Arizona

I liked the idea Lua Lua had a few years ago when the doctor told him he had to stop doing flips for a while. Said he was going to take off his shirt and swing it round his head, but have an identical shirt on underneath, just to see if he would get booked or not. More original than the shhhh or rocking the baby, which also gets on my tits. I wish someone would do it one day and then drop kick the imaginary baby into the crowd, just to see the s**t hit the fan in the tabloids.

Same way i celebrate any Saints win. Passing electric currents through small animals.

Only a mother could love that thing.

'Further doubts are cast over Skacel's commitment to the club as he turns up for the Sheffield Utd match a whole day late.' As a slight aside, is there actually any rule against building snowmen on the pitch? I was thinking maybe an extra couple of goalies wouldn't go amiss, and perhaps a striker with a bit more work rate than McGoaldrought.

And Morgan Anderton actually being fit to play for once...

What I am saying is; Surman, Davis, Lallana and Saga staying isn't good news. It isn't even news at all. At any sensibly run club I would expect those players to stay because without them relegation would be a virtual certainty, as opposed to the odds on for the drop situation we are in at the moment. It isn't good news, it just looks good because there is so much sh*t news around. I not some retard who hates Lowe in some twisted way because they stayed. However I am not going to afford him any praise for it either.

Whoop-de-f**king-do!!! The only players we have left who are remotely close to being CCC quality are still here. I guess that's all you need in a chairman. He may have made 3 terrible managerial decisions in 8 months, sold all the other experienced players, failed to find investment of any kind, alienated most of the fans base, divided the boardroom, interfered in team selection and tried to force the remaining senior players out the squad, but hey we've still got Adam Lallana! A striker-come-winger who I haven't seen put in a decent cross or shot since the dawn of time.

And by the way, NOBODY was excited when Pearson achieved 2 points from 3 games. It wasn't until we got a couple of wins, became hard to beat and avoided relegation that people really began to like him. Wotte has yet to achieve any of these things. Add to that Pearson always seemed to pick a team based on merit and players in form. The likes of Surman and BWP were dropped after a few poor showings and players who had been frozen out by Burley, such as Licka, came in a put in some good performances. Wotte is so far sticking religiously to a strategy which isn't working and refuses to drop players like DMG, who it seems would still get a game if he picked the ball up and shoved it up his rectum everytime someone passed to him.

Check the match report for the Plymouth game. It says Pearson was 'nominally' in charge, but the team had already been picked by someone in the previous regime. Whereas Pearson took over a team which was flying high and scoring for fun after suffering their 5th defeat in a row at the hands of the mighty Bristol Rovers. That guy had it on a plate. And yes three wins would change things. As would Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking Lowe into another dimension, Saints signing Kaka or Paul Allen wandering into town.

I saw him in the reserves once and he was really quite phenomenally average. Just to give you a bit of an idea, this was in a game where James looked imense at RB, Kyle Davies solid at CB, Gasmi looked a bit useful on the left and Robertson scored a brace.

After a promisingish start to Wotte's management, a 3-1 defeat. DMG to score.

I am 99% sure that Skacel wont play and 99% sure that if he does, he will be at LB with Surman at LM. As it happens I think we will line up with: - - - - - - Davis James - Perry - Size - Surman - - - - - - Wotton - - - - - - - - - Lallana - Gillett - Gobern - - - - - - - DMG - - - Saga - - - - Not entirely sure about Gillett and Gobern. It could really be any 2 from Gillett, Gobern, Smith, Morgan or Surman, if Fish plays LB. If it were me I'd go with - - - - - - - Davis - - - - - - - James - - Perry - - Size - - Mills Lallana - Wotton - Gillett - Surman - - - - - - - - - - Skacel - - - - - - - - - - Saga - - - - - - - - - - -

It seems this guy has quite a few hard core fans... Let's see if anyone gets that reference...

Well, we knocked 5 past him in a friendly, without Saganowski, so he can only be good. Welcome aboard!

Good. Now stop p*ssing him around, play him on the left wing and see how many Saga can score with some decent service.

A Team: Flowers Monkou Ekelund Moran Beattie B Team Jones Ruddock Oakley Shearer Osgood

Whiskey George used to come on here and vote for Euell last season. Would be interesting to know if any Saints players do read this forum from time to time. I heard Prutts used to every now and then and I am actually Jermaine Wright. If any Saints players are reading this, please confirm by attempting an overhead bicycle kick from the halfway line against the Blades on Tuesday. Thanks.

Sadly I think as poor as Pompey are, Middlesborough, West Brom and Stoke are too poor to overhall them. Of course I'd go mental if Beattie scored the goals to keep Stoke up at the Skate's expense. Can you imagine...

He stays, gets back into the team and scores a 30 yard screamer in inury time to keep us up on the last day of the season. Monday, 1700, Dynamo Kiev. FWIW I think it's an incredibly sad situation with Rudi. The club seem to be doing everything possible to make him not want to be here, then making it look like it's his fault and he doesn't give a sh*t. I saw him in training a couple of months back and it was completely at odds with the image the club are trying to portray. Him and Morgan were out 15 mins before the rest warming up. When training did start, Rudi and BWP stuck out as being real characters and on the training pitch at least Skacel was a class above any of the others. I can only imagine how much better off we'd be if we'd started the season playing 4-4-2, with Skacel on the left wing and Raz and Saga up front. It wasn't even beyond the realms of financial possibility, but still the club go and f**k it up beyond all recognition. Good luck Rudi, wherever you end up.

Police investigate the lightening quick theft of Mark Wotte's cigar.

If Saga plays every minute of every game for the rest of the season and doesn't score again, he will still have been more prolific than DMG has been thus far.

Nothing to do with being replaced by Lee f**king Molyneux then?

Will prove difficult, as the club's apparent tactic is to p*ss players off to the point they don't want to be here, rather than putting them on the transfer list and accepting their decision if they chose to stay. Better PR for the club. Loving Motte telling the OS, "If anyone is not 100% committed to SFC, I don't want them to play for us." I just have this vision of the warden at Guantanamo bay saying the same thing.

TBF, Rupert Lowe is probably quite heavy.

If he gets our next goal, he will match McGoalkick's scoring tally from open play in the CCC this season. Not sure if that says more about him or DMG TBH.