Lighthouse

Sitting in my living room with a cold, with a bog roll next to me on the sofa, then going for a dump and forgetting said bog roll, thus ending up unarmed in a state of reduced hygiene.

Girl! I wanna take you to a Che bar! I wanna take you to a Che bar! I wanna take you to a Che bar! Che bar! Che bar!

I think most fans could be similarly critical of their squads and this transfer window. Nobody else has done anything astonishing and Palace and Newcastle look decidedly weaker. Last season's squad, with Ralph, Adams and Djenepo, should be capable of a comfortable mid-table finish and some entertaining games along the way. The rest of the problems are mainly financial. Next summer we will lose Long, Cedric, Austin, Sims and maybe Yoshida. That will free up some space on the wage bill for a couple more decent players.

We could bring back Hooiveld to do that for a fraction of what we're paying Long. I've never been in our dressing room (with the team anyway) but from all our media he doesn't seem anything special. A nice bloke who gets on with everyone but hardly the glue that binds the squad together. He'll stick around for the last year of his contract. If he gets an extension I'll be pretty annoyed at how low we're aiming.

Only on Friday nights. Don't worry, no offense taken.

I don’t think I’d begrudge any 30 year old a move to China to earn dirty money whilst their stock is still high. If he was 20-25 I’d agree with you but he’s done it all. A player who has won four Champions Leagues is hardly going to be excited about the prospect of trying to qualify for it with Man Utd or Spurs.

Nowt wrong with Bitterne, although I did nearly hit a cyclist on Hinkler Rd once. He didn't have any lights on but still called me a c*nt.

Only one way to sort this out; I've called a snap general election.

I saw the title and thought you were looking for someone to drink with on matchdays. Can’t be my worse than the warm p*ss they’ve been serving the last few years.

That's my point though, there have been countless successful flair players in England and we don't try and coach it out of them. If they all came here and we told to "get back and defend, let him know you're there, stick it in the mixer FFS!" I'd agree with you but we don't. Every team needs a flare player, it's just that some are a lot better than others. Maybe some fans do get on their backs but that's a different point. I'll bet 99% of fans want these players to create chances, some just don't have the patience that comes with it. Managers don't drag them back into the dressing room at half time and show them videos of Lee Cattermole. Pep told Redmond he had to believe in himself more, not that the manager was stopping him from playing. Tadic said himself he didn't like the physicality and fixture intensity of the Premier League. We never told him to stop trying to create, Premier League defenses were just much better at stopping him than Willem II and Gronigen. I guess we'll have to agree to disagree.

Apart from Le Tiss, Zola, Cantona, David Silva, Joe Cole, Robben, Bergkamp, Ginola, Ronaldo, Pahars, Salah, Di Canio, Hazard, Pires, Ljunberg, Okocha, Van Der Vaart, Scholes, Juninho, Eriksen, De Bruyne and several dosen others. I don't get your point with those four players not being 'allowed to express themselves'. If Poch could get a tune out of Gaston/Osvaldo I don't know who you think can. Likewise Guly, who played in the most goal happy dominant team we've ever had under Adkins. If he isn't expressing himself when we're basically winning two leagues back to back, I don't know when he's supposed to. Redmond's problem was confidence more than anything and never having a decent striker to work with.

Nobody is going to pay for a fullback coming back from an ACL, with 6 months left on his contract. IF he is fit by January, he might get a loan, then leave on a free in summer.

He didn't. After that goal Boufal started 5 of the next 6 (and was only dropped for City away) and did absolutely bugger all. The celebration was arrogant and disrespectful. Made worse by the fact that he had done nothing for about a year leading up to it and had no right to be demanding a starting spot.

If you're enough of a mug to bet on football transfers based on dubious media reports, you deserve to lose your money IMO.

If you're enough of a mug to bet on football transfers based on dubious media reports, you deserve to lose your money IMO.

I don't think it's ever been claimed that he is unpopular in the dressing room. The problems with his attitude tend to arise when things aren't going his way. The acid test will be when he has a few poor games and is dropped or subbed off and how he responds to that. If he reacts like he did to MoPe, after his WBA goal, he will likely end up in A&E with a Ralph sized footprint in his forehead.

No, we have six.

TV channels showing the same episode of a show every night for about two weeks. Not even a new show either, a repeat of something which came out 5 years ago.

No way they will all start and I'd be surprised if Djenepo gets on the pitch at all for a fixture like Burnley away. It will likely be JWP or Armstrong in his place.

I'd never heard of this lad, or seen anything of him, before this transfer window. We MIGHT just have a chance, if he and his agent see us as a stepping stone. The massive fees for Stones, Walker, Shaw, VVD and Maguire have shown just how important PL experience is for the big clubs, especially when buying defenders. Mangala is just the Upamecano of five years ago, perhaps City don't want to take the same expensive risk. Having said all that, I still don't see him coming here.

Men in wheelchairs aren’t really my thing, so I’ll pass thanks.

Boufal made little impact under Puel or MoPe, then immediately failed to impress Hughes and fell out with him. He went to Spain, scored 3 goals, was often subbed off first when they were in need of a goal or simply dropped from the XI. Now (IF these stories are to be believed) Ralph seems to have little interest in him either. None of our rivals, even the newly promoted sides, seem interested in poaching him at a knock down price. What will it take to convince some people he just isn’t good enough.

Fair enough, thought that's what you might have been suggesting. There are people convinced we did that with Osvaldo for some reason.

We're hardly going to do that. Whatever deal has been struck, we must be getting something out of it.

I think he’s Joseph Minala’s older brother.