Patrick Bateman

Almost as if the Saints goalkeepers need a decent defensive line to play behind ...

I don't care. If Saints were competing, I'd care. Liverpool are looking incredible, I think they'll walk it, but whatever.

If they're part time, where is he training?? Back with Saints? Very odd.

Redmond is massively key. If he had been on the pitch last weekend, Saints would've won. I want to see Djenepo back too. Hassenhüttl needs a selection headache.

There is no bubble.

I guess if they play regularly and impress, they may have more options for being sold to other teams in Jan or next summer. So a saving, no matter how small could help long term if they perform elsewhere. Of course the opposite is true ... ugh.

Agreed. I'm not paying those prices, sorry, but attending in person isn't as enjoyable anymore and is ridiculously expensive.

Che Adams will come good, I have faith in him as a purchase. He needs a different partner though I think ... I want to see him with Long in the 2nd half.

100% this!

I think he's fast on the training ground. Problem is, the rest of the squad are slow as f**k.

Go and film a vlog.

Sorry, he's right.

Fleet. Last train 11pm.

... an after dinner speaker, free programme and a padded seat?

Turkish, how are you? We've not seen you for a few matches, are you okay? I was wondering do you want to buy hospitality?

Yes, I had a call trying to sell me hospitality. It's a normal sales call, but it does seem a bit odd for a football club to be making outbound sales calls ...

He'd make a great assistant manager to Hassenhüttl with his speed of thought.

Or even take a healthy lunch on the train - no need to drive. Train + eat ... economise on time.

This. "FFS, It's 2:55pm, let's stuff as much cholesterol and saturated fats down as we can, before we have to wait until 3:45pm to do it again"

Peas with an apostrophe. I think you're right, uni grad gimp in attempting to have a go at marketing, shocker.

It's complete madness. I can't believe anyone will be suckered in by that? OPPORTUNITY TO PURCHASE - that's still making me laugh this morning.

That survey was a joke, but obviously enough people answered it saying they'd spend more ... ?? Unless they only targeted a certain segment of the fanbase?

Who the f**k is going to purchase this? And open to away fans?? I give up. Southampton FC, you're screwing up. I'll leave this here; "Opportunity to purchase from American diner menu" OPPORTUNITY TO PURCHASE

Enjoy your vegan burger ...

What a joke this is. Football is dead. Overpaid, disconnected, disloyal players who think they're super stars with no grounding in reality. Can't celebrate a goal properly while they check VAR. Can't shout at the away team. So I expect half the stadium will be ejected today when Lovren/Van Dijk/Lallana show up. Can't be drunk?? WTF?? I shall enjoy watching the scores on ceefax then.