SNSUN

There are some crackers, I used to have to sing lots of them every day of the week way back when, but one of my favourites (and actually one of my favourite tunes of all time, old or modern) is Morning Has Broken. Then there's other godduns like I Vow To Thee, All Things Bright And Beautiful and For Those in Peril On The Sea.

Anal itching may be just an annoyance, or may be so troublesome that it dominates your life. It is usually made worse by warmth, and is often most troublesome in bed. The skin round the anus easily becomes irritated and inflamed. This is because it is difficult to keep the area round the anus clean and dry; the skin is crinkly and traps tiny faecal particles. It is also sweaty and airless, and it may be moist from an anal or vaginal discharge. When it becomes irritated, scratching is a natural reaction, but this damages the skin further – the itch/scratch cycle. Ointments and creams can cause further problems by keeping the area damp. Although it is very unpleasant, anal itching seldom means anything serious. Washing too much or not enough. Poor hygiene can be responsible for anal itching, but so can excessive cleaning, especially if you use harsh soaps or a brush. How you can help yourself Wash the anal area after you have had your bowels open, but not more than three times in a day, using an unperfumed soap and water. Some doctors recommend using aqueous cream (available from pharmacies) as a cleanser. Apply the cream, massage it gently over the area and then rinse off. If you are somewhere where you cannot wash, clean the area with wet tissues (but not with pre-moistened wipes). If you use shower gel to wash your body, make sure you rinse it off very thoroughly so that none remains between the buttocks. Dab gently with a soft towel to dry – do not rub. If drying is difficult, use a hairdryer on cool setting. Do not put any disinfectant on the skin or in the bath water – this can irritate the skin. Do not use bubble bath – the perfume can irritate. Instead, put a handful of kitchen salt in your bath. Keep a cotton-wool ball, dusted with powder, against the anus, inside your underpants or knickers. Use baby powder (not perfumed talcum powder) to dust it. Change it each time you wash. Wear loose cotton underwear. Avoid tights and elastic ‘shapewear’ underwear, because they encourage sweating and moistness in the anal area. Avoid anything that keeps the buttocks close together. Do not use biological (enzyme) washing powders for your underwear, or perfumed fabric softeners. Instead, use a detergent labelled ‘for sensitive skin’. Do not scratch. If you scratch, you damage the skin more and then you itch more. If you feel you really must scratch, try pinching the skin near the anus between your thumb and forefinger through your clothing; this is less damaging than actual scratching. People often scratch at night and do not realize they are doing so. If you think you might be scratching at night, talk to your doctor about taking an antihistamine, keep your fingernails short, wear cotton gloves at night for a while and ask your doctor to check for threadworms. Do not use any greasy creams (such as Vaseline) on the area. Greasy creams keep the skin soggy and make the problem worse. Be very cautious about anaesthetic creams or ointments. Sometimes they can help by relieving the itch/scratch cycle, but use them only for a short period (about a week). Similarly, be very cautious about steroid creams. In the UK, it is possible to buy weak steroid cream (containing hydrocortisone 1% or less) from pharmacies. In the short-term, the steroid reduces inflammation and therefore relieves itching but, in the long-term, it can make the skin thinner and worsen the problem. Resist the temptation to keep on using a steroid cream. Use it for just 1 week, then throw the tube away. Try witch hazel – an old-fashioned remedy available from pharmacies. Dab it on twice a day, but stop immediately if it seems to be making the problem worse instead of better. Dr James Le Fanu has a column in the Daily Telegraph that acts as a forum for readers’ solutions to health problems. Readers have reported that the inside of a banana skin can relieve itchy skin, including anal itching. Feel round the anus for lumps. This may not be easy, because the skin round the anus is normally puckered. A lump might be a wart, a pile or a skin tag alongside an anal fissure. Avoid foods that cause excessive flatulence. Hope this has been a help. good luck, and try the inside of the banana skin idea!

