Alain Perrin

By this evidence, we are by far the most educated supporters in the Premier League. Indeed, like any class of achievers, there are always a few disruptive individuals who think it's funny to sit at the back of the class making the same noise over and over again (think, Saint Charlie, Alpine and Glasgow). Eventually, they either either buck up their ideas or end up like Pastor Patron and Sidney Fudpucker in the Special Educational Needs class. Anyway, back to the Bard....

It's a yes for Sterling. His stupid "I'm not a short arse" haircut has been in Southampton since he heard about our bid....

Clearly you're arsed enough to post on a message board. Otherwise I'd have been worried about the dampness of your sheets / state of your wrists.

Mods, can we rename this thread "Pedantic bickering ****s only", it feels more appropriate.

Speaking on behalf of the bedwetters everywhere, I haven't slept since through worry.

Look, it was a dodgy curry. It won't happen again.....

This. Yes he was behind the pace, and we've got to hope he gets to grips with it (and fast). He has the attributes to succeed (accepting his first touch isn't a patch on Lambert's) but he needs chances. In fairness, Ollson is a man mountain so it wasn't easy today. It might seem overly charitable but what option do we have, bench an 8m purchase? He needs time to adapt.

Calm down (period started?). Sure Brendan may have a plan but I'm not convinced in him. If you look at their message boards their fans at least see Lambert as someone who "brings them something different" and it's a common view in the press (ie. Pre-WC debate of Lambert vs. Carroll). It's not right but it is a perception. I think Lambert is a smashing player, more as a creator for others than back post big man, I fear though using him as an impact player isn't best use. Time will tell.

Didn't the Boruc hand injury also coincide with Big Vic and Lovren getting crocked? In my opinion that was a greater influence in us conceding more than the keeper choice. Clearly we did / we will miss Boruc but there were other factors too that made Gazza / KD look bad statiscally.

Part of the problem is I think they see Rickie as a big man/something different in the Andy Carroll mode ( that worked out well). It is the same view as was commonly held by media / fans at the World Cup and we know that it underuses RL. That said, I think for a pay rise and a few minutes here and there I'd play for my boyhood club. Plus nutjob Mario will be suspended half the time.

Sterling suffers from short man syndrome and is trying to compensate with a couple of inches of crazy barnet.

Not forgetting to brief the press each time that it's our final, FINAL offer.

Brendan Rogers is a knobber

Brendan Rogers is a knobber

All businesses should consider alternative strategies, it doesn't mean they execute on them.

All businesses should consider alternative strategies, it doesn't mean they execute on them.

I think he's not as bad as people make out. He's not the ideal partner for Fonte though. He needs a big unit, decisive CH alongside him. Although he's come across as a cock, Lovren was that ideal partner.

It's because his head was already in Liverpool, the body is just catching up.

Interesting game this. For Liverpool it will be like playing a newly promoted side, they won't know what to expect, tactically or technically. If we can surprise them, and the negative of not gelling isn't too great, we could cause an upset.

I think people are confused here. Morgan had a meeting with the club in which he was told they weren't prepared to sell. Ralph then did some press and reiterated that. People are acting like the first Morgan heard of it was the press conference and that's incorrect. Personally I'm glad the club are standing firm. Unlucky for Morgan (should've been Lovren or Chambers) but it's provided some backbone.

I suspect it is a game of dominos at the moment. Clearly we are willing to spend 10+ million on a CB, so are others. Man U are after Hummels. If they get him, then we have a chance with Rojos, if not we have Florin, if not Vlaar. Clearly Vlaar is an option but old and expensive. I expect deadline day will be busy for us.

.... With a gammy knee

Excellent addition to the "Players with accents in their names" thread.

Two words. Karel Poborsky. Legend in his own lunchtime.

I suspect it's a Centre back beginning with V. If Rojo happens we don't go with V1, if V1 says no, perhaps we go V2. Simple.