Crab Lungs

And what's more, that makes it all the more illogical. I see Grant Holt had another rant at the England setup - and he's bloody spot on, too. Glad someone will say something; He's obviously written off any chance he ever had but I just hope his words don't fall on deaf ears. They probably will though, such is the ridiculous, antiquated setup of the England squad.

Yup. I've also worked with those nutters too. Absolutely bonkers. They left me with a very confused opinion of Sweden. They did, however, introduce me to Swedish breakfasts, which is a positive.

As a swede, would you know who Olinda Borggren and Patrick Larsson is?

It's **** club, **** manager swap shop season .... ... hang on, that means we're been involved too

Mark Hughes...

I'm sure welbeck, Zamora or sturridge can do that. :S

I'll do the Brett Ormerod bit, you just head the ball in. It'll work out ok.

Oh, and btw... these findings are completely unbiased and can be viewed, as evidence here;

Call me Mr Boring, but I decided to take a look at how we rated against the bestest fans in the whole wide world TM in the eyes of opposition supporters... ladies and gents, these are impartial views from visiting fans over the past 2-3 years. No undercover scummahs - this should once again, prove yet another PortsMYTH to be false. Enjoy; On St Mary's and the faaaaaaaaaaaaaackin' scummah support Comments from a Skate; In interest of fairness, here's a (non too credible) account from a Villa fan; On Fratton Park and the bestest in the world TM Here's one of the best ones .... and in the interest of fairness, a positive experience; Well, kind of... anyway, I digress...;

Nickname: "Crabs" "Threemo" "Lungs" "CL" and "El Lungo" Position: Number 10 Preferred shirt number: 3 Playing Ability: Low-World Class (there's a lot of variation) Playing Style: Bale/Ibrahimovic Fitness Level: 6 months ago, superb - currently, awful. Likelihood of turning up: Unknown I'm sure you won't find too many discrepancies in the above.

I guess my post was removed for trolling/offensive reasons. It'll be interesting to see if any of MLG's trolling posts get removed in the future.

UEFA, FIFA are going to love this.

No qualms with his prediction, but I don't remember Liverpool going close 4-5 times? I do, however, remember us battering them and missing another 4-5 good chances aside of our goals.

Montenegro has a smaller population than Birmingham and they're far better than us as a team. As someone said above, they pick the best available to them, not just from the four most favoured big clubs. We, on the other hand, continue to pick tried-and-tested losers and overrated youngsters. This video sums it all up. "The New Paul Scholes" Jack Rodwell. Watch his first touches for his deflected goal versus the Azeri U21 side. Yes, THE AZERI U21 side. His first touch sums up everything that's wrong with football in this country. Look at the players we've capped recently.... Livermore, Henderson, Shelvey, Cleverley... are they really dynamic, creative midfielders who can unlock a defence? Look at who we've got upfront. Danny Welbeck, 1 goal all season in the Premier League. Look at our midfield tonight. Cleverley... overrated beyond all recognition, Milner, uninspiring and uncreative, Gerrard "hollywood baller" and lost his legs. I love my country and want them to qualify for tournaments but we really don't deserve it playing this crap all the time.

So Delap is better than Cork and Schneiderlin is not as good as Prutton? Lallana is not as good as Fernandes and Clyne is worse than Dodd? I don't agree with that.

Another Gerrard "Hollywood" ball getting us in trouble...

Then again, I might be wrong. Still, it's really a sad state of affairs when that's the best lineup we can come up with.

I predict we'll be outplayed by yet another small international team but somehow win or draw and everything will be ok again.

Christ, what a terrible side.

Reading are two games short of making a fist of it IMO. If they had 10 games left, they'd have a chance IMO. The damage is done, but they still might be a bit of a wounded animal. They'll beat us no doubt.

Shame this the only version I could find after a quick search but it's still great to watch. I'd have loved to have done that, or Beatts/Sharp's celebrations infront of those pikey shysters.

Somebody fetch me a waambulance

That's superb and worrying, all at the same time! Come to think of it... you obviously know me from somewhere.... I'm assuming we've met outside of the mongboard world...

Pearce can f()ck off. He thought Lallana wasn't good enough in a midfield that included Henderson, Albrighton, Cleverley, Muamba, Lansbury and Rodwell. Granted, not all "creative" players but pound-for-pound, Lallana beats the spots off them. Welbeck, Delfouneso and Wickham as three of the four strikers too. It won't matter anyway soon, he'll be a full international soon irrespective.