Grey Crab

That's because you are a nerd.

Roland on the Ropes/Roland in the Caves.

Parappa the Rapper.

Whenever I message hypochondriac on Grindr, he always replies within 2-3 minutes.

They are helping out with Operation Yewtree. Apparently they have a house in Bitterne under surveillance.

An "ordinary" season? F*ck off. We've made plenty of progress on last season.

We WILL win this now. They will regret taking Charlie Adam off.

Look at this beauty. Now THAT is Portsmouth's heritage. http://www.wearedorothy.com/shop/lost-destination-tricorn-centre

You do know that the internet has actual porn?

The porn was on page 383 on Teletext.

Just out of interest SaintsWebbers, how can a team play sh*t but manage to get 65% possession in a Premier League game?

I love reading threads like these where Barry just keeps trying and trying and trying and doesn't give up.

It's amazing how much time you spend on here with people you have such disdain for. Is it the only place you can feel a sense of superiority? (Sales is tough job, so there's no shame if you're not up to top standard salesmen like StuRomseySaint)

Exactly. What is wrong with these people? St. Mary's Stadium has been called St. Mary's Stadium since way back in 2001. We owe to the people who built the stadium to honour the name they gave it, may they all rest in peace. My great great grandad used to tell me the story about how he went along to the first game at the St. Mary's Stadium and how they all used to drink a thing called Bovril and eat KitKats - before they were chunky (unbelievable that back in the early days of St. Mary's, way back in history, KitKats were tiny little things! Amazing what they had to put up with back in historical times). People need to get a grip about this - we can't change 13 years of history and change the name of the stadium. It'd be mental to do that.

I when I say the right price, I'm not paying you any more than £10 and I will insist on taking you in my mouth.

I am available to give half-time and full-time massages. I will do extras at the right price.

There's always someone who wants to have a moan, isn't there? Why don't you stop trying to belittle Clyne's achievement and congratulate him instead?

So it was the council that decided the club should buy a stadium rather than spend money on players? I didn't know about this - thanks Roger! What a bloody brilliant council we have. I bet other cities don't have such brilliant councils as ours that has the foresight and power to make decisions for the better of their local football clubs. Fair play to SCC.

When I smoked (about 15 years in), I did one of those tests on lung capacity at the behest of a couple of underwater hockey players (not a euphemism, apparently you have to hold your breath and stay underwater chasing a puck along the bottom of the pool) who were showing off (in front of some girls, I should add) about how great their lung capacity was. I did no exercise and smoked but my stats turned out better than theirs. I didn't milk the moment, just walked off with them looking sheepish. Not sure that girls are that interested in lung capacity in a prospective mate, anyway.

This is great news! Well done Nathaniel - fully deserved.

We should give Osvaldo a run out.

More bullsh*t.

If all the players aren't happy with this, I don't see how we can continue to play as team. We can't have a divided team. I say we sell them all and build an entirely new squad around Osvaldo.

Yep. He was terrible. If he were any good we'd be in the top half of the Premier League now, rather than being sat in League Two as we currently do.

She copied and pasted that from SISU. That's the EXACT same open letter they wrote to Coventry fans when they took over.