The Day You Took The Mrs....

[Noodles34]

Just to give the 'who will it be?' a rest for a while.....

 

Done it twice, once I was going out with a girl from Gosport beleive it or not (she was a dirty ***** though which i guess, given her location was to be slightly expected, and i guess it somewhat excused the location anyway....) who I took in the 90's, she liked it and wanted to go, me and my mates were not so keen, shortly dumped her (on a New Years Eve) so she's probabaly a skate now.

And my current Mrs, my wife (as they are known) has only ever been to Saints once, even though I have been with her for 15 years, an SMS trip to see us lose to Arsenal 1-0, night game, she was there for Henry (not the hoover), she ain't coming again (in many ways, 15 years you know, cornflakes every morning, sometimes you need Frosties).

 

Anyway, any good anecdotes out there, and of course for our lady viewers you can tell us about how you dragged your hubby down...

[the saint in winchester]

Noodles, have you been on the sauce? There more double-entendres in this than a Frankie Howard sketch!

Ooh er, missus, no, I say ... ooh I really do ...

 

"cornflakes every morning, sometimes you need frosties"!!!! I'd settle for cornflakes at any time of the day, even once a week would be nice.

You've got me at it now!!!

[Smirking_Saint]

Ahh, thought you meant up the ars* at first.

[Noodles34]

Ahh, thought you meant up the ars* at first.

 

reckon the mods would have locked that, but i like where you are coming from, so did your mrs eh....

[Noodles34]

Noodles, have you been on the sauce? There more double-entendres in this than a Frankie Howard sketch!

Ooh er, missus, no, I say ... ooh I really do ...

 

"cornflakes every morning, sometimes you need frosties"!!!! I'd settle for cornflakes at any time of the day, even once a week would be nice.

You've got me at it now!!!

 

Sitting here drinking Jonny Walker (****ing cheapo Red Label) very, very bored and I thought, **** it, i'll think of a thread, no doubt will be shot down by the full timers on here (you know the ones I mean, we all do) stating "you have no right to start a thread", "how dare you", "irrelevant", "Mods lock this", "there is no reason for this thread", "been covered before", "I reckon Phil Brown", "whats this got to do with Cortese" and then will desend into Alpine Saint telling everyone how ****ing great he is (or how to spell), Sadoldgit calling him a ****** and SRS or DBP (whoever he is today) being a caant.

It is a bit carry on, will no doubt offend, frankly couldn't give a **** on this site anymore (there's me infraction this week), but the will is there to take it forward, just think someone will give a funny story about taking their Mrs to the football (or up the arse, whichever is more relevant), you know, isn't this how the forum works?

[Jonnyboy]

mods, move to the muppet show, thanks ;-)

[LA77]

Did she say "take me somewhere smelly and dirty. Somewhere you haven't been to before" and did you drop her back to Gosport after she asked you?

[SNSUN]

My missus is a Norwich fan, she claims she only likes going to SMS to spend time with me, but I reckon she likes it. All's fair in love and war though, and I've not once set foot in Carrow Road! So far...

 

She likes Antonio- getting her to go this season has been a little tougher without him than last season.

[saint_stevo]

Women at football..............

 

Really?

 

Football was always a nice release from my mrs

[Rocker268]

My girlfriend came to the Norwich JPT game last year and enjoyed heckling the opposition/away fans so much so came a few more times throughout the season, I think by the end she was enjoying the football almost as much as the heckles =p

[gonzo]

I took my better half to a game against Ipswich back in 2008, which ended up in a 1-1 draw. She'd been indifferent to football before that but she loves going now. She now gets p*ssed off at me if I go without her.

 

Both my kids are Saints supporters as well. Here's a great little story about my daughter, who's 7 (but she was 6 at the time of this). Our nephew sadly is a Pompey fan (been brainwashed by his dad unfortunately!). They'd been to the Pompey v Stoke match last season and he was talking about it and said 'unfortunately Portsmouth lost'. My sweet little 6 year old daugher, big butter wouldn't melt grin said, very loudly, 'that's because Portsmouth SUCK!'. Made me a very proud dad.

[Big John]

a funny story about taking their Mrs to the football (or up the arse, whichever is more relevant), you know, isn't this how the forum works?

 

Mine happened on the same day, one was as a result of the other.

[StDunko]

My girlfriend came to the Norwich JPT game last year and enjoyed heckling the opposition/away fans so much so came a few more times throughout the season, I think by the end she was enjoying the football almost as much as the heckles =p

 

I took my Mrs to the Plymouth away game on new years day a few years back. She is usually fairly quiet and sweet and not at all interested in footy, but by half time was effing and blinding at the ref and the home fans. She was told to sit down by the steward.

