SNSUN

I stand at the urinal until somebody pushes the hand dryer. Then I let rip. I've been known to time my poos in pub toilets using the hand dryer as cover noise. Especially poos which are really farty. You get fewer comments from everyone else in the bog if the hand dryer is going. The hand dryer is my friend.

Biglia would be a cracking signing, even though we don't need another central midfielder. Him, Cork, Morgan, Davis and JWP would represent outstanding talent in that area for a club that would be happy just to fight off relegation. I feel for Chappers and Deano but there's little room for sentiment if you want to progress through the leagues. RICHARD WRIGHT TO MAN CITY?!?!?!?!?!? WTF?????????? That's the strangest transfer of the window right there.

Perhaps the bang on the bonce knocked some talent into him. Like foreign accent syndrome, he may have Paulo Maldini syndrome. (We can but hope.)

Oh he'll sign. As player-manager. When Adkins retires. Tomorrow. In cloud cuckoo land. I'll wax my crack if we sign Del Piero tomorrow.

Thank God in just 23 and a half short hours, we'll know once and for all if all these posts have been futile or not. Funniest scenario? Saints announcing that we're putting off his signing until January. This thread will have broken the Internet by then.

Fonte's been making mistakes for a while now. He's still a good squad CB but I'd be much more comfortable bringing in better. Jos is immense, and I have no concerns with him. Hopefully Yoshida will give them a run for their money, and potentially make them play even better in order to keep their place, but I still think we have another CB on the way.

A centre back. Brrrrrrap. If you want my feelings on the transfer, the most vivid I'm feeling right now is.... relaxed. (But that may be because I've just had one of those really long wees that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy.) So a pacy striker and a centre back this week. We're getting there.

As I feel I am the pinacle of idiocy and am in a self-deprecating mode, I am nicking this avatar for the time being.... :-D

The BIC reviews were good, but the Paul Ross ones are hilarious, I'm crying tears of laughter as I read them! Excellent sense of humour from all involved. (And notice, most are written in flawless, educated English...)

Gimme Gimme Gimme a Manny after midnight...

lolz First match of the season for me. (Yes it's against Man U but I can't help my shifts.) Kingsland was all sold out so I've had to opt for a spot behind the goal in the Chapel. Apparently I have one of those faces you want to punch, so I'm hoping to distract the Man Utd strikers enough that they consistantly aim at me instead. (I'll wear a balaclava when Saints attack in the second half.) Too soon for this week's signings? Perhaps, but I hope they make an appearance anyway.

A toss up between being too busy, waiting for his international clearance to come through before we jump the gun, and possibly we're waiting for all the new signings to come through to get them all in the same picture. If the latter is the case, Adkins will look like a kid at Christmas.

According to the gospel that is Wikipedia, Rhys Williams' mum is Indian. That's close enough.

Plenty of frees around too, not that they have to be signed up before the window shuts. Danny Gabbidon's available if we do miss out on ALL our targets! lol

Goodness me I hope this quote is correct! It'd be one of the best finishes to a transfer window for Saints in memory. Yes people should say it should have been done earlier in the summer, but I wonder just how many of these players we're signing were available earlier, certainly for the right price when teams become desperate for cash. Yoshida, Ramirez and 3 others, I assume doesn't include Mayuka. So we can only speculate who the other 3 will be. I'd assume another centre back, a left back and another keeper? Perhaps Biglia instead of a keeper? I hope we do sign another keeper, more because I worry about Davis coping this season, not because I think Gazzaniga won't step up. (I haven't yet seen him to judge.)

As people have said he's been very accurate on transfers for Saints. I know there's a lot of *****s on Twitter but he seems to know what he's talking about. I'd be VERY surprised if the club sold the fans favourite. Yes he's 30 and every player has a price, but Lambert is a modern legend of the club. There'd be uproar if he gets sold this week. Villa can find someone else. I think it's harsh to rule Sharp out before he's even been given a decent shot at this level. Granted he'll never move mountains in this league but he's got a knack for goals. I'd give him a bash at least to see how he copes. That said, if we do move a striker on this week, which I don't think we will, I would expect it to be Sharp more so than Rickie. As for Mayuka? Well besides from the stats and the YouTube vid, I know nothing about him, but he looks good, quick, skillful and an eye for goal, and it's a signing, so I'm happy. I can't believe people are moaning about this - the first signing we've made in what feels like months. Yes he's a striker not a centre back. So what? He's going to make us better, because he's better than what we have. Adkins philosophy on transfers. Centre backs will come, nobody in football is stupid enough to see our centre back situation and not change it before the deadline. I'm sure the club is working their ******** off to get more reinforcements in, and I expect them to do just that. Keep cool. 3 days remaining.

First post in a few days, and I can't believe how long this thread has got. I take it it's positive news? I lost track of it at around the 60 page mark.

B-b-b-but how did you know? (Tab 1: SaintsWeb, Tab 2 XHamster, Tab 3: StickCricket) >> RE: The Ramirez situation, I'm not letting myself get het up about it. If we pull this off, and the Phillips transfer, then fantastic, I'll be fapping myself dry over it. My primary concern is that we've not signed ANYBODY for ages, and you could conceivably argue that we still need 1 GK, 2 CB's, 1 LB, 2 Wingers and possibly (if I were manager, which I'm as glad as you that I'm not) even another ST. I'm sure some of these will be addressed though by next Friday, but that deadline is creeping up. Deadline day will be interesting though. (Oh, my secondary concern is why my SaintWeb subscription was declined. Full of murderous rage...)

I like the Biglia link. While we would say we have enough central midfielders, if he's better than what we have, then that means he's Adkins type of signing. He's been at Anderlecht for 6 years, and I could see him fancying a new challenge, especially the lure of the Premier League. If he's reasonably priced, why not take a punt on him. Biglia, Cork, Morgan and Davis would be an awesome combo. I feel sorry for Hammond (in particular) and Chaplow (although he's versatile) but that's the price of success. I can see this happening, although perhaps it won't be until January. (When we have more cash! Pending us spending a fair bit this window.)

That Davis strike gets better every time I watch it. If only Puncheon had reacted quicker when through on goal...

Grannies and flaps should not be used in the same post. It gives me disgusting thoughts.

Jos Hooiveld's wrist-penis was too much for Tevez's butthole, as was his actual penis for Tevez's hip-vagina.

Clyne. Outstanding bargain if he carries on like this. Honourable mention to JWP and Guly.

Davis: Looked nervous at times, made the odd decision and got beaten at his near post for the first. Penalty save was easy. 6 Clyne: Looked excellent, especially in the first half. Bombed forward and was quick to get back, The odd mistake though but a promising start. 8 Jose: Played quite well, wanted to get forward at the end, but it's simple to see he can be upgraded if the right player becomes avaiable. Will still do a job for us this season. 6 Jos: Fairly solid given the circumstances, not his best game ever. 6 Fox: A real liability. Worst performance on the pitch. With a youngster as the only cover, it seems we do need a new left back brought in. 4 Punch: Played well in the second half but was largely invisible in the first. A useful player to have if he's in the right frame of mind.7 Morgan: Far from his best game, will need to improve at this level. 6 JWP: For a 17 year old against the Champions, that was a very solid start. Passing was good, but had a tendancy to panic unnecessarily. 7 Adam: Set up the second cleverly. Good to see him as captain. Will do well in the Premier League.7 Guly: Very impressed. His decision making sometimes lacks a tad but he worked his socks off today IMO. 8 JRod: Not a great performance in a position he didn't look too comfortable in. I wonder whether Adkins will stick to this formation... 5 Subs: Lambert: What more can be said about this man. Premier League quality already! Should have started? 7 Davis: Lovely goal, which I'm sure wasn't the plan when Adkins brought him on! Looking forward to seeing more of him. 7 Sharp: A good decision to bring him on, but barring a few crosses did little. 6