benjii

Apparently Eminem is the first celebrity to be revealed to have it. His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy. There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti!

But your contact is seldom correct, is he/she?

Yeah, he’s played this all wrong. There’s no way the council will let him spunk tens of millions on regenerating the waterfront now. What a doofus!

That was never the plan!

Terrible.

Hojbjerg really is **** at passing.

Studs up?

Smart team. Good job we're definitely safe.

Funny as **** if the league got cancelled. No title for Liverpool.

All part of God's plan.

Perhaps they were on the way to Portsmouth?

And how is it that Norwich and Watford are able to return our tickets “very late” but we can’t do that for our aways?

And how is it that Norwich and Watford are able to return our tickets “very late” but we can’t do that for our aways?

I don't really.

Fix up.

The sunny uplands of lower income and higher tax. Control! Result!

“Stonewall” does my nut in. A malapropism of some sort repeated ad infinitum by ignorant football pundits and fans.

Exactly. We don’t need to make eleven changes for Europe FFS.

Clinton Morrison featured in an amusing episode of The Magic Sponge podcast. It’s finished now but as a series it’s worth checking out. Some of the guests are hilarious.

So I was driving to work this morning and my son (seven) says, “Daddy, why don’t some people have enough to eat? I will give them my dinner.” Be like my son. #proud #humble #caring

Tyldesly does my nut in. Never shuts up and loves a big club. Any chance to hear Tim Vickery talk about football should be taken. He’s not really a commentator / pundit but gives great insights into the game as a whole - including broader social aspects. Unfortunately he only covers South America so he’s a bit niche.

Yanks say, “I could care less” - that is literally the phrase they use. Dopey feckers.

“Excited for”, instead of “about”. I saw some dinlow asking for a “praisee” of something in an email the other day. I assume he meant “précis”.

Too obvious. Standards are slipping.

Other than someone like Liverpool / Man U / Spurs etc getting relegated, West Ham would probably be the next funniest so I would love it if we can help them on their way. They really need a win against us.