Whitey Grandad

It's rude, that's why

Do you really think he has that amount of cash sitting in a bank?

Why have you youngsters got to change everything all the time? If you’re that bored I’ve got a few research projects that will keep you busy.

Indeed. These things can't be rushed.

Some girl you know?

Smart motorways why?

Leave it alone. You can’t improve on perfection

If it doesn’t work then just suck it out and squirt it back in again.

That’s the answer to everything.

Low Glycaemic Index. Good for diabetics. Unfortunately in my case it reacts with the Metformin tablets to give excruciating squirts,

Indeed so. He’s a battering ram that breaks up the defensive formation. It disturbs their shape and creates opportunities for others. Much better than our ponderous efforts of recent years.

Carrie on Governing

I’ve seen that bride thing. How many screens did you work through before you gave up?

The ‘Just Eat’ adverts. Horrible noise.

When I was a boy it was just a pile of stones in a field. You had to park in the lane and climb over a wire fence. You could climb all over the stones too. Then the hippies and neo-druids started getting interested.

It was mentioned in The Times this morning. "test and trace shake-up to cut down on nuisance calls"

We can never know what they went through. As the saying goes, "Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes"

Careful! That's no way to talk about the love of his life. Keep your pecker up badger. i hope all goes well for you :0

There is a postscript to this story. Some thirty years ago my younger sister was involved in county athletics and one day called into a local athletics cub. There was a man behind the reception desk and she noticed that his surname was the same as our family. She told him that it was her maiden name and they chatted and soon established that our families were from the same area of Ponders End in north London. Then he asked her if she knew anything about his father. He had no photographs, no mementos, nothing at all because his father had been killed in the First World War when he was just a toddler. The following day she went back to see him again and saying "I've got something for you" she handed him the letter that his father had written in the trenches over seventy years before. My dad said that he realised then why he had kept that letter for all those years.

My father was the youngest of his family yet when his father Ben was old and needed care it was my parents who looked after him. When he died in 1951 he left precious few posessions yet amongst them was a single letter, written in pencil on flimsy notepaper and sent to him by his younger brother Albert from the trenches in Northern France. My father couldn't bring himself to throw it away. This is the letter: ------------------------------------------ Dear Ben¹ & Lizzie It gives me much pleasure to write to you these few lines to thank you for the parcel. That came as a god send you cannot imagine what it means to get some clean food at such a time as I received yours. We were laying at an old factory when we got the order to move and our hearts sank to our boots, for it was raining hard and we knew we had a long way to go. We were marching for 11 hrs in a rain and snow storm and when we got to the trench it was up to the knees in mud and water -and it snowed all that night, we had no shelter whatever so you can guess what a terrible night we had. We stopped there all the next day. Then we were told to get ready to go over the top, 'another bit of luck,' we thought. Well, the time came and over we went, and over came fritz's shells but we carried on and on straight across to fritz's trenches, through them and over a railway line, over his gun pits which were built of concrete and into a village the other side, where we had to dig in. We stopped there for two days, then we were releived and came back to the railway line and we made shelter as best we could from the rain and also from the shells. That was where I was when your parcel came, so you can see how it was welcomed after dragging your food for about two mile through the mud you have not got much of an appetite for that for you have to have it in a sand bag and strung round your neck, and it is never in the best of condition in fine weather let alone the wet. Well there was four of us in the shelter and I was asleep when it came and they played a joke on me by dangling it from the top of the shelter, so when I woke I got the surprise at full strength and I can tell you I did! I layed looking at it a second or two wondering if I was awake or not, so you can tell what a god send that was to us. The others set about making a fire and getting some water and we all enjoyed that meal greatly and I have to thank you for them. I found the shilling alright, atleast my pall did in the sweets, and I was telling them that your boy was here when I had a letter come that is for Ben², so as it's addressed for the 23rd³ I will keep it as we are expecting a new draft and he may be in it, so when you write give me his proper address so that if he is not in the draft I can send it direct, otherwise he might never get it. Well I think this is all at present, except I have been very lucky up till now not being hit yet. I have only one pal left that came from Dover with me in my squad, the other poor chaps have gone under. So must close with all best wishes from Albert ------------------------------------------ His last few words have a sad poignancy. Eleven days after he wrote these words Albert and the 660 other members of his battalion lined up in no man's land at 03:45 in the early morning and attacked the German trenches just to the north of the village of Oppy. He never returned. Battalion casualties were 7 officers and 122 'other ranks'. He has no known grave and is most probably still lying out there in the one of the vast, featureless fields of the area. Albert married on the 8th October 1905. They had five daughters before at last Jenny had a boy Sidney on 3rd October 1915. We don't know how much time Albert had with his little son before he went to France and was killed before his son was two years old. (1) Ben & Lizzie were my grandparents, Benjamin and Elizabeth. (2) The letter 'that is for Ben' was for their eldest son, my uncle, also called Benjamin. He was 22 years old at the time that the letter was written. (3) the 23rd refers to the 23rd Battalion, The Royal Fusiliers in which Ben and Albert served. Young Ben was wounded twice during the war. Once when he was out in No-Man's-Land mending wire fences when a flare was sent up. Instead of flinging themselves to the ground as they had been taught he just stood there frozen. A german machine gun swept low across the ground and hit him in the leg. If he had been lying there as he had been trained then he would probably have been killed. On another occasion although they had orders not to talk he turned to say something to the pal to his side when a bullet went into his mouth between his teeth and out through his cheek. My father said that he carried a red mark on his cheek for the rest of his life. On the occasion of Armistice Day we can spend a few moments in quite contemplation of the unbelievable devotion, sacrifice and achievements of this generation. They did what they accepted as their duty with never a complaint and never a grumble. Will we ever see their like again?

Did you think that up all on your own or did you just copy and paste it her because you like to show off?

Not in America it isn’t. American English is a different variant of English and contains many spellings, words and idioms unique to them.

No, the only reason we are in this situation is a misreadong of the figures. We cannot and should not lead our lives by thinking of the NHS in everything we do. We should all take care of our own health as much as possible. Out of interest, do you believe everything that comes out of the Government?

It’s not the job of the public to protect the NHS. Quite the reverse.

The images don’t show Bamford as offside with any certainty. Too much error there to give a clear decision.