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Worst footie journalist/commentator


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Why is it that there are so many rubbish journalists and commentators out there. I always used to think that Clive Tyldesley and Andy Townsend were the epitome of crapness. But I was wrong. Adrian Durham (and Darren Gough) really really take the biscuit. I have to turn off talkSport when those two come on and I sometimes read the Mail on line (as no pay wall) but have given up on his articles as they are a complete pile of ****. And if you dare post a comment criticising him, it will get deleted.


talkSport - has some of the best and the worst. I very much enjoy Brazil when he has Warnock on. And Hawksby and Jacobs are amusing. But on the other side, apart from idiotic Durham, Johnny Vaughan runs Durham pretty close with Keys & Gray not far behind along with Colin Murray. Keys and Gray are dinosaurs who if they were a dog, would have been put down a long time ago. Sky seem to have a decent set of analysts but still the commentary lets the side down. Why do commentators feel the need to make inane comments the whole time?


(right - off for a cuppa)

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I drive around a lot during the week and tend to listen to talksh*te.

Hawksby and Jacobs is a decent radio show but I can't stand Colin Murray, he really has nothing to say himself but attempts to spar with his guests in a little brother niggly kind of way.

The BBC commentator Alan Green also annoys, but it may be that whining Northern Irish accent, like Murray, that does me in (?)

I think Adrian Durham is employed to wind up for a response.

Edited by Kingsland Red
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Talksport is not as good as it was. Porky was great with Brazil, the only decent co-hosts he has now are Brian Moore and Warnock. Alvin Martin and Ray Houghton are pretty good, but I used to like Lofty from Eastenders show from years ago.That Murray is pony, dire, the midmorning slot is ruined now.Bring back Gaunty and I miss the late great Mike Dickin. In the evening, Sports Bar is dross, Goldstein and Cundy are too juvenile and Bobby Gould's even more of an old fossil than Dave Merrington.


Away from Talksport, Claridge is good and I like Keano but can understand that he's not everybody's cup of tea.


Garth Crooks FFS, the biggest plum that ever picked up a mike. Nobody else comes anywhere near. Motty needs to **** off and retire.


Best anchorman Stelling, best pundits are Gary Neville and Stewart Robson by a mile.

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of all the sports taters, presenters.......



Alvin martin




Stelling and all of soccer sat


Neville and ed chamberlain

matt holland



not my liking

Brazil and any part of his show

durham and his show and his co presenters

Perry groves, cundy, gould



cant stand

ronnie Irani. utterly incredible he lasted so long on the radio

ray wilkins





any patronising "one night in istanbul" tater on ITV

keys and gray

michael owen




IMO, talksport went right down hill when when they binned the talk radio aspect of it. Gaunt, Dicken, Whale and Ian Collins provided a nice break from the inane churn of the same footballing stories

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Battyman - I can't do Matt Holland as he teams up with Durham and is far too sycophantic. Can't stand Durham so can't stand anyone with him - Holland but especially Gough who really should stick to cricket. Maybe it is that I can't stand over opinionated Yorkies. I guess Irani falls into the same category as Gough in that he should stick to crcket. Collymore shouts the whole time and his accent is annoyingly whiney, and he seems to think that he was the best football player the world has ever seen - annoyiing. Savage I don't mind, at least he has a self-deprecating humour although I find his stance on supporting pro footie players come what my slightly annoying.


I guess it's all personal taste. As for TalkSport, why charge people for calling in?

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Where has Peter Dreary disappeared to? If ever there was an ITV tater to drive you to suicide it is him.

But then any ITV commentator whenever one of the golden untouchable top 4/5 are being fawned (sorry) commentated on all of them must be sat in the commentary booth with their trousers round their ankles and a box of Kleenex to hand, plus have their voices controlled by the sphincter contractions of which ever of the top 4/5 team they have their heads up the backside of (sorry again) are on show before them.

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One man minority, I quite like Colin Murray, his Friday evening show on 5live was always a decent listen.


Really hate football on ITV, presenters, pundits and commentators.


Andy Townsend wins the overall biscuit though.


Keane is best bar none. There is fury in his eyes.

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without question Garth Crooks is the worse football pundit on TV at present IMO.


I think he speaks so slowly simply because his brain is too small to cope with the twin task of thinking and opening and closing his mouth. This horrific stuttering delivery is so off putting, for a short while you actually think he is an intelligent guy, but when you decipher what he has been struggling to say for the last half hour you realise that he has told you the square route of **** all.


He annoys me more than Jimmy Hill did, which surely is impossible. Jimmy could at least speak clearly in joined up sentences, all be it to tell us a complete load of ********. Crooks doesn't even manage to come up with ********, or if he does I have got so bored waiting for him to deliver it that I've switched off.


