suewhistle

As subtle and as over-the-top as a Benali two-footed tackle, dear thing! You really wouldn't want to be around me when I've an iron at hand, particularly the one I use for waxing my skis. . Always have my edging file handy as well.... I had a beautician friend who used to deal with the girls at a local "specialist" house, and she passed on some hilarious stories. The good thing from the point of view of the working girls apparently was that they didn't actually have to touch the clients... not so much working at arms length, but whip length, I suppose.

Oh sod! I wrote that and then realised there'd been more postd on the thread...: "I find two hair ties in my bag and quickly put my hair in pigtails. Yes! The more girly I look the safer I'll be." Yeah that ought to do it you dumb fvvck. Put on your school uniform. Dudes hate that." Me collapsing in giggles again....

Jez, Jez, Jez, you've really missed the point.. O.K., so I'm a girly, but the whole point about Bearsy's review is to put you _off_ reading the book. Bearsy's review has had me in stitches (the sexist bastard!;-) ), but look at Lazlo's comment below.... a very good summing up of the affair!

http://www.honestjohn.co.uk/askhj/answer/35964/buying-a-vauxhall-insignia---why-such-high-depreciation-

Don't give Bearsy ideas, FFS!

And they say _we're_ *****y! Anyway, no cellar work last night as I'm playing footie this afternoon on a bloomin' big pitch, and although I have extremely fit legs (albeit a footballer and skier's) I'm not as young as I used to be (I believe that's the phrase to use..). Rule 1: http://www.footballzz.com/estadio.php?id=8291 :-)

Ah well, said American tourist knbew a bit about wines so I hoiked out a few good ones... OK, I'm a bit short down in the cellar for you DP, but I have a few bottles of Brakspears remaining and some thirst quenchers from Jennings of ... no, I can't say it.. even if it's actually true..

... oh, and we left the barmen at the bar... PS: The Petite Arvine was a white...the rest were red...

I've not long bought my first smart phone: a Samsung using Windows 7.5 and it does everything I need. Unlocked it cost me £142, so although I'm sure some people have the money and the need, I'd still look around before committing so much money.

I know, it's embarassing that I've popped in again; so is snorting with laughter - most inelegant! Various comments spring to mind.. I can't help thinking Bearsy "knows the difference between a hawk and a handsaw" and which Shakespeare play it comes from. Actually, perhaps he can remind me... I think it's Hamlet...?? I'm not sure he needs Kleenex, he doesn't seem the crying type.. Don't worry Bletch, we're not too worried about the lack of a female perspective... laughing too much to mind! As your Mrs has noted, not a well-written book, and that has been vividly communicated by Bearsy! Still waiting for the next chapters though. Anyway, there was this American tourist in my town two weeks ago. The barman in my local wine bar asked for some help in translating: numerous red wines later I invited them back to my flat to raid my cellar and to try a few more local wines and a few other local things.... I'm thinking of writing a short story called "50 shades of red"..

**** peru india sierra sierra

In summary: PortsmouthFC and the football league are cacking themselves in fear at the outcome of any actual er.... decision, PKF and various litigation lawyers are rubbing their hands with glee at the prospect of more per diems and PTS fans are ****ing themselves laughing. Would that be a fair summary? [oh, and the premiership, or whatever it's called today, are thinking "these parachute payments are a real pain".]

Is it time to make up the bingo cards with appropriate and predictable phrases? Quid each and first to a line of three phrases in the same interview takes all..

Never read it Bearsy, but I think you've probably summed it up pretty well... "I'm already investigating that this ain't gonna be a very well written book." It might be the couple of glasses of wine in various shades of red, but I'm laughing...

