benjii

Absolutely agree - it has to be Hoddle.

God, I had an anus horibilis the other morning. I don't know what they put in that curry but it didn't hang around.

forget the faux-annoyance of some **** at The Sun... forget the Plymouth Argus... forget not being able to ram a filthy thermo-nuclear pie down your cake hole... forget not being given interest free payment options (and having to arrange one yourself)... forget match-day increases (not the only club, by the way)... forget booking fees... hell, even forget masterminding the entire resurrection of the club if you want... no, I'll tell you what Cortese's biggest mistake has been: Overestimating the intelligence of our fan base. Clearly Cortese thinks we're sensible human beings. People who appreciate that things are seldom black and white. People who realise that you can't make an omelette without breaking some eggs. People who appreciate the complexities of life. People who understand that instant gratification is not available to everyone, and certainly not for free. What one of his advisors needs to do is take him to one side, and have a quiet word: "Nicola, many of these people are simple folk. They lack emotional maturity. They look for any excuse to get outraged. They need to feel part of something, as they are a bit empty. They have limited intellectual capacity for patience. They like to moan about a lack of success or ambition, yet woe-betide anyone who dares to exhibit a modicum of either. They like to be debased by anodyne platitudes and spoon-fed sickly pastry-pouches of attention. They want the best, for the least. They hate footballers, football, the Premier League, the opposition, the opposition fans, the ref, yet they want them all in abundance - the more consumable and digestible the better; they want to swallow it all, **** it out and eat it again with sugar on top. Just feed them a few lines now and again - they will lap it up".

It's mental betting on something that is wholly within the control of a decision maker really. Qualitatively different to betting on a match, for example. Indeed! Tease... come on, let's have an ITK hint then. Just for fun. Good point. Murdoch, ****? Yeah, probably! So it's not Carlton Palmer?

Obviously there will be a contingent of morons (there usually is) acting like morons (they usually do) in the Northam stand (where they hang out). Most sensibly minded fans (there are usually plenty there) will wait until the situation is resolved before deciding whether or not persecution is the way forward.

Mental IMO. Coleman, Hoddle, Southgate or Shearer ahead of Mowbray? Yep, just mental!

Not necessarily. Dickson was excellent yesterday and Chamberlain has the potential to provide cover on the right, enabling Puncheon to play left if needed. It's not ideal but we don't suddenly have a crisis if Lallana is out for a while.

Hardly. We had bucketfulls of chances in both matches. Add that to beating Bournemouth and outplaying Bolton's second string and it's clear we're not being contained in the slightest.

"Well done, Professor" would be better.

Exactly right. What does the country need to do - cut public spending. Who benefits the most from public spending - the "poor". Therefore who is, correctly and justifiably, going to be "hit" hardest - the "poor". No more Sky Sports, bookies and fags. That last bit was a joke. I know most people are responsible and brilliant and hard-working. It was a joke, just a joke. Seriously though, the main problem facing the country is over-spending. It is inevitable, natural and sensible that those who benefit the most from this spending will lose out a bit. And if you're going to say "why should the poor pay for the bankers' mistakes?", then it (notwithstanding whether it's a silly question or not) is just as valid to ask "why should the rich.."? One is no fairer than the other (most "rich" are not bankers, never will be and had nothing to do with any bad banking practice) and there is, frankly, a logical disconnect there anyway.

Why do people assume that if a striker fails to score he, or indeed the team, must have a confidence problem? It doesn't follow. It might be the case but there's no evidence to suggest that at the moment, in fact the contrary is true. The reason we've only scored one goal in the last two matches is down to misses, mistakes and good goalkeeping. Simple as that. We've been "unlucky" in as much as a few players have committed these mistakes at the same time (for example, Lambert missing a fairly easy header on the same day Barnard hit the post twice and Orient's keeper had a blinder). It is quite clear, however, from our ever improving performances that confidence is not an issue. Barnard's performance against Orient was one of the most confident I've seen from him since he joined us. Some of our play was superb at times. We couldn't have played the way we did without confidence. Granted, if we continue to fail to win then confidence might become a problem but it's not at the moment. Based on our play we could have won our last two matches and scored five or six goals in the process and no one would have thought it unjust or undeserved. Thankfully our team and manager have sufficient backbone and emotional maturity (unlike some of our fans) not to naval gaze or throw the toys out of the pram after a couple of annoying results.

