Dark Munster

Well, while our pantomime villain is certainly good for a barrel of laughs, the not-so-good ship Cheats FC is more than capable of keeping us all entertained and amused all by itself, as it careers into one massive iceberg after another. There's plenty of life (and laughs) in this thread for quite some time, I think. Once the final parachute payment has been extracted by the vultures keeping it on life support, the decrepit, cesspit of a club will finally sink below the waves. And this classic thread will only finally wind down after Cheats FC gets what it deserves ... and we've all finished dancing on its grave.

Poor old Corpse, scraping the bottom of the barrel. Understandable I suppose, considering the impending doom for Cheats FC.

In other words, they are the best seats in the shithole.

I think the CSI creditors (particularly the Lithuanians who lost their pensions and life savings) may have some more colourful words to describe Cheats FC getting proceeds of a sale of CSI's assets. Isn't it about time for Admin Andy to start wearing a ridiculous blue and white chequered hat and carry a bell?

I agree. If only Saints had strengthened in early June we'd be top now, rather than languishing around 17th. Oh.

Certainly better than the 4-0 defeat you predicted.

Oi, Phil, any Greeks reading this thread are likely to be very offended.

Hmm, Corpse is getting a tad tetchy. I can't think why.

Well, they certainly won't go beyond those 2 years, f'sure. The remaining parachute payments are the only reason Chinny and company are keeping the cesspit of a club on life support.

Cheats 1 Saints 4

It looks like he can afford to lend the Cheats some desperately needed money. But then again, I'm sure he's not as thick as Voldemort's players.

I notice there is one vote for for Fourpast. I didn't know he subscribed to TSW.

Using your "logic" Bernie Madoff was also not insolvent, until his corrupt setup similarly collapsed.

And, very possibly, not many from the current first team either. The transfer window opens on January 1, and the match is about a week later. I wonder how many players Chinny can offload next month, as he begins flogging off as much of Cheats FC as possible before finally tossing out the rotten corpse? You have to admire Chinny's tricks in keeping the cesspit of a club on life support long enough before the final parachute payment is received. Getting some Russian crooks (allegedly) to keep it running for a while on filthy, stolen pension money was a masterstroke. And now back comes the android. Who said this thread was dead? They must be having a laugh.

I wonder if it will be televised?

Simple, they don't pay. The Cheats are very good at that.

Actually, if a top 2 finish is the priority, maybe a Hammers win wouldn't be so bad?

Blimey, I go away for a couple of days, and come back to the thread which is now longer than a Stephen King novel (and more scary - for the few). I'm glad I'm not attending a funeral in the foreseeable future - it would be hard to keep a straight face while my thoughts keep going back to the plight of the Cheats. Anyway, to any skates reading this thread, don't despair. You may have lost Vladimir Aintgotapenny, but at least you've still got Roman Dubious. He certainly looks much more honest than Vlad. I know I wouldn't hesitate to buy a used car from him. But seriously, I never understood why they would not have one, but two dodgy owners. But now I do. It was so they could have a spare one in case the other got nicked. You have to admire their foresight.

I think you'll find that's the sound of the time bomb about to explode.

Maybe the "utter nutjobs" shurlock is referring to are our resident Skates PFC123 and Corpse Whore? I certainly hope so, otherwise I am terribly offended.

If it's a physical check up, I wonder if it'll include counting their fingers? That could take a long time.

"If I wear the same glasses and have the same hairstyle as Alex Ferguson, I can be as successful as him." He may have not actually said that.