Barry the Badger

What did he actually do?

I thought we were up already. I saw a 'Saints on Fire' promotion charity single on itunes so it must have happened already.

Just watched the extended highlights, makes us look even better than I remember. Commentator opened it by saying "it's a flat midfield four, none of this diamond nonsense today". What a pr*ck.

The Palace fans in the pub after the game said this too, 4mil they reckon. They also said they think he's better than Rafael.

No, we can beat them. I want us to win the league.

You cannot be serious

We ended up going in a pub near Norwood Junction called the Jolly Sailor (I think) to watch West Ham. Got chatting to some Palace fans and they were saying they might hope for relegation next season as it seems to be a good way of building momentum for the Championship :-) They didn't believe me when I said Lambert wasn't fully fit. All in all a cracking away day, felt spookily reminiscent of Orient away last season.

I am a player. I was planning to just drift through the last six games and see what happened but I'm definitely going to be trying harder now.

She is a blatant troll to be fair. She's probably laughing her ugly face off.

So was mine. Would you take a bad thing, death, in exchange for a good thing, promotion.

They have 78 players on loan but the Football League have given dispensation as Pompey have assured them they are all emergency goalkeepers.

Except they play before us.

That's not a very good one. You have to say something that happened ages ago, something that is old news. Come on, try again, I'm sure you will do better this time.

Made me smile anyway.

Scum rises to the top, skates swim around at the bottom.

If I had no legs I wouldn't be able to stand in the northam, so I would struggle to see. But if I had no arms I wouldn't be able to smash those backboards along with our songs. On reflection, I will go for no arms and use my head to hit the backboards.

It's important that you decide whether you prefer to be dead and promoted or alive and a hero but not promoted. Imagine if the crocodile came on the pitch and you hadn't got your head clear on what you would do in that situation. Your dithering could cost us promotion.

Only in option 1, but you will be dead so don't factor it in too much.

Hypothetical question. Which would you choose??? 1 - Saints win on Saturday, with Rickie Lambert scoring the winner, but shortly after the final whistle a crocodile comes onto the pitch and bites off one of his toes. Desperate to help you run onto the pitch but the crocodile enlists the help of a Hyena which chases you until you die. Saints go on to win the league. 2 - Saints lose 73-1 on Saturday, shortly after the final whistle a crocodile comes onto the pitch and you run on and tackle it before it can attack Rickie, you then fight off the Hyena and are proclaimed a hero and given a hug by Steve De Ridder. Saints go on to lose in the playoffs. Just interested.

IF we do it, the very second promotion is confirmed a whole world of new transfer possibilities would open up.

Joe, Don't forget your jumper saturday. I know you feel the cold. Barry

Not embarassed but a little frustrated. My Liverpool supporting mate texted me to say "so this is the wonderful football you've been telling me about all season". Arse.

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=train+tickets#