Lee's earned his place with THAT goal, but I must say it doesn't always pan out like that, and I can see Adkins even keeping faith with Sharp, or putting Connolly or Guly in. I hope not, as I really want Lee to settle here and come good. Our right wing has gone from suspect to fantastic in a matter of a month. Guly will most likely be utilised there rather than up front now we have Lee and Sharp, Puncheon needs to be kept happy, De Ridder has a contribution to make and Chaplow keeps playing himself into contention too. With Lallana undroppable, it's not like they can even switch to start on the left! Something's gotta give, but what a pleasant headache for Adkins.

I like Harding, he's a good professional and a hard worker, and he was one of my favourite players last season, but Fox is a step up in class. Fox could play in the Premiership. Harding couldn't. (Well he could but he'd be on a par for effectiveness as Stephen Crainey.) Having never seen Dickson play, I avoid judging him, but it's obvious he'd not in Adkins' plans. Whatever league we're in next season, I reckon we'll see Harding more and more phased out, and Shaw more and more phased in. As for the "if we go up I could see the whole backline being changed thing", I think that we'll see Fox, Fonte and Jos for a while to come yet. Martin will stick around as cover too. Richardson would be the one I could see being replaced eventually, but I think Adkins has one eye on Stephens and Shaw being the full backs eventually.

I am ALL ABOUT long hot bubble baths. The trouble is, the hot water tank in our house is quite small, and I can only fill up half a bath, so it doesn't really last longer than an hour. I have mannish tastes in TV, although I did like that Pushing Daisies show that was on a couple of years ago. I do enjoy smelling flowers, I'm not sure if that's weird. Oh, two of my favourite albums of all time are Alicia's Attic "Alicia Rules The World", and Alanis Morrisette's "Jagged Little Pill".

I do shiftwork, she does housework. On the odd weekends I'm off, I go drinking, she does housework. She's going to make a good wife.

I'd love it if Billy Sharp got us promoted this season over West Ham. So what, he might not make it in the Premier League - you're not there yet you over-confident cocky East Londoners. I've said it before and I'll say it again - I'd love it if they don't go up this season. Up **** creek without a paddle.

Hattrick of own goals gets lolz aplenty. Bridcutt needs one more for a hattrick. I wish I were watching this.

"Could pay a fine of up to £1000 and legal fees". Well, as he's nearly saved that much in fees over the years, it pays to cheat!

Let's just say a friend of mine tried it, and it stang for days.

Sadly, my "Let's Smash 'Em" idea was for the West Ham game. And we didn't, results-wise at least.

Martin with a bit of a limp wrist there...

Watford away is a tricky one to predict. On one hand, they've been inconsistant all season, and we're better than them, but they have it in them to win at home. That said, I think Blackpool will beat West Ham on Tuesday, and so a draw would be a good result. As for the rest of the season? Stay injury free, and hope Lallana continues his form which makes him the best player in the league, and we'll walk it. Only we can throw promotion away...

Went there in '94. My memory of the place is going to this theme park/water park hybrid and seeing a condom. Oh, and my friend lives in Armadale, which she calls Armpit, and can't wait to move away. So I guess you shouldn't live there.

Matt Messias. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/eng_prem/3947349.stm

Top of the League, we're top of the league, we are Southampton, we're top of the league...

The guy that punches the parrots when we suck.

Afternoon all! Sorry for my late arrivak, just got in from work. I cannot believe the score, does it sound like we're back to our best? Oh, and pleased for Lee too!

Oh, and Happy Birthday Saint Clark!

Greed won out. I hadn't expected Senor Clark to be so quick on the ball! Friday 13th! It's a sign.

Favouritism from Clarky there! :-D

Bump

I'm going to auction my services, no reserve, bidding ends when the Mods realise what carnage has been caused.

If you give me £5 I will keep your thread at the top.

If you give me £5, I will keep your thread at the top.