Patrick Bateman

Wasn't overly sure where the 5 minutes came from to be honest?

I do like him, he's a good goalie, but I agree with the bit in bold. (But where is Alpine and what have you done with him?)

A hot cup of bovril can be a painful tool you know!

I know it's extremely unlikely, but I really hope it's Redknapp. I want him to sign Sandro and Rio Ferdinand on £200k/week. Triffic lads, get pros.

Whoever wrote that needs new glasses - the report say's $183m, not $183bn ... !! Also, quite a few mistakes in there such as, "had of marketing".

3 months until they can move in the next transfer window, obviously.

I hope as you came to your conclusion, you had a really satisfying splash.

This.

He's a deluded mentalist, trying to talk himself up and save his job. He's also an utter helmet.

Whereas us singing at 2am that "Southampton boys are in town" in Seattle is perfectly normal behaviour (good days!)

I can't be bothered talking football at work as they're all "new" fans who follow (note the use of the word follow rather than support) Man U, Arsenal, Liverpool and Chelsea. I just can't be bothered speaking to them as they're full of sh*t. The one guy who really knows his football is annoyingly, a Spurs fan.

Manchester Uniteds. I always look out for their score and I make sure I watch every match on TV. I have a half n half shirt with Southampton and Manchester Uniteds and I got Cantona on the back.

Facebook (and Twitter) are just a pain, really want to delete my accounts, however; I tend to use Facebook for messaging friends rather than texts and it IS good for arranging group meetings and events. So until something else is mainstream that is good for events, then Facebook works. I do also like the car crash viewing and having something to moan about with bad grammar, stupid shared things and ridiculous unfounded statements, complete with a picture to 'prove it'. Generally I used LinkedIn a lot for work as that's a social media platform that is actually helpful. But I've noticed this ridiculous behaviour creeping on there too so I've started removing connections who do this.

I'll wait for The9, but are we (English teams) in danger of losing a place in Europe anytime soon by the constant underperforming of recent years? (I know this isn't the right thread, but I'm just curious)

Well let's see if he lives up to the apology!

You're a comic genius!

1. Start a radio station 2. Invest in the best catering in the football universe 3. Build myself a lift 4. Buy a new painting for the boardroom 5. Erect a statue of myself out the front

All of the above - except 5, wouldn't even give them any attention, insignificant morons.

That's my question, I don't really know where he fits in - will be interesting to see what happens when he's fit!

And I presume we'll be seeing Wanyama/Clasie and not not Wanyama/JWP when Jordie is fit? I can't see where else he'd fit in, at the moment.

To be fair, I don't normally give a toss about the running order on MoTD as the games are picked for what they think people want to see first. However, going straight to another game with commentary did annoy me - again, not that I care what they say, but that's not the point.

2015/16 season ... he becomes the amazing player we all wanted, then f**ks off for nothing in the summer

I have no words.

Never mind Tranmere (although that was hideous), it's the Ronnie Rosenthal night that still f**ks me off.