Saint Marky Posted Monday at 10:39 Posted Monday at 10:39 (edited) Purely judging a book by its cover only, what career do you think any footballers past or present, would have taken if they hadn’t ended up playing football? Adam Armstrong : Postman Ross Stewart : Store security guard Ryan Manning : unemployed Mason Mount: drug dealing paid informant/grass Bruno Fernandes : Hairdresser Luke Shaw : Burger King Cook Joelinton : Serial Killer Edited Monday at 12:16 by Saint Marky 1
tdmickey3 Posted Monday at 10:54 Posted Monday at 10:54 12 minutes ago, Saint Marky said: Purely judging a book by its cover only, what career do you think footballers would have taken, if they hadn’t ended up play football? Adam Armstrong : Postman Ross Stewart : Store security guard Ryan Manning : unemployed Mason Mount: drug dealing paid informant/grass Bruno Fernandes : Hairdresser Luke Shaw : Burger King Cook Roy Keane : Cage Fighter
Turkish Posted Monday at 11:00 Posted Monday at 11:00 Taylor Harwood Bellis looks like an electrician Jack Stephens - The guy who directs planes after they land James Ward- Prowse - Traffic Warden Ryan Manning - Barista in a crap coffee shop Tonda Eckhert - Spreadsheet geek, oh wait...... 1 4
Miltonaggro Posted Monday at 11:53 Posted Monday at 11:53 Adam Lallana - Adz at Toni & Guy Gavin Bazunu - carpet fitter Sam Edozie - Carphone Warehouse Flynn Downes - Black Cab game Joe Aribo - bus driver 4
Zorba Posted Monday at 12:09 Posted Monday at 12:09 (edited) Josh Quarshie - Drag queen Edited Monday at 12:10 by Zorba 1
Miltonaggro Posted Monday at 12:16 Posted Monday at 12:16 6 minutes ago, Zorba said: Josh Quarshie - Drag queen Doubles up as the front end of a pantomime horse / camel. 1
sadoldgit Posted Monday at 12:46 Posted Monday at 12:46 (edited) Jack Stephens - Bouncer Adam Armstrong - Alter boy in a monastery. Tom Fellows - work experience boy Iain Dowie - failed boxer Matt Le Tissier - banjo player in the film Deliverance Terry Hurlock - extra in any Guy Ritchie movie Terry Paine - collecting money on the Dodgem fairground rides Nick Holmes - Shaggy in the Scooby Doo live action movie. Phil Foden - the kid who offers to look after your car if you park in the street in Liverpool. David Beckham - member of East 17 Sammy Lee - rear end of a pantomime horse Edited Monday at 15:27 by sadoldgit 5
badgerx16 Posted Monday at 14:24 Posted Monday at 14:24 We all know what Peter Crouch said when asked what he would be if not a footballer; " A virgin". 1 9
Turkish Posted Monday at 14:29 Posted Monday at 14:29 3 minutes ago, badgerx16 said: We all know what Peter Crouch said when asked what he would be if not a footballer; " A virgin". That was funny, he seems like a really good lad who doesn’t take himself too seriously 1
badgerx16 Posted Monday at 14:31 Posted Monday at 14:31 1 minute ago, Turkish said: That was funny, he seems like a really good lad who doesn’t take himself too seriously I bet he never thought he would be doing TV ads for washing products.
beatlesaint Posted Monday at 15:03 Posted Monday at 15:03 Jack Stephens - Farm Labourer Gavin Bazunu - Postman Flynn Downes - KFC Food Taster Adam Lallana - Hairdressers Model Tonda - Hypnotist 1
St Louis Posted Monday at 15:19 Posted Monday at 15:19 Cole Palmer would 100% be making subs in Subway! 2
USaintA Posted Monday at 15:44 Posted Monday at 15:44 Gavin Buzunu: Grape Crusher at a winery (good with his feet). Flynn Downes: Professional Crab Imitator (you know, because.... sideways). Damion Downs: Historical Battle Re-Enactment Specialist (because shooting accurately doesn't matter). Etc 1
rooney Posted Monday at 16:11 Posted Monday at 16:11 1 hour ago, badgerx16 said: We all know what Peter Crouch said when asked what he would be if not a footballer; " A virgin". He would be the man we saw at the circus on stilts wearing a red top hat and tails./ 1
Saint Marky Posted Monday at 16:14 Author Posted Monday at 16:14 (edited) Paul Merson- the guy at the start of a roadworks, operating manually the red stop/ green go signs. Anthony Gordon- petty criminal Virgil van Dijk- Stripper Jamie Redknapp- van dijk’s fluffer Edited Monday at 17:28 by Saint Marky
Willo of Whiteley Posted Monday at 16:18 Posted Monday at 16:18 4 minutes ago, Saint Marky said: Paul Merson- the guy at the start of a roadworks, operating manually the red stop/ green go signs. He isn’t smart enough to do that.
