Secret Site Agent

Can I just ask one question about this. Why is it only in the Times and no where else? Surly this is a good story for all of the tabloids to spin around the need to sell VVD to Liverpool, but no one else seems to have oicked it up. Why? And, as I said in my rant, do some of you take this as gospel? I find a LOT of assumes, and interpretation, and Gao MUST be doing this because, and yet no real evidence beyond a single story int he times which no one else, including the echo, has yet ran wiht or added to. Not even to regurgitate the chunalism.

HOOOORRRRRRAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY. Not because they have edited the Times article to fit their argument, (where is the mention of 'This Month'?), but because they have actually admitted his price tag is the Saints £70 million, not the Liverpool £60 million. Small victories i'll always take. D

I'm glad to see that I have come back on here after my rant and most posters have got it, with or without my Satire.

Yes, It's true. Mr Gao has told Maricio that there are no extra funds available this month. Thats right, we are really in the deep do do now there are no extra funds available for the next week and a half I am ****in disguseted. How can we compete if the new owners REFUSE to give any extra funds to Mauricio to spend in the next 13 days. I am so annoyed that i'm going to make **** up,take rumour and innuendo as FACT, I'm going to MIND READ, and i'm even going to make up a club insider, who is close to the first team and management and pretend that he is telling me things, that I will make up. Whilst I'm on that, I have a mate who is close to the first team and management that tells me that Gao is going to sell VVD to Liverpool for forty million, of which 35 million is going straight to his own account. And it must be true, because it would NEVER be a plant to force us to sell VVD, as we know, other football clubs and agents don't go about that sort of business. And anyway, a team like Liverpool would talk to the SUN if they were going to leak a Story, definitely the Sun as it's their paper of choice up there.....the Sun Newspaper. Oh, for ****s sake. You don't believe the papers when they say VVD is going to Liverpool, You don't believe the papers when they say his asking price is £50 or £60 million, but you believe what you want to believe from ONE NEWS PAPER. The last sentence: Mauricio Pellegrino, the manager, is aware of the situation, however, and has been told not to expect any additional transfer funds this month. suggest to me he has to still deal with the cash he had before the takeover, as it's too early to shake things up, (You don't change horses mid stream), that's all.

With all of the American Football films based on true stories, this would make a perfect triumph-over-adversity fare. I know that Hollywood would glamp it up a little with us winning the Champions league by beating Manchelsea United 4-3 in extra time with Rickie scoring an overhead kick, but it would be a tale to tell. Did I mention Christopher Nolan as director?

Do you know what? If saints were an American Football Team, and Rickie Lambert a fat drunking wreck who had thrown away his god given talent when we bought him, and Marcus passing away, Hollywood would make a film about us. A plucky little team, thrown onto the garbage tip of Soccer and with now where left to go but down. Then, thanks to the vision of one man, and a group of mercena.........dedicated players, the team finally made their way to the top. Starring Kevin Spacey, as Rupert Lowe, Bill Nighy as Nigel Adkins, Tom Hardy as Rickie Lambert, Al Percino as Nicola Cortese, Michael Gambon as Marcus Leibherr, Harry Styles as Adam Nivea, Luke Pasqualino as Jose Bigballs, Idris Elba as Guly Del Prado. At the end of this film, you'll all be red and white. They March on, will you? Sorry, early morning and i'm off my medication.

That'll appear on RAWK as: Eh,eh,eh, Dat Simon PEEEEECH just tweetid dat the Chiken FAHKERS ar makin' a bid for Lazio defender Wesley Hoedt asa replasmen fer VV........yer 'erd it 'er firsssssssta.

I can't wait until September the 1 st when, (here's hoping) Coutinho goes and they don't get VVD, for the 'We didn't want him anyway' double posts. Loverly jubbly.

I wouldn't say EVERYONE wants him to stay. We don't, for LOL's. Barcelona don't. They want him to go without a doubt. I would guess Everton don't. Chelsea perhaps don't. The two Manchester clubs? Probably not. Aresenal. Perhaps they don't. WHU,Spurs,West BRom, Boscome? I don't think. The rest, probably don't care.

I just just image it now. 'OK lets take a vote. All those clubs that finished in 6th place or above in the Premier league last season who think this will disadvantage them raised your hands.'

The problem is that being ITK means you are getting information from a source within the club. I was ITK once and my contact we as windy as f as he kept saying it was his livelyhood he was messing wiht and for a while there was a witch hunt going on due to information being passed onto the press. I thought that Unbelievable Jeff and I had the same contact at that stage as the info we had was the same, but was coming from a different source. So I understand the need to be coy and TOM28 hasn't exactly let us down with his insights. That is why I understand the need to be coy with the truth. My mate no longer has links wiht Football talent, he now looks after Powerboat talent.

