ericofarabia

Beat me to it!!

Maybe the owners are going to kick the poisoned little dwarf Davies into touch and get a new manager!!

His must have known it was going to be snowing y'day and was getting in some practice maybe ;-)

Ungroomed Grooming maybe?

How about the 12 public toilets closing to keep one sh!thole open?

Me too!! so plenty of spare cash for the stadium expansion

He's only got 4 days spare, so that's out of the equation

Doh .... so much for posting it as a PM. What a plonker. Feel free to answer via PM!!

Hi matey, Shame there isn't a Saints game on whilst you are here, our little band of Saints fans numbered 18 for the pitiful display v QPR. Who knows there maybe some players out here taking a short break over the blank weekend!! One of the guys works for Hieneken and does a lot of work with The Barasti Bar so manages to get our match on one of the bigger TV screens every week. When are you arriving, Where are you staying? The weather is just warming up, averaging about 30c a day, but seems to be climbing evry day now. Don't seem to do Spring here, last week a bit chilly to sit out at night, now getting too hot!! The Battle of the Waterparks is a close run thing between Wild Wadi and Aqua Adventure at The Atlantis on The Palm. Probably more variations on slides etc at AA if you are into that sort of thing. WW has more lazy river type things. You really should think about skiing whilst you are here. About 30 quid gets you all equipment hire (except gloves and hat, but I could lend you some) and 2 hours on the slopes) have an apres ski beer then head down to the beach for a spot of sunbathing and sundowners. Really is a unique experience!! A lot of people say go to The Burj Khalifa, but I'm pretty sure you are more than used to getting a birds eye view of things to be excited by that. Not done it myself, but the viewing deck is only 2/3rds of the way up, involves loads of queuing and if its dusty you see rock all anyway. You have to book up weeks in advance to get a sunset timing as well. Depending how touristy you want to be, a desert safari (a bit of dune bashing, belly dancing and very basic supper out in the stars) is popular. A trip in a dhow at sunset along the creek at sunset is also ok, cheap and cheerful!! The Dancing Fountains choregraphed to music outside the Dubai Mall is very impressive indeed and can be viewed from the terraces of a few different restuarants. At the other end of the spectrum a visit to Ravi's (a Dubai institution) Curry house (extremely cheap and cheerful) and then a few seedy bars culminating at Sea View which is knee deep in ladies of the night but also hosts the best rock band in town, if that is your cup of tea could be arranged!! Also a hedonistic Friday Brunch, the better ones inc. bubbly can set you back about 80 quid, but are basically a race against time to drink as much as possible, maybe even eat something and then move on to a bar somewhere and hopefully not end up ****ging on the beach and featuring in the next weekend's News of The World etc!! I'm off for a couple of days from the 20th (although will be busily catching up on all those things that I was meant to have done over the last few weeks but haven't got around to doing, before my wife and daughter and friend arrive here for a few weeks!!) We will most definitely have to meet up for a few beers etc. Meanwhile http://www.timeoutdubai.com/ will give you an idea on just how many bars and restuarants there are here!! Phil is away at the moment in Uk ( Norwich!!) and Poland and not much access to Innernet whilst travelling about but should be back after the weekend. Let me know if there's anything else you need to know. Cheers, Eric

Shame there isn't a Saints game on the weekend you are here, The DubaiSaints numbers are growing by the week and meet up at Barasti Bar which isn't a bad place to go for sundowners. I'll PM you.

A primary teacher in Portsea explains to her class that she is a Portsmuff fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they too, are Portsmuff fans. Everyone in the class raises their hand except one little girl. The teacher looks at the girl with surprise and says, "Mary, why didn't you raise your hand? " "Because I'm not a Portsmuff fan, " she replied. The teacher, still shocked, asked, "Well if you are not a Portsmuff fan, then who are you a fan of? " "I am a Southampton fan and proud of it, " Mary replied. The teacher could not believe her ears. "Mary, why pray tell, are you a Southampton fan? " "Because my mum is a Saints fan, and my dad is a Saints fan, so I'm a Saints fan too!" "Well, " said the teacher in an obviously annoyed tone, "that is no reason for you to be a Southampton fan. You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time. What if your mum was a pox ridden prostitute and your dad was an illiterate unemployed chavvy drug addict, what would you be then? " Mary smiled, and said "then I'd be a Portsmuff fan. "

3 blokes in a prison cell bemoaning they bad luck when it came to sentencing in court. 1st bloke from Liverpool says, i got 5 years for stealing some hub caps off a car. Just my bad luck I was wearing my Liverpool shirt in court and the judge was a bloody blue nosed Everton fan. 2nd bloke from Manchester, pipes up and says bah you think you were treated badly, I got 10 years for holding up a newsagents armed only with a kiddies toy gun and got away with a fiver and some jazz mags. Like you I was unfortunately wearing my Man U shirt in court and the judge was a Blue Mooning City fan. Finally the pathetic looking saddo in the corner wearing a Skatesmuff shirt says, I got 15 years for riding my bicycle without lights, and the Southampton supporting judge says I should be thankful for that, as I would have got 20 years if it had been at night

Top 5 Musical "5"s 1/ Take Five - Dave Brubeck Group - great lay back and chill tune 2/ Five get over-excited - HouseMartins. Such a Fun Fun Fun song 3/ 5.15 - The Who 4/ Kick out The Jams Mo Fo's - MC 5's 5/ 5 minutes - The Stranglers

To make it even more baffling Webb then instructed Gaston to pass it back to their keeper, even though we were on the attack and our player was taken out of the game whilst running onto a pass. WTF was that about.

Damn .... it wasn't just a bad dream then.

Me and Phil sent them all Text's pretending to be Redkrap saying that they had permisssion to all go out on the lash each night. Luckily they are all so dumb, they forgot that arry can't do texts and didn't spot the lack of spelling or punctuation errors They sound like a right bunch of mercenaries who couldn't give a toss about QPR except their wages. Please humiliate them today Saints. No Mercy.

All you need to know - Next time you go out for a meal as the wine waiter if he has a Semi On (The LL's oare silent)

I picked a good week not to go to Barasti it seems. Mind you I wouldn't have recognised any of the talentless feckwits anyway. To think they were in the same bar where @DubaiSaints will be watching us thrash them later on today. FAF.

As with many posts expressing the concern that he was only playing for a contract ..... I'm tending towards disagreeing with this now. In the past I have been very disappointed in him, but credit due he has knuckled down and turned things around. He has always wanted to play Prem League and must now realise anything short of his best will see him dropped and I really don't think that's where he wants to be now. He is thriving on playing with good players against good opposition and sitting on the bench just won't satisfy him anymore in my mind. He loves being involved and hopefully he'll feel the need to justify the new contract and try even harder to keep his place.

Looks like Bin Haim is missing tomorrows game due to a hip injury. Shame we could have given him a heroes welcome for his part in fleecing Skatesmuff for a few years. Pity he backed down in the end on his demands. Has he been paid any of his outstanding money - ha ha silly question really!!

Doesn't this site have Copyright on TSW? This could all get very confusing!!

Stinky Cheeses. Stlton, Gorgonzola, Roquefort, St Agur, Reblochon amongst others. The added attraction that they are always accompanied by a Bottle of red Wine or Port also helps !!!

Luke Shaw fo'sure. He's still too young to buy any jizz mags