Willo of Whiteley Posted Monday at 16:22 Posted Monday at 16:22 Flynn Downes, London cabbie Adam Armstrong, could see him as some farmhand boy Jack Stephens, bouncer, security guard Joe Aribo, circus performer Ryan Manning, a barista, and not a very good one Taylor Harwood-Bellis, a brickie Tonda Eckhart, IT geek, reminds me of Richmond from the IT Crowd Damion Downs, Bambi on ice Elias Jelert, a hobbit
Toussaint Posted Monday at 16:58 Posted Monday at 16:58 2 hours ago, Turkish said: That was funny, he seems like a really good lad who doesn’t take himself too seriously Watch his bio on Prime if you haven't already. he's had to endure a lot. 1
sadoldgit Posted Monday at 17:56 Posted Monday at 17:56 (edited) Fraser Forster - Herman Munster’s body double Gareth Bale - Cornelius in The Planet of the Apes Edited Monday at 18:02 by sadoldgit 1
Convict Colony Posted Monday at 18:53 Posted Monday at 18:53 (edited) Ryan Manning - Pikey Wellington - Rubber Boot Manufacturer Tom Fellows - 90s Tribute Band Singer Edited Monday at 18:54 by Convict Colony
Colinjb Posted Monday at 19:42 Posted Monday at 19:42 Rickie Lambert: CEO of Lambert's Beetroot Inc 2
Badger Posted Monday at 20:27 Posted Monday at 20:27 7 hours ago, sadoldgit said: Terry Paine - collecting money on the Dodgem fairground rides Good image. Is this based on seeing him - late 60’s/70’s - swaggering through town or into a pub wearing a sheepskin coat as was the fashion? The other option he might have had was greengrocer. 2
Badger Posted Monday at 20:29 Posted Monday at 20:29 7 hours ago, sadoldgit said: Phil Foden - the kid who offers to look after your car if you park in the street in Liverpool. Robbie Fowler or Carragher - the fuckers who’d threaten the small kid and nick it anyway 2
Toussaint Posted yesterday at 10:44 Posted yesterday at 10:44 Tonda . Not sure what his job exactly is, he’s a bit vague. All I know he has a lot of electronic devices and isn’t allowed within 500 meters of a school. 1
sadoldgit Posted yesterday at 10:54 Posted yesterday at 10:54 (edited) 15 hours ago, Badger said: Good image. Is this based on seeing him - late 60’s/70’s - swaggering through town or into a pub wearing a sheepskin coat as was the fashion? The other option he might have had was greengrocer. Yes! I remember a great description of him sporting “brilliantined sideburns.” Edited yesterday at 11:28 by sadoldgit
Whitey Grandad Posted yesterday at 12:45 Posted yesterday at 12:45 1 hour ago, sadoldgit said: Yes! I remember a great description of him sporting “brilliantined sideburns.” Are those all his own teeth or were some of them implanted by somebody else? 1
Secret Site Agent Posted yesterday at 17:41 Posted yesterday at 17:41 Russell Martin - Choreographer for Musical Youth tribute bands, teaching them to pass the Dutchie on the left hand side. Will Still - Model for Halloween Products Tonde Ekhart - Hypnotist at Butlins Adam Armstrong - Stunt man for Peter Dinklage Ross Stewart - Porter in the General Hospital Adam Lallana - Youth cpouncillor Rickie Lambert - Crime enforcer who always has a funny anachdote 1
Thereisonlyonemickychannon Posted yesterday at 19:28 Posted yesterday at 19:28 On 26/01/2026 at 16:14, Saint Marky said: Paul Merson- the guy at the start of a roadworks, operating manually the red stop/ green go signs. Anthony Gordon- petty criminal Virgil van Dijk- Stripper Jamie Redknapp- van dijk’s fluffer Gordon is spot on!
Miltonaggro Posted yesterday at 19:29 Posted yesterday at 19:29 8 hours ago, sadoldgit said: Yes! I remember a great description of him sporting “brilliantined sideburns.” More flattering photo: 2
BarryVenisonsHair Posted yesterday at 19:30 Posted yesterday at 19:30 Armstrong would be the son of a potato farmer in medieval times
St. Ciervo Posted 8 hours ago Posted 8 hours ago On 26/01/2026 at 02:39, Saint Marky said: Purely judging a book by its cover only, what career do you think any footballers past or present, would have taken if they hadn’t ended up playing football? Adam Armstrong : Postman Ross Stewart : Store security guard Ryan Manning : unemployed Mason Mount: drug dealing paid informant/grass Bruno Fernandes : Hairdresser Luke Shaw : Burger King Cook Joelinton : Serial Killer Maybe for FedEx because he does not deliver on Saturdays or Sundays. 2
kitch Posted 6 hours ago Posted 6 hours ago On 26/01/2026 at 10:39, Saint Marky said: Purely judging a book by its cover only, what career do you think any footballers past or present, would have taken if they hadn’t ended up playing football? Adam Armstrong : Postman Ross Stewart : Store security guard Ryan Manning : unemployed Mason Mount: drug dealing paid informant/grass Bruno Fernandes : Hairdresser Luke Shaw : Burger King Cook Joelinton : Serial Killer Adam Armstrong as a postman is absolutely nail-on 😆
Miltonaggro Posted 2 hours ago Posted 2 hours ago 4 hours ago, kitch said: Adam Armstrong as a postman is absolutely nail-on 😆 Angry little postman in shorts all year round, folding peoples post in half and leaving letterboxes up and gates open...
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