scotty

http://www.sickipedia.org/forum/index.php?topic=106023.0

Change your username to "chilworthsaints", they'll snap your hand off. Sorted.

I've been thinking about doing a modern day version of "Its A Knockout". Basically, it involves 9-year old girls and rohypnol.

You're all wrong about the spaceship birds. There has only ever been one, and this is her....

If you're on a meter you'll be quids in.

"Go f*ck yourself." I told the hermaphrodite.

My wife has become schizophrenic. Which is great, because I get a threesome every night.

Nothing gets past David. Nothing at all.

I don't entirely agree with that. Money is obviously the prime motivation for most, but plenty of players have already earned their pensions by their mid-20's and want to win something, or at least play at a club they feel they would enjoy playing for and has a chance of winning silverware.

I'm sure the OP was fully expecting that, Calne Saint, given that his opening post is dripping in sarcasm itself. The thread is an exercise in sarcasm.

..so if we need any plumbing done....

Do you have a wallpaper scraper?

I'm hoping we can also nab Billy the Fish from Fulchester, as backup for Boruc. Although I heard pompey were after him too....

This. Personally, I couldn't give a flying f*ck what he says or does, having precisely zero interest in cricket. The skates are welcome to him.

Thats more ironic than you realise.

Back from his skiing holiday, my mate wheeled himself into the pub with both legs in plaster. "Christ mate," I said, "that must have been one hell of a fall!" "What fall?" he replied. "I paid for the trip with a loan from Wonga."

I have a copy of "that" FHM, the one with Ms Anderson in it that had a very short print run. If youre interested pap, it'll be on ebay shortly.

I'm disappointed, tbh. Now that Messi has fiddled his tax return I can't see us wanting to sign him. Tainted goods.

The only Espanyol game I've seen was against Celta Vigo, he looked pretty good but did as much wrong as right during that game. Aspas was terrific for Celta, and has now gone to the scousers, but the standout Espanyol player for me was Sergio Garcia. Verdu was subbed about 15 mins from the end. Thats only one game though, obviously, and one that probably didnt mean much to Espanyol who were already safe.

I don't usually quote myself, but I see Liverpool have snapped him up. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/22711082 Good bit of business for them, he looked really good in that game.

Been done, more or less. http://fashion.telegraph.co.uk/article/TMG9650631/Nicole-Scherzinger-lights-up-4G-launch-in-Twitter-dress.html

Right here in Southampton, the main piazza of the Royal Princess the day before her maiden voyage. I was working on board over the weekend, this was saturday. Beautiful ship, by the way.

There's plenty of time, take a chill pill.

"Tell me exactly what you're going to do to me", she whispered. "Be honest and graphic, it really turns me on..." "errm, ok" I stammered, "I'm going to tear your clothes off, throw you on that bed..." "Yes, yes!!" she gasped. "And then?" "...then disappoint you like you've never been disappointed before."

Heres what I'm talkin bout, tokes...