If your job is to speak about football IMO the bare minimum requirement is to a) know about football and b) be able to speak. He struggles with both. Ideally coming up with coherent arguments and insightful or original thoughts should be a must too. However it seems that you have to have played professional football to be allowed to talk about it on TV, so that reduces the selection pool somewhat.


It annoys me greatly that my TV licence is being used to pay people like him. I think by and large ex footballers are poor pundits. Not all, but many. I actually much prefer listening to the local journalists as they at least come up with original thoughts and they know exactly what is going on in the background. These guys are the real specialists and should be used much more.

Edited by Chez
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Niall Quinn is worst by far for me, cannot stand listening to him




quite like talksport but can't stand Durham, all though I believe his purpose is to wind people up to the point where they have to call in to tell him how wrong he is, therefore paying his wages.

I used to quite like Ally McCoist when he did commentary for ITV, although expect i'll be in the minority

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Terry Gibson is excellent on Sky La Liga coverage, and I quite like Gerry Armstrong as well.


Townsend obviously takes the award for the worst, with Niall Quinn a close second. Garry Birtles also gets a mention. For a football commentator, he doesn't seem to like football very much.

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The standard is desperate.

Shearer says precisely nothing, but in a quite genial" one of the boys way". No good at all, but art least you don't have to put up with him through the whole game.

I like pundits who actually explain features of the game that I don't understand or didn't spot from the TV coverage.

The 2 Nevilles pretty much have the monopoly on this. Lee Dixon is good.

Townsend and Tyldsley do my head in.

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I rather like Garth Crooks. Not because of what he says, which is inane at best, but because he says everything with mad "dare you defy me?" attitude. Which leaves his copresenters completely nonplussed, because he's said nothing you can even engage with, let alone argue. Compelling television IMO.


Also, Michael Owen as co-commentator on BT Sport is pretty decent. Not afraid to say what he thinks and contradict received opinion. The complete opposite of what he's like in the MOTD studio.


Speaking of which, Shearer and Savage are a pair of say what you see windbags, not a hint of nous, just cliches. And seemingly immune to criticism because they 'played the game'.

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Have not listened Durham since NC left, some Saints fan called in as usual he did not take notice of what he said, then totally twisted it into something else! Him and Gough I somewhat tolerated but now never have them on!

Going off Colin Murray, good start but now show running thin! Bob Mills stutters and splutters more than Brian Moore! Perry Groves not too bad but still ranks me he was **** at The Dell. What happened to that Kelly Southerton?

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I was always quite fond of Tony Gubba. Mots on really has to retire.


I also don't mind Colin Murray. It's clearly meant to be a more laid back show and makes easy listening. Although Bob Mills is terrible.

Durham and Gough are clearly there to get a reaction. I'm too chilled out to get wound up by someone on the radio so find it amusing. Durham also hates pompey and always goes on about how they cheated.


ITV have got it all wrong.


Sky have got it all right. I still can't believe I actually like Gary Neville now. (Although I think they still haven't managed to replace Andy Gray as co-commentator)

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Not only do ITV have awful commentaries, if not on HD they also show their stream as if it is being filmed by Townsend on his old Nokia.

Nothing like watching football being played on a flowing green sea.


Is it Matt Smith who is.....incapable.....of....finishing a simple....sentence....in under....a minute?


BUT the thing that really gets me is that some do not even know the laws of the game.


He's onside!

No he's not, you do not need daylight, he is clearly head, chest and one leg offside!


He got the ball.

Yes, but he followed through with his studs at knee height, it's not 1972.



He's not that type of player.

Yes he is, he just did it.


There was no intent.

Yes there was, and if you have played the game at any level or just knew your stuff you'd have a better idea of whether a player meant that or not.


They lack belief.

No, they lack technical skill, judgement and fitness.


What a free kick, there's no keeper in the world that would have saved that.

Yes there is, it was three metres inside the post.


What a brilliant save.

No, it was three metres inside the post.


He wanted it more.

No, he read the move and was quicker.


His shot lacked confidence.

No, he misjudged the cross and shinned it.



Sport can be dramatic enough without them trying to write it as a soap opera and give everything mystical depth and meaning.

Just show us the game and stop spouting crap.

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Tuned into the FA Cup the other day to hear 'and now to your commentary team, Sam Matterface and Clarke Carlise .


Can't stand matter face, but have to admit he does do his research and he is surprisingly fair with saints despite covering the skates for so long. I like Carlise, but he is terrible. He tells you nothing that you haven't just seen. He's just starting so perhaps he will improve.

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