rather eat ice cream off Jim Davidson's balls than be subjected to his stand-up 'comedy'.

4. The Go Compare opera singer - So he would shut his ****ing mouth for once!

5. Mike Tyson - Just so I can say that I punched Mike Tyson. Probably a few free drinks in that story right there.

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AS much as I can't condone violence...5 who deserve a good slap are...

 

John Terry (what a best mate he is)

Harry Redknapp (his arrogance is astounding but it sounds like he will finally be nailed for his financiali irregularities)

Amanda Holden (just something about the talentless trout's simpering mush)

Posh Spice (smile FFS you stringy talentless tart)

Tom Cruise (mind you you would have to extract his head from his ar*e first)

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The tw*t who comes in the shop and buys a bottle of brandy every night, and if we don't have it goes off on one.

The entire home section of Fratton Park.

The entire New Labour cabinet.

Philip Schofield.

Kim Jong Il.

 

Dog. He gets like that sometimes when he's been on the Peruvian.

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Jamie Oliver - pukka!?!?! - Why don't you pukka off you annoying c*nt

Harry Redcrapp - need I say more

Charlott Church - thankfully gone back into obscurity these days

Katie Price - honestly who actually gives a cr*p? Die and do us all a favour

Dennis Wise - Jumped up little turd

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I agree with the lad above who said piers morgan, what a snivelling two faced moron I will never forget how he put our armed forces in danger when he set up those pics a few years back, just to sell a few more papers

 

Here my 5

 

1. Piers Morgan. I want to put him on a boat and send it out into the solent, torpedo it, light a cigar and camcorder in the other hand I would watch the ****flap drown.

2. Jonathan Ross. I admit he can be funny at times, but he's also got the brownest nose in showbiz and through experience in my job I have learned to hate sycophants and arsekissers

3. Russell Brand. Apart from Brown nosers, my next pet hate is comedians who arent funny and he is amongst the worst (it was between him and billy 'I said something funny in 1982' connolly)

4. Jordan. Totally pointless celebrity who gets paid loads of money for doing **** all.

5. Debra Bell. Toffee nosed ***** from twickenham, a failed writer who has demonised 4 million weeds smokers to resurrect her career and become a kind of patron saint of talking bull****

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