Whitey Grandad

We're overcrowded and it's stifling every aspect of our lives. The official figures for the population of Britain are enormous under-estimates and I once saw a figure of 80 million. We can't move, we can't travel on the roads, the trains are full, we can't park in our local supermarkets, we can't find a dentist, we can't even find a campsite in summer. Any talk of economic benefits from immigration is a load of bullocks.

Oh dear. When you're in a hole, stop...

That could happen under a hung parliament (shouldn't that be 'hanged'? ). If it did turn out that way, there would be riots, and I might be at the front of them.

The price of that would be proportional representation and I've not seen any system that I like. The transferrable vote thing means that you don't know who you're voting for. The present european elections are meaningless because your vote could go to anybody, and I like to be able to question the person who is going to represent me. Find a good man/woman and let them makethe decisions on your behalf.

Ah, silly me, I thought you were one of them.

I remember the last Lib-Lab pact and all the indecision and dithering. Nothing would get done, nobody could make any plans, no legislation could be passed. Instead of concensus there would be endless meetings and procrastination. We wouldn't get the average of the parties, we would get the lowest common denominator, which is zilch. There should be abox for 'none of the above. I'm not enamoured by any of them, but some poor sod's got to clean up all this mess and there's only one real candidate for that.

Then she would make an ideal politician!

Believe me, you do not want that. Be afraid.... Be very afraid.

Don't you mean this fellow:

The way things are going a lot more of it will go by sea but the delivery times will have to go out another 4 to 6 weeks and I expect that all the customers will go elsewhere. The freight companies will all be increasing their rates from now on and the end-user will have to pay. There is a half-way system where the goods are flown to the Middle-East and then shipped from there which brings the time down to 2 or 3 weeks. People often forget the hidden costs of living on an island. Everything we buy or sell has to be put on a plane or a boat, you can't just chuck it on a lorry and have it arrive in a couple of days. That's one of the reasons that Germany is so dominant in trade.

Might I presume that she knows more about the local situation in Rocdale than you or I?

Fair enough.

There are two parties to any contract, so I would expect that to mean that they have offfered him an extension to his current contract. It would be up to him whether he accepts it.

I'm still waiting for a shipment of printed-circuit boards from China. They were put on the aircraft on Monday 12th and they haven't been seen since. The latest rumour is that they were off-loaded in Delhi but nobody can find any trace of them. It's part of a shipment of 350Kg so it can't be easy to overlook it. There 12 other companies who are in the same position and can't meet their production needs so someone might get laid off. It's British Airways Cargo, but you probably guessed that anyway.

How are they the biggest club? In terms of debts?

Don't Reading have to offer him a contract in order to get compensation for a player who is under 24 years old?

But even if they had stayed in the Premier League, they would not have been able to continue trading. They owe tens of millions for this season and have faced a winding-up order. The extra income from the PL would not arrive until next year.

Prostitution is legal. Running a brothel is not.

I'm sure there will be a big shake-up over the summer and I would agree with most of your list with the addition of Molywho. At least Otsemebor is a specialist full-back, although he's nothing special. Maybe worth having as a stand-in, but I'd like to think that we could do a lot better. Central midfield is where we're lacking. Maybe Oakley might like to move back?

Since Newcastle and West Bromwich were promoted after one season, their remaining parachute payments are shared amongst the other CCC clubs. Do these payments also go to the newly-relegated clubs? One would assume not, but you never know.

Quite correct. But if it started outside and continued inside for a couple of yards then Seabourne was going being pushed backwards and was being fouled in the process.

That's good advice. See if you can suggest ways in which employing you is going to help their business.

Lying on your CV is a serious business and it could cost you more than your new job.

Simple. Buy up all those players and next season it will be!

Into the next county?