scotty

Nigel: "I hear the England jobs up for grabs Neil, they want someone English this time with a good track record and the support of the country.....oh, sorry mate, forget I spoke"

What a wimp eric is, trying to work sober. Fair enough if youre a pilot or something I suppose, but anything else? ffs

Anyone else notice that tw*t putting his f*cking lipstick on all through the game? ffs, whats he on, a retainer from avon or something? Pillock.

That's the last time I use my Sean Connery accent to tell the wife to sit on my face.

Smirkers picked up on something there that I thought at the time Billy signed. I know he had other things on his mind, and God knows they were far more important than football matters, but in his interview after signing for us I dont ever remember anybody coming across as so utterly underwhelmed about his transfer here. He actually seemed thoroughly gutted about it to me.

what, and risk a nasty case of mange?

.......and I bet you've just joined craigslist......

Last night, Supermikeys mum walked in on him masturbating. He said he wishes like f*ck that she'd stay in her own room and do it.

Golacticos correct on that one, waco being a case in point. Theres plenty of nutters hanging around every religion if you look for them. David koresh was as fruitcake as they come tbh

In the pub the other day I was telling that old joke about what do you do if you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath ? Answer. Throw in your washing. We were all having a good laugh when this big bastard tapped me on the shoulder and said '' I dont find that very funny. My brother was an epileptic and he died in the bath during one of his fits.'' I said '' Sorry mate, did he drown?'' He said '' no, he choked on a sock ''

Done. 2nd place behind holt, ffs have we no pride????

Dont really like to drag it up again, but Billy had other rather more pressing things on his mind at the time of the west ham game. Cant blame him at all for a slightly off match in the circumstances.

Dont know why I'm laughing, somehow I believe him...

Joeschmoes right, it wont be allowed to happen. The football league will find some way of letting the fishy thieves wriggle off the hook (again,) at least til the end of the season. After that they will most likely play the "plucky pompey, best fans in the world" card as usual. And yet another dodgy chancer will take a punt on the f*ckers, just as long as all the outstanding debts get written off of course.....

Glad he ate her

For your sake Daren, I hope MI5 arent monitoring your internet traffic

+1. And I wonder if Jason Euell is still playing? If we could could get him, plus Ali Dia and Ulrich van Gobbel we could be quids in here.....

That was brave of you. Respect!!

Just followed Haspers link to wiki, seems Jimmy McKintyre was from Darlaston, between Stoke and Stafford. That was one of my favourite pubs when I lived up there in the early eighties, the Darlaston Inn on the A34. It was on a roundabout in the middle of a dual carriageway, you had to drive into the car park to go there, no way of walking to it!! (not making that up )

Thats not quite accurate tho, is it. Didnt nugent send out some twitter message saying he was "going to stick it to the scummers" before the game?

A scouser mate of mine texted me a couple of weeks back. "Spielbergs making a sequel to Warhorse. Their filming it at Anfield, and its called Carthorse" He also reckons Carroll is utter shlte, but I have to agree with those above saying its hardly his fault if Liverpool overpaid massively for him. Which they did.

Alex C*ckslaid- Chamberlain

Ted "the master" Bates

Anyone else remember the South Western pub below bar, opposite where the standing orders is nowadays? Back in the eighties there was always a few Falkland Islanders frequenting that hole, I remember a tall bloke called Michael and a complete and utter nutjob going by the name of Scanner. Those two were merchant navy, when the argie invasion kicked off they were on their way back here. The story was that the crew mutinied, and headed back to see what they could do. Never seen or heard from them since.

Kerry d*ck-son Matt le Pi*sier