 

I had taken her to SMS to watch us against Bolton in the prem a few years previous to that, (I think we lost 1-0 to a JJ Okotcha goal), she was quiet at that one because we were in the back of the Northam corner and she was scared because we were high up and it was steep!

 

She is now converted to a saints fan and sticks up for the red army in her office full of skates. She makes me proud.

[Big John]

She makes me proud.

 

Oi Oi, keep it clean mate.

[NY Saint]

Flew over for a week and took my ex-wife to my first game at St. Marys and her first Saints game. She spent so long deciding what food she wanted at half-time that I watched the start of the second half on a TV on the concourse - and that's how I experienced Fabrice Fernandez goal. Hence an ex-wife.

[1976_Child]

women have no place at football. Period. (and sanitary towel).

[SaintBobby]

Congratulations...youve managed to start a thread on a new topic.

 

Not, for example, "My thoughts on Nigel Adkins" or "Saints 0 Rochdale 2"

 

I think you're getting the hang of this place!

[CB Saint]

Just to give the 'who will it be?' a rest for a while.....

 

Done it twice, once I was going out with a girl from Gosport beleive it or not (she was a dirty ***** though which i guess, given her location was to be slightly expected, and i guess it somewhat excused the location anyway....) who I took in the 90's, she liked it and wanted to go, me and my mates were not so keen, shortly dumped her (on a New Years Eve) so she's probabaly a skate now.

And my current Mrs, my wife (as they are known) has only ever been to Saints once, even though I have been with her for 15 years, an SMS trip to see us lose to Arsenal 1-0, night game, she was there for Henry (not the hoover), she ain't coming again (in many ways, 15 years you know, cornflakes every morning, sometimes you need Frosties).

 

Anyway, any good anecdotes out there, and of course for our lady viewers you can tell us about how you dragged your hubby down...

 

You have more that one? Do you come from Utah?

 

My wife is a glory hunting fan -as soon as we look like we are getting near Wembly / Cardiff she starts to pay more interest obviously angling for a day out at the final.

[St.Patrik]

Took the missus once to St.Marys - if my memory is correct was againt Barnley at home in the CCC - we got tickets from Tim Orme if you remember his so the tickets where very close to the team bench. My missus only liked the game once and it was not when Saints scored : / It was when Kenwyne Jones was coming on as a sub a took his warm up jersey off and she saw that he had six pack.....then suddenly the game was really interesting.....Last time I went to St.Marys (FA-Cup game vs Poopey) I took my 10 year old daughter instead - but to be honest she much more liked the shopping in London the day after - so next time St.Marys is on my own : )

[lordswoodsaints]

There is no place in football for the women

 

[alpine_saint]

You have more that one? Do you come from Utah?

 

 

Nothing wrong with Utah, been there a few times. Wonderful place, so long as you stay away from the temples.

 

See my avatar.

[Noodles34]

Congratulations...youve managed to start a thread on a new topic.

 

Not, for example, "My thoughts on Nigel Adkins" or "Saints 0 Rochdale 2"

 

I think you're getting the hang of this place!

 

what, you following me around? ..... what a loser

[Window Cleaner]

I would think that Will Shakespeare wrote Loves Labours Lost after a particularly trying afternoon with Mistress Anne down at Stratford FC.

 

I took my ex once, will never live down the shame of the tea-flask and the grapes,took the current mrs twice,both times to watch PSG at the Parc, unfortunatly she also shamed me by berating some innocent neighbour over his continual fag consumption.Thus by 2 pratical

experiments I have learned that women and football are immiscible.

[Marsdinho]

I took my Mrs up the other end.

[Turkish]

Women at football generally fall into two categories. There are the single ones that are generally lacking in cofidence, pretty ugly and deperate and think that by going to football it'll be a good place to meet equally desperate men, as they think them both being football "fans" they will automaticaly have something in common. THey assume they'll have the pick of the men as these beer bellied, shirt wearing, wannabe lotharios will be able to smell the snatch from a mile off and be hanging around them all like flies round sh*t, desperate to show them how crazy, funny and mental they are and hopefully be the lucky one of the 20/1 ratio that gets the chance to fill their slot with their love glue. This is why at football, a lot of these sad goons describe less than average looking women as fit as f*ck. A few beers down their fat, jabba the hutlike necks and any women in a football shirt suddenly becomes the new Lucy Pinder. