Trader

Takes a man to make a girl. Fact.

These aren't genuine questions from Pompey fans. No spelling mistakes in any of them. Dead giveaway.

Three - 32, 23 and 21. Probably won't have any more.

Steely Dan

They struck water LOL. Went to low of 10p overnight. The big winner was Rockhopper. Currently Gulf Key Petroleum (260p ish) is rumoured to be subject of a takeover bid from Exxon at £19 a share. Red Emperor and Range Resources (the Aussie one) are worth a punt.

3 tiresome prats - it's all sooooooooooooo predictable. The only bit I liked was when Hammond nearly killed himself - pity he didn't break his wooden necklace though.

If you think that Geordie accent is "Lancashire dialect" you've been in Sweden too long.

Nail on head.

If you had lived more than 300 years ago the chances are that like most of the (much smaller) population you would be living in abject poverty. The big bad financial system you are so dismissive of has actually produced a standard of living which is unbelievably more affluent. But to enjoy this any individual must take some responsibility for their actions. Like keeping it in your trousers if you can't afford to pay for any consequences if you don't. I'm a big believer in the welfare state helping those who fall on hard times through no fault of their own - but that's where it should stop.

As you seem such a clueless **** I would just get the pros in. Seriously. You can make the tea. .

I think that's the Italians. The Swiss don't want to play at all.

Quite - it's all very well Fat Sam saying he wants this player or that player, but will Gold and Sullivan go along with it. The porn barons are, to paraphrase a football chant, in the sh.1t and they know they are. They, like Pompey, do not have a pot to p1ss in.

Should have turned that Alex Chamberlain away then with his skate connection. Do grow up.

Not this. But Kali Murchi in Shirley ain't bad at all.

Jesus was born in a cow's head? Wow.

He is a Muslim tbf. Not generally big on Christmas.

But they're not, are they? More various shades of brown. Just as I'm not white - more of a pinky, yellowy, light browny. Which sounds coloured. But not. If you get my drift.

Most of the comments in this article seem to be written by the more articulate, educated and intelligent Portsmouth supporters, most of which are witheringly critical of the club. As Mr. Ho seems to be reasonably articulate, educated and intelligent, I really do wonder why he continues to defend this bankrupt (both morally and financially) club. Most of its defenders both on and off the pitch seem to be of the moronic variety.

That phrase makes me feel a little ill.

France may be in "complete unbelief" but it appears no-one in this country could give a sh.1t.

If I was Mr. Thorp I'd be seeing a solicitor about a private prosecution. Could be a few grand in it for him by way of compensation.

It most definitely is illegal - unless you know what you're doing drinking it can lead to blindness and/or death because of impurities (methanol) that can be in it.

It most definitely is illegal - unless you know what you're doing drinking it can lead to blindness and/or death because of impurities that can be in it.

Tampax have announced that they are replacing the cord on their tampons with a piece of tinsel. For the Christmas period only.

Cotterill's teams are ALWAYS the better side, ALWAYS dominate the opposition and are ALWAYS really unlucky. I actively look forward to his post-match comments - even now.