Crab Lungs

Ok, so you’ve been parachuted in by Mr Gao to save his investment... like some sort Gerald Krasner figure but with a finger in every pie, what changes to the club would you make at a board and management level to try and save the club? Here’s mine... Today and in the next week - Pellegrino and company out. Right now. - Approach aura manager with huge incentive to keep us up, no contract beyond that. I’d try Ancelotti, 10m to keep us up. Similar figure to Hiddink. If not, go for Silva. And if not that, put a caretaker in charge and start looking ahead to next season. - Tell Reed his times up. No, not at the end of the season... now. You too, Wilson. You can bugger off too, Ralph. - Come back Paul Mitchell, all is forgiven. - Ban w4nky promo videos indefinitely - Never appoint a player liaison officer again. They’re grown men, not four year olds. Until the end of the season and beyond - Find top level management executives with drive and some form of footballing background. Plus another Monchi or whoever scouts for Genk or any other Belgian club. Or Villarreal. Look to clubs who have truly mastered how to punch above their weight and learn. - Implement a philosophy and vision for the club. Recognise that we are a stepping stone for talent but never identify or define ourselves by it. No stupid 75% homegrown rule. If we do have to buy abroad, we do it... and we do it well. Plenty of decent 2,3,4m players out there if you know where to look. - Ban Wesley Hoedt, JWP and Fraser Forster from playing for us again. Transfer list them, likewise Redmond. Tap West Ham up, as they’d be the only club stupid enough other than us to pay these players money for playing football - Assuming we stay up, find a manager (not a head coach) known for promoting an exciting brand of football, who has a plan and is committed to the new club philosophy. Back him exponentially. He has final say on players, not a f()cking transfer committee. -If we go down, plan changes a bit - the manager type would have to be a proven Championship manager with a sole remit to get us up... don’t care how you do it, just get it done. For example, the likes of Bruce, Or similar. No gambles or left-field rubbish. - No more w4nky promo videos, I mean it. - Engage with the fans on the important issues at the club... not the usual sh1te like “Ello, I’m Pete from totton. Season ticket holder for 45 years man and boy. I don’t like the beer, it’s not cold enough”. No, no, real club issues. Ticketing, standing areas, away travel, community stuff and of course, what’s going on on the pitch. - make sure he club never takes for granted its position at the top table again. I’ll probably think of more. It’s all pie in the sky, but that’s what I’d do. You?

If it’s an empty stadium it’ll help them. It won’t be, and they’ll win 3-1.

Les Reed and the much adored Kat. And Mr Gao has to grow some f()cking balls too.

I’d rather he played than Carrillo.

First it was Eric Black who they tried to scapegoat. In January it was van Dijks fault. Bottlejob management and leadership.

Likewise if we stay up, I reckon. Nothing player.

Pellegrino, Wilson, Reed, Krueger, Kat, Mr Gao.... GO F()CK YOURSELVES. This whole mess has been totally avoidable for months. Well done for undoing the hard work of so many good people.

Pointless.

Why are you defending him? It’s patently obvious he’s culpable for a lot of this mess.

Think it might be too late now. Only chance is a unifying ‘aura’ manager... which we won’t get.

Rupes at least faced up to the fans.

Yup.

Possibly the most inept manager I've ever seen at Saints. Terry Connor me up, somebody.

Nasty, poisonous, useless turd.

45 minutes. They've shown nothing. Nothing at all. This isn't wholly down to the players, but yes, they've been sh1te considering they're professionals. Despite them being inept, this comes from the top, the supposed leaders. Abysmal stuff. Nothing ever changes. Ever. As for Reed, Pellegrino. F()CK OFF. PLEASE. NOW. PLEASE.

16m dutch Aaron Martin.

I don't think its fight, it's tactical direction. There is no identity. Exactly what the f()ck that useless c()nt does in training I don't know. Thank god Forster is no longer in goal, we'd be where WBA are by now.

f()ck me this is horrendous. If by chance, our lone striker holds the ball up and lays it off, we get into the final third then pass, slowly, sideways, then backwards, allowing the opposition to get back into position to defend. Leave this club you f()cking c()nt

any chance we might have a shot?

The most annoying all isn't the gormless w4nker of a manager or the absolute sh1tc()nts on the board, oh no... the worst and most annoying thing of all is that this whole cock-up of a season has been totally avoidable.

Newcastle are gonna pump us today. Hideous team, hideous board, hideous manager. #wemarchon

Any reason why you keep saying this? Literally everyone thinks it's mental he's still in charge, and I'd like to think Gao would have at least a little bit of savvy to realise the bloke is absolute dog toffee at his job.

I was effectively cyber-bullied because I had the temerity to say FF was sh1t when we signed him.

The only way redmond or jwp will leave is if someone needs to bolster their English contingent for continental football. I literally can’t see anyone wanting them otherwise. Hoedt would look **** at any level.. basically another Jakobsson so wouldn’t begrudge him a move at all. A 16m Dutch Aaron Martin.

Apologies didn’t read it in full. First name that come to mind was Paul Jewell. ****sake. Then Dennis Wise.