Absolutely, as is your comment about football inflation. You're no doubt familiar with the economists' use of Mars Bar pricing as a judge of relative inflation: how much something has gone up compared with other products. I use the "beer" pricing model, which although it uses a product that has gone up faster than many other products is a useful comparison with football tickets, given that they have an almost symbiotic relationship. Thus many years ago when I was a student at Soton Uni a ticket to The Dell cost about 3 to 4 times the cost of a pint, and I drank in some right dodgy boozers, I can tell you, as long as the beer was OK. [if I find who introduced me to decent beer I shall probably kill them;-)] How much is it now? 10 pints worth or more per game, or earlier in the season at Man City around 17 times! (If I'd found a Joseph Holt's pub it would have been more like 20...) Now that _is_ inflation!

Mind you Steve, unless BHA expand the ground the crowd capacity of SMS should help, given that the Rugby Union have to give the IRB £81million and need to sell a shed load of tickets. We're talking Pompey CVA figures here!

Er... yes, absolutely! Thanks for summing it up so well Mr Beech. How else would you explain it? More slack-jawed amazement from everybody else..

I didn't see the game or even listen to commentary but it doesn't seem to stop other people commenting... From what I've seen of other games I think the substitution of Lambert may have been to protect him. He's big and getting on a bit and struggles to maintain peak fitness and by all accounts wasn't having a good game: I'd imagine those considerations contributed to the decision. As for Puncheon, I've noticed from watching him live that he fades rapidly towards the end of games and this particularly impacts his covering back. I'll go and have a look on Saints player in the week to come to my own conclusions ("Morgan couldn't trap a ball","Morgan MOTM"..) hmm..

Just arriving at the away ground for our game, so at least i won't get stressed out by the match day thread. If you think saints fullbacks are bad... Back later, need to concentrate. Cheer me up saints!

We (the UK) have the most expensive ticket prices in Europe and here we are wondering about crowd numbers and debating if there is any impact on crowds due to our prices. You do wonder what world some of our posters inhabit: certainly not a commercial one, or maybe an obtuse "I'm alright, Jack" one... So how do Bayern do it, or Dortmund, who until I saw them play the other day just thought were a Bomber Command target... As for the question someone asked a bit earlier: why wouldn't existing season ticket holders not go and buy some of the cheaper tickets: well.. those who were eligible through being of the right age might do so, those who didn't mind where they sat might do so, but there'd be lots of opportunities to those who currently can't afford it regularly to go. I really struggle to understand why people find difficult to understand the German model. I'd also like to know what the only person to talk about 'slashing' prices actually means by that. Is that 10% off like Tesco, or something else?

Apparently there are men known to the NHS who have had children by at least 8 women. What are we going to do about them? This argument is appalling and I've rarely been so angry. Glib statements by men (and sorry Alps, I'm not particularly picking on you here) who are pontificating as if it were nothing to do with them. Do you really think someone who has had 8 abortions (even if such is true) is somebody with adequate mental capacity to make any decision (such as saying no to an abusive guy), let alone deal with the consequences of a full term? What are you going to do about the fathers? And is that an example that you would wish to bring in to a serious debate? What I've noticed with this debate is a serious detachment about the state of pregnancy to the act which actually caused it..Again I'm not suggesting names here.. those who are against abortions are generally against social assistance in general. It reminds me of a story about the war in ex-Jugoslavia: a woman gave birth to a war rape baby - she looked at gently it as it was born and then.. gently smothered it. The current government are cutting back on assistance for people with disability and their ***** of a minister is suggesting shortening the period for abortions to 12 weeks. My nephew's wife has just had a scan at that period: thank goodness all is well; and any baby is going to be loved to bits by her aunty, whatever her state. But I'd love to run amok with a castrating knife amongst those who think abortion is normally an easy option for any woman. Bastards.

And with one final guffaw I'm going out for the evening, laughing my socks off and in a thoroughly good mood!

I didn't know he was a paediatrician...

What would they know about revenue streams? I presume they had them when they were getting 20k crowds and TV money, but if so they don't seem to have much to show for it. £190m in debt would suggest debt streams...