Deppo

I haven't been done for liable, but I have been sued for slender.

If you like drinking in a concourse, break into a disused warehouse after the match and have a few tins there.

Why doesn't he just get a mate to buy him a ticket? It would save us 8 pages of Stuart whinnying on.

He has a nice cute little brown nose. Boj? Stu?

Robsk.

Doesn't Lallana Doubtful play for the Kaiser Chiefs?

Sounds like the biggest group of closet homosexuals I have ever heard of. Can I come along?

I have some photos that you can have. Just PM me and I'll sort you out. They've mostly got me in them, but a few of them have my mate Dave in them. You can choose which ones you want.

This is getting ridiculous now. First Stu claims he knows where Thompson lives and then he reckons someone had sex with him.

I have actually met both Venables and Thompson as part of my work. I can guarantee that Thompson DOES NOT live in Chandlers Ford/Valley Park or, in fact, the South of England at all. There you all go.....the facts without the need for any cryptic "look at me" clues.

It just goes to show, you can't be too careful!

Dave Benson Phillips

You have a pm. Ignore that DBP character.

I'll take 300 please - you have a PM

Dog has a habit of leaving his 'doings' on my doorstep when I've gone out. He also sometimes smears them on my doorknob or posts them through my letterbox. I see it more as a sign of affection than anything more sinister, though.

Ponty reminds me of Pavarotti.

Boj reminds me of Kenny Everett.

Kadeem Hardison reminds me of Tiggs Theo.

Don't pretend it doesn't float yours...

It's worth it for the WWE coverage, a real sport.

No Ponty. marmite is the by product of the brewing process and has no beef in it. Bovril has beef extract. A man of your standing in the world of food should know these things.

Having said that, bread was well past its' sell by date when it became sliced anyway...

We're the best thing since sliced bread.

I've formed a band with the man that sells the Echo in Southampton City Centre.

I used to be into them just before you thought of them, but I've moved onto the next band now.