DT

I think we will lose our last four. Everton are definitely beating Bournemouth on the last day, and Fat Sam will squeeze a few more points out than you give Leeds. Also think Leicester will beat Liverpool at home. Forest will beat us easily, and Palace on the last day. Let me know your winnings on the betting slips...

sorry - replied to wrong poster!

Even if they give Fat Sam a million a game and he keeps them up it is worth it. He has quite simple methods, sure. But isn't it better than Selles' boring, over complicated, crab side to side, flat back four, high press, flat white, crapuccino, false nine, false 8, false economy, Pep cos-play, random team selecting, lily-livered, slow, incomprehensible, bat-shit form of 'management'? I think it is.

I meant to say give a shit!

Or not

Forest staying up. Good manager. Players who give a shit. Wish we had even one of those two things.

He's such a powder-puff, chicken, lily-livered, sideways crab of a player, but one who can hit a dead ball very well. I think choosing him as captain has filtered all those attributes throughout the side, so we have no back-bone, and very little progressive, attacking threat. Personally think he'll go to Spurs to be with his fwend Fraser and come off the bench occasionally to take free kicks. We will need someone with a bit more gravitas and heft as a captain as we try and get better than mid-table in the Championship, and not someone whose best performances are when someone like Romeu can make up for JWP's inadequacies. I hate the way he has given up over the last months, and offered little or no rallying cry to pep up the losers around him. Hope we get good cash for him and someone buys his hype.

I see JWP has told his agent to up the 'get me out of here game', the Athletic saying that he has been open to leaving for a while. No wonder he has completely vanished on the pitch. People saying he deserves the move and it's been tough for him, like it's going down the mines or something. Give me strength. Guess he wants to beat Beck's free kick record somewhere else to shine the light on him. He's been a total powderpuff of a captain who reinforces our crab like side to side, no threat game for ages. Get rid of them all and play the kids.

Detest this club. Just want someone to actually tell Selles what a shit manager he really is. No honesty. Tell us why players aren’t being selected! It can’t be your ineptitude solely? Can it? Really?

Time to start playing the squad we might have next season. Walcott on his own, probably. I guess the best we can hope for tonight is some passion, and a win, just to let us dream that we are not going to get battered against Newcastle, who seem to have bought off the FA and Sky. Went to watch some non-league the other night. Excellent atmosphere, passion on the pitch, no little skill, and cheesy chips and beer. A tenner to get in. What's not to like? Compared to 200 quid spunked on watching our losers give no shits whatsoever against Palace the other night. This is the problem Saints will now have, until they inspire the supporters by actually trying. First out the door should be Selles, with his incredibly dour, defensive style, which was clearly seeping into Ralph too much over time, and is why we are so deathly dull and crablike across the park. Obviously Rasmus, but he will cling on like a bad turd in the toilet. Can't be arsed tonight so going to watch some (real) comedy.

It won’t be fucking hilarious. It is fucking tragic.

Scores stay the same and we’re definitely Championship

Having read the Maitland-Niles snippets about Ralph the thought occurred to me that they might be softening us up for Ralph's return. Surely not. They wouldn't. Would they?

Bielsa has taken the Uruguayan job. He'd have been ace.

Is anyone left? Has Selles got terrible halitosis?

He was definitely concussed as he looked like he gave a shit for once

Selles will do his annoying baffling selection, followed by home chicken shit defensiveness, and they will walk all over us. Our boys get up for the big games because they're on telly and all the big clubs will be watching for any player who plays well, thus earning their quick passport out of this structurally flawed shell of a club, run by a clueless algorithm muncher with a preference for batshit appointments and crazy self-belief bordering on adoration. Bournemouth will simply adopt the far simpler approach of 'attack, and try to score goals', which Selles laughs at as being hopelessly naive as he watches another Pep video and orders another rollneck in the H&M online sale. JWP will pop up another Spurs calendar he bought in the club shop, stuck at the month with Forster on it. The club will announced that another three people in key positions are leaving in the half-time break. And Selles will admit after the game that he has actually now looked at the table.

Come on Newcastle. This is hilarious

Lyanco for Alcaraz is the most moronic substitution I have ever seen. What an absolute bellend. We’ve now lost this 3 or 4-2. I cannot stand this utter twat of a manager. Alcaraz was brilliant. Better take him off then. Utter tool.

I think they’ve both downed tools. And are therefore utter cunts. This team is possibly bedding in the Championship line up. But even Selles has no motivation as he knows he’s not getting the job. JWP not motivated as he’s clearly off to Spurs. So he’s left to pick the shot that are staying put. Plus Lavia who is heartbreakingly good and spirited. Hate this club at the moment

He’s just taking the piss now

I wonder if there is anyone - anyone at all - who is competent at their job at the club. Honourable exception to Lavia. Feels like an absolute shit show from top to bottom. Is the chief cancer Ankersen?

Hey, @Pilchards - do you have any updates? Really want to believe your post but fear time ticking and isn't Selles taking a press conference today?

I would have thought that if Selles has not been moved on before Selles takes the pre-match press conference tomorrow then Selles is still staying where Selles is. Can't even cling to this bit of not shit silver lining, seemingly. Any news, Pilchards? Or do you suspect you may have been misinformed? Please offer us something!

From Brighton, where I've lived for 15 years. Check all my posts if you want to persist in this tiresome belief that everyone is as sad as you can be even bothered to change their identities on a message board, you deluded prick