Greenridge

He was clearly talking in a generic sense of recent weeks. Your polar view to Alpine that everything is rosey and the club can do, and never do, anything slightly below par is just as ridiculous as his view that everything is dire. There is middle ground you realise.

According to Koeman then Vic is not mentally fit to play. Try turning that into a positive spin.

They've already left.

You think his team selection, tactics and post-match assessment were all OK?

They had to be instructed to do that so you may want to fine someone higher up the tree.

It's all about supply and demand. I think the market price on the ticket has just gone the way if the Chinese stock market.

I've got arc-eye from the cameraman following our latest hoof along the floodlight roofline. I'm going to sue.

I wonder if he just might have squeezed in that team ahead of, well, the whole of the midfield and defence?

Martina is, err, interesting.

Seems Fat Sam has offered more than just transfer advice to Ronald. He's given him some tips on tactics too.

That's not exactly going out on a limb considering the date.

He looked well enough when winning the javelin gold yesterday. He's moonlighting.

Les and Ron said no one else was leaving in this transfer window. So Vic must be ill. I think.

Seems he doesn't like to jump too much for defensive headers from corners. Cough.

Is it fact that Cedric didn't play due to his height? Did RK confirm this? Martina is a 6' RB. Is he injured or what's the score there?

At the moment the CB's are not getting the defensive cover from midfield that they've enjoyed in the past. See Toby's comments. So Caulker may well have to accept that 'our way of playing' this year will be different to previous. He's also carrying some extra timber but that will no doubt be shifted now he's settled with us. I guess the uncertainty of where /what he'd be doing in pre-season hasn't helped in that respect. If we get VvD then I can't see him featuring much anyway but let's see.

If Targett isn't ready we could have had Yoshida at LB and Soares at RB. Do we know why or 1st choice RB didn't play?

Going to bid and fighting off an actual bid are pretty different. Would have made for an interesting medical / insurance I guess.

Who was going to sign crocked JRod last year?

We tried that last year.

It's that time in the transfer window....

Don't worry. Whitey Grandad and sadoldgit will be along soon to put a positive spin on things.

So what's the conclusion on this story? Reporter fantasy / agent meddling / complete untruth / some element of truth?

#WeLimpOn