Whitey Grandad

I did and I wasn't even sitting on a toilet I enjoyed both wins but this was more comprehensive, even if it was against a poorer team.

It certainly looked that way on television, but it's not the first time I've seen this happen.

Exactly. He had to leave his feet planted where Stekelenburg would arrive but of course his momentum kept him going forward so he ends up doing a classic dive. If anybody is still in any doubt then watch it again and see what Falcao does with his left foot, the blue one. He makes no attempt to put it forward for his next natural step.

Which linesman would that have been? They were both half a pitch away.

Yes, the attacker can't just 'engineer' a contact.

No. The attacker wasn't cleaned out by the keeper. Was it 'a trip or attempt to trip'? Of course not. The attacker must make some attempt to avoid the challenge but he just dived into it. It was a classic dive, and the referee agreed with me.

??? Nowhere near a penalty and rightly booked for it. Tucks both feet together and makes not attempt to keep running. 8.0 for artistic merit.

Stellar, I'd say

Their claim was never a penalty so he has nothing to complain about. Falcao was rightly booked for his dive. Mourinho is just making himself look foolish.

The return of Bertrand and the arrival of VVD have made a big difference.

We are a top top club

Shame about the clean sheet but anybody can fluke one

Never in doubt

They don't watch any highlights at half time but I wouldn't be surprised if somebody let them know.

I always adopt that approach. I find it the safest.

Meal

I watched some of their match on BT Sports last night. Some of the comments from Michael Owen were cringeworthy. All about what a big night it was for the opposition to be playing at Anfield and what an honour it was that Liverpool even deigned to play against them. Listening to him you'd think they were playing at Fratton Park.

Fontana

I blame Obama.

Donkey

Ever thought of giving it a go yourself?

I was told the Great Britain was the big island, the one on which I happen to live. Geographically all the rest are the British Isles, if not politically. Little Britain is now called Brittany.

Most people use a racket.

Grass

Not necessarily. He doesn't say what 'she would love him to...'