Minty Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 [Anyone taking this thread too seriously or who can't take a bit of fun being poked their way should probably leave now...] - Start of the season... most people expect mid-table, some expect more, some happy just to survive... everyone reserves the right to change their mind, and deny their previous prediction, for the sake of arguing on future threads. - alpine starts as he means to go on, using attack as the best form of defence... people who have never even noticed alpine, make a point of mentioning him in their posts to somehow make it seem more credible. (Including this one) - Every potential formation, tactic and set piece is dissected and proven to either be exactly what we need to do, or exactly what we don't need. Everyone is right about this. FACT. - Thedelldays starts to play devils advocate. Little do we yet realise but he is actually employed by the devil to do this job, given the dedication and time spent doing it. - Pre-season results go well/badly/as expected/don't matter, but that's ok because they are only for fitness purposes/are essential for the team to gel/are crucial to raise morale/prove that 12-year-old Johnny Youth Teamer is (definately not) ready to take League 1 by storm. And they don't matter. But they do. But not really. - According to forum members, the club needs: a new keeper, 2 new RB's, 4 new CB's, 1 new LB, 5 new wide midfielders, 5 new central midfielders, 6 new strikers, 8 new coaches, 5 new varieties of beer, better pies, an upgrade to the Spectrum ZX80 currently streaming Saints Player, new pictures in the boardroom, and someone to pay all our subscriptions to Saints Web for us. - ITK'ers confirm that all of the above will happen. Other ITK's confirm none of it will. A few more ITK's confirm a whole lot of other stuff that will happen that nobody has mentioned yet. - Frank's Cousin starts sharpening his keyboard... his dissertations on each subject begin and before pre-season is over, he's worn out his keyboard already. - The season begins. Mods forget to start/open the match thread, and 14 other people start one instead. After the game, everyone can accurately predict the rest of the results for the season, including scorers, goal times, substitutions and bookings. As a result, it's clear that we will be relegated. And promoted. FACT. - The ZX81 that now runs Saints Player crashes after 4 minutes of the first game. - Matthew Le Tissier (on the forum, not the player) posts something really, really important that everyone is ever-so-grateful for him posting. No, really. - StuRomseySaint takes a break from posting about his job, car and this weeks preferred female viewing pleasure, to ask what has happened to Saints Trust. - Halfway through the season, everyone 'knew this would happen', (whatever it was that happened), and criticises 'everyone else' for having a different view, when no one actually remember what they thought in the first place. But despite that, we all still know exactly what will happen between now and the end of the season. - Scott Arfield, Brian Stock, Neil Danns, Elliott Ward and Rudi Skacel sign in the January transfer window. Oh, no, wait... (Feel free to add your own, I should really do some work...) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The9 Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 How did they get a ZX80 to do streaming, that's what I want to know ? Probably using the resources not allocated to the website any more. Minty, do you think you can allocate some numbers for this so we can reference them all next season ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 -Tactics starts a thread about someone he would like to see us sign, and a while alter he does, thus making he and others think he is the ITK messiah -Matthew Le God spouts utter tosh about everything, but loves S.I no matter what -Portsmouth takeover thread started on main board, moved to lounge and goes 500 pages plus -Unsubstantiated rumour treated as fact by all -People start messaging potential linked rumoured signing on Facebook/Twitter -People think club officials are swayed by what is written on this forum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scudamore Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Derry tries (but ultimately fails) to make a post that doesn't include some reference to the teams use of width. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Dalek2003 mentions Glenn Hoddle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty Posted 10 May, 2010 Author Share Posted 10 May, 2010 I might as well get this in before someone else does: Minty sits on the fence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Kraken Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Sad Old Git responds to a thread about tactics, and calls Alpine negative. Alpine calls Sad Old Git obsessed. Complete tedium ensues. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gingeletiss Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Dalek2003 brings to the forums attention, the prospect of Glenn Hoddle becoming the new Saints manager, and how it was a travesty, that he was not allowed to return under the previous regime! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Gingeltiss repeats what i have written because he has me on ignore, still blaming me for Pinnacle's failure or something along those lines, or negativity etc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glasgow_Saint Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Glasgow_saint wins most positive SWF member for 3rd year running. Thanks to every1 that voted!