I saw some Villa fans hanging around near where the Dell used to be the year after we moved to SMS Tartan - just telling it how it happened. All stereotypes were well and truly reinforced that day. 'Twas just like the Hovis advert.

Maybe he was going to deliver a tracksuit to WGS's house as well? Or King Kev? Or Cosimo Sarli? God, I'm excited.

Saints legend! This article is worth a read too: http://swissramble.blogspot.com/2010/01/harrys-game.html

As always, the idiots have been proven to be idiots.

Some funny characters round Hills+brough way. We walked up a big hill last time I went there (it was raining, obviously, being the north), and popped into a pub about half way up to catch the early footy on the telly. "Skkkkyyyy spoooorrtts??? Nooo, don't 'ave it". Ok, toodle-pip. Goodluck with the evolution. Got to a pub at the top of the hill which was fine. Rammed full of Saints by 14:00. Some people had obviously had a wee bit too much to drink. Included in this category was a lad in red and white striped Saints shirt (in common with many others) who decided to ask the barmaid for directions back to the stadium. Off she went, "yar gooo ooopppp here, and tek a riiigghhhte theerre... etc". She was talking complete rubbish so I interrupted and told the guy that actually you just walk down the hill and you'll come to the ground eventually. I asked her what she was directing him to and she said, "Ahhh thought yerr were talking about't'shopping centrrrreee". Not the brightest.

- what a nobber!

Given that any "Plan" will end with "player kicks/heads ball into net" and is essentially about how to get in those positions; given that we got in loads of those positions; given that a few players failed to kick/head the ball into the net; it is clear manifest poop, smelly mushy poop, to ejaculate forth, on and on, about plans, tactics, the right signings (unless you think Lambert and Barnard are no good at scoring in League One) etc. The plan worked fine. In the first half we played some of the best football I've seen us play for ages and created loads of chances. We also had loads in the second half. Lambert should've scored with a header. Barnard hit the post twice. Their keeper made two or three top-class saves. Harding missed a sitter. Yep, get a new plan. One that says "don't miss sitters and try and make the opposition's goalie play bad - maybe slag off his mum or something in the tunnel or sommit?". Yep, that's what we need. Our brilliant new plan. What next from the planners? Probably move on to criticising a lack of "passion" or "effort". That's the inevitable default resort of the clueless whinger. Oh and FF. Wowsers. CEO and scouting team have a say in who we sign!? Well **** me up the arse with a fire extinguisher! There's a Machiavellian intrigue if ever I heard of one. Keep em' coming. I'd be interested in finding out if the groundsman's involved in pitch maintenance - got any insights? Cheers ol' bean.

That's not clear at all. Actually we're better as we have improved at right back and the rest of the team is the same. I'm just glad our management and players have more bottle than many of our fans.

Javier do Prado?

Never heard of him but he sounds good and if we don't sign him I'll go crazy ape ****.

Disagree completely. We all know that Markus is not the kind to brag about putting £x million in trust. I've got no idea why you interpret the statement that way. On a pure commercial level, taking the analysis away from Markus, the man, it would also be folly to declare "we have £50m in trust". It would be just stupid. Let's just take this at face value. Cortese wants to continue. The Liebherr family want to see his vision realised. Between them they have billions of pounds. Even if they don't want to plough money in directly we now have a stable set-up and unencumbered asset base that would be the envy of 90% of clubs. The statement is 100% positive. Thank you again, Markus. Thank you so much.

Basically all the drama queens were talking ****e and things will turn out fine. Who'd'a'thought it. Quelle surprise.

27% of grades were at least an A or better. Utterly silly. Well done though.