Kadeem Hardison

Coming in and reading this dreadfully dull story last night.

He was on the bench against Swansea and we've only played one other game since then. This forum can sensationalise anything.

There should be a smiley for pulling that face where you put your tongue in front of your bottom teeth and make an "errrrr" sound.

Round our way Cake is called Joss Ackland's Spunky Backpack or Hattie Jaques' Portentious Cheese Wog. One young kiddie on Cake cried all the water out of his body. Just imagine how his mother felt. It's a f*cking disgrace.

You live in LA?

I knew nothing about this until one of my staff didn't come in this morning.

The Thin Red Line is the second worst film I have ever seen at the cinema, behind EPic Movie.

Who is he again?

Collapsed Lung Echobelly Bright Eyes R.E.M. Revolting ****s Lemonheads

The Daily Echo.

I agree. Why aren't we more like Man United? I blame Lowe.

When I was younger, about 11-12, I used to walk to school on my own. About this time I used to run into a couple of boys who were in the year above and they used to bully me and call me names. It wasn't really physical, until this one time when they tried to push me into a bush. One of them had my tie and was pulling it so tight it was strangling me. I started to feel quite faint when I heard this voice behind shout at the lads. I heard one of them hit the ground and start crying and I looked around and the other was running off. The crying lad got up and ran off too. I looked up to see who the stranger was who had saved me and was surprised to see it was none other than Derek Statham. He looked at my tie and said "Tie's broken, kiddo." I looked down and noticed that they had ripped my tie in half. I started to cry, and through my tears I grizzled to Derek Statham that it was school photo day and that I would get into trouble from the teachers and my mum for having a ripped tie. "Not to worry, kiddo," said Derek Statham, and bent down and pulled one of his shoelaces out of his OWN shoes (remember this was back in the eighties when things weren't quite as cheap) and started to pull threads off of it. When he found a thread that was long enough, he then put his hand to his lapel and pulled off (what I think was, although my memory of it is hazy) a Wet Wet Wet pin badge and fashioned some sort of needle out of the back. He then proceeded to sew up my tie until it was as good as new! As I was now running late, I thanked Derek Statham and went on my way. I looked back and could see him walking away unsteadily on one foot as he didn't have any shoelaces in the shoe! What a great bloke. They don't make footballers like that anymore.

To begin with, Ponty's case should never come to trial. The Board has not produced one iota of evidence that the crime Ponty is charged with ever took place... It has relied instead upon the testimony of two witnesses, whose evidence has not only been called into serious question on cross-examination, but has been flatly contradicted by the defendant. Now, there is circumstantial evidence to indicate that alpine saint was beaten as a child - savagely. And Ponty now sits before you having taken the oath with the only good hand he possesses... his RIGHT. I have nothing but pity in my heart for the alpine. He is the victim of emotional poverty and ignorance. But my pity does not extend so far as to him putting a man's moderator status at stake, which he has done in an effort to get rid of his own guilt. Now I say "guilt," gentlemen, because it was guilt that motivated alpine. He's committed no crime - he has merely broken a rigid and time-honored code of our society, a code so severe that whoever breaks it is hounded from our midst as unfit to live with. He must destroy the evidence of his offense. But what was the evidence of his offense? Ponty, a human being. He must put Ponty away from him. Ponty was to him a daily reminder of what he did. Now, what did he do? He tempted a moderator. He was a full troll, and he tempted a moderator. He did something that, in our society, is unspeakable. He teased a moderator. Not an old admin, but a strong, young moderator. No code mattered to him before he broke it, but it came crashing down on him afterwards. The witnesses for the Board, with the exception of the wiltshire saint and Deano6 have presented themselves to you gentlemen, to this court in the cynical confidence that their testimony would not be doubted, confident that you gentlemen would go along with them on the assumption... the evil assumption that all moderators lie, all moderators are basically immoral beings, all moderators are not to be trusted around our forum. An assumption that one associates with minds of their caliber, and which is, in itself, gentlemen, a lie, which I do not need to point out to you. And so, a quiet, humble, respectable moderator, who has had the unmitigated TEMERITY to feel sorry for the forum members, has had to put his word against TWO troll's! The defendant is not guilty - but somebody in this forum is. Now, gentlemen, in this country, our messageboards are the great levelers. In our messageboards, all men are created equal. I'm no idealist to believe firmly in the integrity of our messageboards and of our forums - that's no ideal to me. That is a living, working reality! Now I am confident that you gentlemen will review, without passion, the evidence that you have heard, come to a decision and restore this man to his family. In the name of GOD, do your duty. In the name of God, believe... Ponty.

Just watched Mac and Me on Blu-ray. It is what the format was made for. The detail on the alien, Mac, is incredible. At the end of the film it proclaims "We'll be back!". This must be the most eagerly awaited sequel of all time - it's been over 20 years! Anyone have any news on this sequel?

I agree with this. It seems people are too quick to dismiss this as a false rumour, but I don't see why - it makes perfect sense that Steve Moran would want to save his club. He showed passion when playing for us and there is no reason to think he doesn't still have that passion for Saints. Stevie, we are waiting for you with open arms.

I go for the all day ticket. http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3072/2579327744_7b0454d035.jpg

People shouldn't have to rely on a computer to check their spelling. If the job requires you to prepare documents to a standard, you should really have the skills to do that job in the first place.

I would dedicate more time to going to Pompey away games rather than splitting my time equally between Saints and Pompey 50/50.

I'm confused. Either he is controlling everything right down to team selection or he's never at the club and doesn't do his job. Which is it?

Your sons quite negative too, huh? And at 8 years old. Impressive.

Andrei Kanchelskis.

As Lallana has done precisely nothing in that midfield 'hole' role the last few games, I'd be inclined to put Rudi in there. I'm pretty sure he played there for Hearts when he went on that scoring streak.

New York, drive up through NY state to Buffalo and Niagara, then up the Queen Elizabeth Way to Toronto. Alternatively, NY then Albany followed by Vermont, taking in Ben & Jerry's then over into Montreal (longer drive, mind).

I quite like the applecheeked scamp.

I think there were at least 5,000 marching. And that is a conservative estimate.