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hypochondriac Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Alpine calls sad old git 'soggy' and someone else says 'dulldays'. Someone finally gives 19c his medication and he responds with a quite brilliant thread on religion before going missing. Sturomseysaint starts another thread on hooliganism and gets the predictable histerical response. Following this he revists his 'late night alcohol delivery' idea from a few years back to much hilarity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedAndWhite91 Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Dog creates yet more quality/random/disgusting threads. (delete as appropriate) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandwichsaint Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Plans to build new 60,000 stadium rubbished by several forum members as 'nowhere near big enough' ('I just wish this club would show some ambition for once, FFS') Away fans, coming soon to a block near you (allegedly). No way Saints will sell anywhere near 35k for JPT at Wembley ('tickets will be easy to come by' 'everybody that wants one will get one') Saints shouldn't even try to win the first round/second round/semi final/regional final (of the JPT), 'I won't be going even if we get through and I can't see more than 25k trekking up to London on a Sunday for a mickey-mouse final' Our pies and beer are the worst in the whole of the football league, FACT. Lowe was too tight to install undersoil heating / undersoil heating wasn't deemed necessary due to the stadium location / undersoil pipes were installed but Lowe 'never bothered' to have them connected. SMS is in a fantastic, pub-walking, traditional city centre location / SMS is siuated in a slum and suffers from intractable traffic problems. There is no media-worthy event at the football club that can't be made worse by a few choice words from self appointed uber-fan Nick Illingsworth (and where did all the Saints trust members vanish to?) The new home shirt will definitely have some red and some white somewhere on it and will be loved by 50% of the fan base and rejected by the other 50%. And finally .... WE'LL WALK THIS LEAGUE NEXT YEAR! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The9 Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Alpine calls sad old git 'soggy' and someone else says 'dulldays'. Someone finally gives 19c his medication and he responds with a quite brilliant thread on religion before going missing. Sturomseysaint starts another thread on hooliganism and gets the predictable histerical response. Following this he revists his 'late night alcohol delivery' idea from a few years back to much hilarity. He's banned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatch Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Whens the new fixture list out? Anyone know? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The9 Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Whens the new fixture list out? Anyone know? Bagsie/shotgun guessing we play Bournemouth away on first day, even though there's no possibility of it happening due to the configuration of the fixture computer, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farawaysaint Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Lallana, Lambert and Pardew all leave to go to Celtic a club dwarfed by all major league 1 clubs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farawaysaint Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Expats vilified for daring to leave Britain. Farawaysaint claims exile status; surprising lack of interest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 the9 will release an inaccurate fixture list for Outlook Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The9 Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 the9 will release an inaccurate fixture list for Outlook :partyman: It was perfect, other than not changing a couple of 09s to 10s when I cut and pasted it, us going on a couple of cup runs, and having no idea if we'd get drawn home or away in the JPT... ...I've got one for the World Cup if you want it ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Belgiansaint Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 great post. totally unrelated: van damme signing for wolves and the lady is moving in in august. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Van Damme is going to WBA i heard.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dubai_phil Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 6 Prominent TSW members travel to Dubai on Business/Vacations, drink too many Bullfrogs and have not been seen or heard of since they were last spotted in the Seaview Hotel. LLS is a dead cert to buy Pompey TSW are credited/ not credited by the Mass Media for inventing the names Al Mirage, Storrieteller & Android. Muffins make a surprising comeback in stores across the Southampton Area Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Belgiansaint Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Van Damme is going to WBA i heard.... definitely wolves. he said so himself in the belgian press. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arizona Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Just to crawl shamelessly up my own arse... Start of the season I said we needed at least 10 new players in. I was shot down by most on here as being ridiculous as we only needed 4 or 5 more players to have a really good squad. 10 months later and we've found Lambert, Barnard, Connolly, Hammond, Waigo, Antonio, Fonte, Martin, Seaborne, Puncheon and Otsemobor (we'd already signed Harding and Murty). Apparently we still need a CM, RB, CB and ST. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 not quite got the hang of it eh arizona? No surprises there i suppose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RonManager Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Well it all started with......... No - it's gone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisobee Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 The Mods as always are slow to respond but finally Arizona does and per usual states the obvious speaking for them all by saying they really do know it all and are never, ever wrong and heaven help anyone who begs to differ. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisobee Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 not quite got the hang of it eh arizona? No surprises there i suppose Haha, Stevo in sarcastic comment shocker! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 chrisobee in pointless rant clanger Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisobee Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 chrisobee in pointless rant clanger chrisobee doesn't want to respond to Stevo's stalking but can't help himself............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 http://www.dictionary.com/stalking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suewhistle Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 definitely wolves. he said so himself in the belgian press. Can't be. You didn't say "FACT". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisobee Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 http://www.dictionary.com/stalking Once again Stevo posts incorrect link, Dictionary.com- page not found FAIL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arizona Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 not quite got the hang of it eh arizona? No surprises there i suppose I just felt it had been a while since a complete stranger pointed out my inadequacies on the internet. Thanks for helping me out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suewhistle Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 I think we need a t-shirt for users of the board. "I am an SWF obsessive": in three versions: one with Pessimist on the back, one with Optimist and one with FFS. I'll leave you decide who will get which one... I still treasure my 'Let's go The Dell' t-shirt from the old Saintslist. I don't remember quite so many nutters on that list, but I suppose that's the democratisation of the web for you. Even Pimply has forums these days! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arizona Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 This place isn't a patch on youtube. You could watch a video about oragami and there'd still be nutters arguing about the Iraq war, the World Cup and everything in between. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Some called it the post of the year, some wondered if a better analogy had ever been put forward- http://www.saintsweb.co.uk/forum/showpost.php?p=551811&postcount=173 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dubai_phil Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 Some called it the post of the year, some wondered if a better analogy had ever been put forward- http://www.saintsweb.co.uk/forum/showpost.php?p=551811&postcount=173 Now, before we all click on the link let's see if we can guess who came up with the candidate for post of the Year and who posted it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 10 May, 2010 Share Posted 10 May, 2010 No competition Phillip Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The9 Posted 11 May, 2010 Share Posted 11 May, 2010 Now, before we all click on the link let's see if we can guess who came up with the candidate for post of the Year and who posted it? Jeremy Clarkson ? This thread got crap in the last 15 posts btw. Arizona does appear to have missed the point entirely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dubai_phil Posted 11 May, 2010 Share Posted 11 May, 2010 Jeremy Clarkson ? This thread got crap in the last 15 posts btw. Arizona does appear to have missed the point entirely. Ah Clarkson - there's another story for the Forum match after party... But you are right, this was a darned amusing thread until the Thought Police forgot what they were typing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 11 May, 2010 Share Posted 11 May, 2010 FFS Arizona Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxstone Posted 11 May, 2010 Share Posted 11 May, 2010 With Lowe gone, Richard Chorley finally has nothing left to say and stops posting ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
westofshannonsaint Posted 11 May, 2010 Share Posted 11 May, 2010 we were reminded that Fans who cannot make it to games know absolutely nothing about football. And their opinions are a waste of internet space. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty Posted 28 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 28 July, 2010 So, new season nearly upon us... any of these happened yet?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trousers Posted 28 July, 2010 Share Posted 28 July, 2010 Someone resurrects an old thread from months/years ago and some muppet (Trousers) reads all the way to the end before releasing it's an old thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buctootim Posted 28 July, 2010 Share Posted 28 July, 2010 With Lowe gone, Richard Chorley finally has nothing left to say and stops posting ! Nah. Cortese is the new Lowe/ Wilde/ Crouch donchaknow. He must be vilified at all costs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctoroncall Posted 28 July, 2010 Share Posted 28 July, 2010 Someone resurrects an old thread from months/years ago and some muppet (Trousers) reads all the way to the end before releasing it's an old thread lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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