I am all for getting him on the banner, (I even wanted a statue of him, camera in hand, big smile on his face from our JPT win at SMS), so would appreciate this. He saved us from a fate worst than relegateion and -10 points. He's the reason why when I took my 5 year old daughter to see Saints play before they no longer existed back in 2005, she can still see them now in 2017. I often wonder what life would have been like if he hadn't passed away so soon, but that is then, this is now. MODS, I think this calls for a Poll?

Is your blood group 'B NEGATIVE'?

Here,here. I couldn't have said it better myself.

Fair play. I should have started 'Good Moaning'.

Oh no. According to this kKat is facing a very large tax bull!!!!!Is that when they put you in a rink and release the bull with Dollers on it's back? I just hope Mr Joshing Geosynchronous had better have a lot of Cosh if we are to investiture and hopefully keep Virgil Van Dyke, rather than sell him to Liverspots. :lol: So whose going to leave the baord now?

Read it again. It's Gao that's bought the stake, not Lander.

Here, here, heart ruling head

All Liverpool do is copy us. First they want our players Then they deny their player is for sale NOW he's handed in a transfer requiest. All we need now is a statement from Coutinho in the press, and him to be training along. It's like ****ing groundhog day. I just hope against hope he goes whilst VVD stays here. Quality Comedy Gold.

I'm up in Liverpool today and just popped into the Sandon for a bite to eat. Ive just been listening to two scousers at the bar arguing: Scouse 1: 'Well I reckon the club should let him go, he wants the move, he's put in a transfer request, he's got a mystery illness stopping him from playing. It's fing wrong that the manager and the club wont let him go.' Scouse 2: 'Nah, your wrong, kid. He should stay and honour his contract. The club are right to keep him, he has only just signed and contract, has years to go still, and should fing STAY'. Scouse 1: 'Don't be a nob. How can you force a player to stay when he is looking to move away to a bigger and better club.' Scouse 2: 'Thats ******. Why should the team be weakened just to please a selfish tossbag.' After 5 minutes of this back and forth and they getting angrier and squaring up for a punch up, I had a word with the barman. Barman: Oi, what are you two arguing about? Van Dijk or Coutinho? Both of the scousers looked at him and said, simultaneously, 'Don't rightly know'

I thank you too.

Thanks for all the support. Those that know me know that I try and inject some humour and try to keep us grounded, and I do a lot of satires. So go down well, some not so.Don't mind, my humour is not to everyone taste, and some jokes don't ht the mark. Fair enough. Remember, it is so easy to destroy, so difficult to create. Anyone can say something is crap, but they never say 'here's a better one'. I won't stop, I've never been warned for doing one, and never banned for doing one.So i'll continue.

Yeh, thanks for that.

Nothing at the moment, but one does hope for the future.

Wow, I never thought I would have this sort of impact. Is it because of this It is with regret that I can confirm that I have today handed in a transfer request to leave Saintsweb. "Unfortunately I feel I have no alternative after I was given notice of the Secret Site Agents intention to impose a Satire against Virgil Van Dijk and his agent of a waste of time equivalent to 2 weeks online. I will be appealing what I feel to be an unjustified sanction to Steve Grant and the MODS and their inability to follow the correct posting protocol in due course. "Over the past six months I have held numerous posts with posters of the board, to inform them all of my desire to leave the board in search of a new challenge. "I am incredibly ambitious and want to achieve as much as I possibly can to fulfil my potential in what is a very short career as a poster of messageboards. I want to post for a European football team again and enjoy the challenge for major honours and as such I would like Saintsweb to consider the interest in me from top clubs Boards should it still exist. "I have been left frustrated by the Moderators position that I am required to read this drivel and am disappointed that enquiries from multiple top clubs message boards have been consistently rebuffed. "The period of time that I have just spent thios summer without seeing Saints play has put a number of things into perspective and made me realise just how important it is to take major opportunities should they arise. "I have consistently relayed my feelings to Moderators at Saintsweb in what I believed to be private and personal posts. Disappointingly, these conversations have regularly found their way into the main board.. "Following this conversation Steve Grant explained that he only wanted posters who he felt were 100% committed to Saintsweb and told me I would therefore have to post away from the main board. Perhaps in nthe lounge or Muppet Show. "As a proud posterl I am insulted by the suggestion that it was me who refused to post positively and so feel it is important to point out the true version of events." :lol: