Secret Site Agent

Nah

Isn't that option z)?

Perhaps we should have a Poll. Reason why Ronald Koeman hasn't signed the Everton contract a) He's staying at saints b) He's holding out for the Holland job c) He's holding out for Everton to agree that his brother can come with him d) He wants more money e) He's hoping Barca comes in with a swooping offer f) It's all a dream and we will wake up in the shower g) The corpse of Jeremy Beedle whips off his Erwin masks and says we are all Game For A Laugh h) It's holiday time and there is planty of time to sign over the summer,autumn,winter,spring i) He just wants his 7 million so he can roll about in it, with some stuck in his ears on fire, until he signs on the dotted line. j) He'll only sign when Rudi Skácel has k) He'll only sign for Everton as long as their Millionaire moves them to the South Coast as it's too cold up north l) He wont sign until they give him his war chest........in an actual war chest........and in dubloons. m) He's a little bit worried that the MIrror poll about him being a success has the 'NO' vote at 50 % n) He wants an assurence that if he stays, he's allowed to call John Stone, Joss Stoned. o) Ronald wants to know why Farhad Moshiri isn't Sheik Farhad Moshiri before he signs p) Ronald is afraid that he may confuse Farhad Moshiri with Eric Morcombe q) After smoking a bad Jamaican Woodbine on holiday, he has had a bad trip where he thinks he has signed for a team of Chewy Confectionary r) He thought he was going to be manager of the other team from Liverpool s) Based on his experience of Jurgan Klopp, he is afraid that spontanous, orgasmic movements on the touchline is an expectation of Liverpudlian football t) He is still upset at Bill Kenwright refering to his brother as Erwin Rommel u) He knows they have a long and proud history, but can't understand why they are called the toffees and not the Mints v) He would like to sign but his last agent, that Guido mother****er, stole his only pen w) He would like to sign, but first wants to know who this 'Whack' character is. x) He would sign but wants assurences he wont be refered to as some dodgy amaerican cutlery manufacturer from the seventies, i.e. Ronko y) He wont sign until the individual that removed the wheels from his Daimler gives them back. And finally, z) He wont sign as he is an honerable man of his word, who said he would see out his contract at Southampton and intends to do just that, and this is all his new agents doing and a lot of speculation in the media.

That would be the jape of the year. No, the century.

Doesn't anyone think it;s strange that apparently Koeman is joining Everton yet the deal isn't yet done? And he just goes off on holiday again? I mean, he was pretty relaxed when he was going to sign an extention with us. I think it's strange that he's jetted off to Barbados with Bert van Oostveen, rather than signing with Everton. Still could just be me.

Nothing apart from the two snags mentioned before. I like Eddie Howe, however I don't think we will go for him, but will probably look at Frank De Boar as we prefer not to look to poach other teams managers, but look at free agents. I think that Ron will do really well for you over the next two years and will leave you in a better place than you are now. Good luck and I hope all goes well, especially with your new backer and his mullions.

The situation is Saints want 5 million, and it keeps going up by the hour. We also want first dibs on Stonesy BUT you don't want Erwin, which will sour the deal. happy to help.

Hey Ron, Saints have agreed to 5 million But they don't want Erwin

I jsut saw a raw feed from SSN: Rob Jansen: I would likes to announces that ve have negotiated a deals for Ronalds to go to Heverton for de sum of FIF MILLION PUNDS. Les Read: And John Stone. Rob turns away from the camera Rob Janson: What? Les Read: 5 million and John Stones Rob turns back to the camera RJ: I'll be back. He he he. You have to just laugh at situations like this, dontcha.

It's taking it's time for him to be annouced and the comp package seem to be going up. Apparently, perhaps, this is happening: Everton: So, we want Ron, How much compo do you want? SFC: We would like 3 million, based on you paying him £7 million in wages and we need to get another manager EFC: Fine, 3 mill it is. SFC: Great, so give us the 3.5 million and we are done. Sign here. EFC: Ok so I need... hang on a minute, we agreed 3 miilion. You just said 3.5. SFC: Thats right. I think you heard wrong. We agreed 4 million. EFC: 4? I thought you said 3? SFC: No, you must have mishead. We said 4. EFC: Ok, 4 miilion...... SFC: And a half EFC: Eh? SFC: four and a half million is the figure. EFC: Why is it now 4 and a half million? SFC: Beacuse we haven't got to 5 million yet. EFC: Look, you started at 3 million, now it's 4.5 million. Is that it? SFC: Yes that is it. The figure for Compensation to us for you to sign Ronald Koeman as your manager is £5 million, or as we refer to it down here, 0.42 of a $long in Compo. EFC: When did it get to 5 million? SFC: Just a minute a go. EFC: When? SFC: When you asked why it was 4.5 million. EFC: Look, if you don't stop messing around, we'll **** off back to Liverpool and you wont get you compo! SFC: Fine by us, don't let the door hit you on the way out.

There are a lot on here that could do with a cup of that coffee I'll tell you. I share the same sentiments. I am a little disappointed in this all,I really thought Ron was a gentleman and a man of his word,but perhaps not. Still we'll keep on rolling in each season with the highs and lows. After all,it wouldn't be Saints would it.

According to Adam Blackmore, Koemans agent indicated that there is an offer on the table from Saints, no offer from Everton. That was 4hours ago though. https://twitter.com/bigadamsport Also reckons that this would be a step backward for him, having to re-build, no European football. I would like to believe him but.......

My Heart would go with A), my head with C)

All of the above. And I don't mean any, I think we should ahve all of them as our jpoint managers. A superteam if you will of footballing geneouses who bring with them a cornocopia of knowledge, talent and contacts and, hey lets face it, if we lose one or two to another team, it doesn't matter as we have continuity. Kat can afford all of their wages, i'm sure. You can probably see I am not taking this thread too seriously.

This. But I for one think we need Rooney. After, if we need a striker, he can play there. If we are lacking a No 10,he can play there, if we need wide men, he can play there, if we need a wing back, he can play there, if we need a centreback, he can play there, if we need a goalie, he can play there, if we need an assistant manager, he can play there, if we need a waterboy, he can play there. Roy has no idea, no passion, and just wants a team he can put Rooney in. It wouldn't suprise me if he gets his team sheet out and Gary Neville and Ray Lewington have to quickly start tipp-exing out names to remind Roy that Gerrard, beckham et al are all retired and he is just left with a sheet with Rooney, Milner and Hart on it and they get him to fill in the blanks.

LOOK AT ME!!!!!! LOOK AT ME!!!!!!!!! FROM MY HEAD TO MY TOES, LOOK AT MEEEEEE!!!!!!!! Sorry, couldn't resist. Go on them, i'll go with Bielsa, a good call i'll say.

So that would be 14 players from a bag containing Man U, Man City, Arsenal, Chelsea and Vardy. No, like the rules as it makes the team more representative, removes the big team bias, and would be a laugh, PLUS all the fans would get behind their player and team.

Just a quick question, and it'll stop me staring another thread just to get an answer. Has anyone ever watched an England game lately and though, 'Christ we need Rooney on.' I will concede his goal was a blinder, but it was against Australia. I just wish he would bloody retire, then Woy could stop feeling he has to pick him because ...'he's the team capting(sic)'.

WHAT???????? NO!!!!!!!!! WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN!!!!!!!!! WHY DID NO ONE TELL US!!!!!!! HE NEVER GAVE US ANY IDEA!!!!!! WHAT A BOLT OUT OF THE BLUE THIS WAS!!!!!!!! I also notice that the sky is blue, birds sing in trees, an object falls at 9.81 m/s/s and the big name star in Columbo/Murder She Wrote/Diagnosis Murder/Poirot is the one who did it.

I think the issue here is more complex than we make out. He said he will be here for another year an I believe he will. I don't think they will replace him, because why should they? He isn't doping too bad and iut is his team. I think it is like thia: - He doesn't want a new contract yet, but wants to agree how we are to proceed from this point on to improve. - If the board are going to contionue to sell the team from ben eath him he'll go at the end of his contract -If the baord don't back up their commitment by giving new contracts to the team, he'll go again at the end -If they don't get his choices for strengthening the squad he'll go - If they don't at least try to keep Mane he'll go. I don't think he's too bothered with Wanyama. - If he's not convinced that the club will put their money where there mouth is, he'll go. If all of these con ditions are met, he'll stay....for another year, until they are no longer being met, or he's got a more interesting job, and he will continue to do this until he goes. So this thread will be a sticky as he'll do the same each year until he's off. So nothign to see at the moment. Next seasons end is the crunch time. And in Rons mind, what he is doing is no big deal, is perfectly acceptable, it's the way he has always doen it, and what's the matter with the fans and media in this country, just have a coke and a smoke and shut the f*** up, it's business as usual.

I also would like a Man Utd win. going through to the group stages removed the hoodoo of meeting a team in qualifications who have a good day against us. Also is it wrong of me to want Rooney to receive a minor injury that is just enough to keep him out of the Euros? Nothing career threatening just enough that the others are given a chance to shine? If it is wrong I'll take it back.

I took my youngest daughter to her first game when she was 5. It was the last game of the season 2004-05 and it was when we were in freefall. My wife asked me why, so I said I wanted to take her before there wasn't a football club left!!!!! She loved it, all of the pagentry of the last day and going on the pitch, and the 'Pie and a Pint' at half time that I told her was tradition, (which meant a Hotdog and Hot Chocolate for her, Coffeee and Pie for me). It was at the time there was that Aviva add on TV with Paul Whitehouse as the Plymouth united fan, and my daughter was singing 'Green Army, Green Army.' She still goes occasionally now, and still enjoys it.

We couldn't have been more spoilt if the Ambassador had given us hos Ferrero Roche!!!!! I watched the match in a Pub near Bradford with a bunch of Scouse supporters. They were quite delusional at the beginning with their claims of a beating for Seville. The comentary was terribly one sided I felt and was more about how Liverpool could get back into it rather than how Seville had countere their tactics in the second half. My comment that coming back from being two goals down is very possible and has been done recently didn't go down well when I followed with.....'...Of course, we had Mane to thank for that.' I tried to watch as a neutral but got a bit fustrated with all of the questioning of the refs calls when awarded against, but calls for cards when awarded for. And as for the claims of time wasting, i'm sorry but if the shoe was on the other foot.......and I had to point out that it could go to 4-1. I can understand the tipicals fans view, but one of them said that they have lost what was rightfully theirs, i felt sick. Didn't normally ahve anything against the Scouse until this season.

He should go to Liverpool. Him and lallana can become mates and spend the weekend ****ting on the little people and the teams that made them.

The only ones I would be interested in are Wijnaldum, Townsend and Ayew. Possibly Jaanmat.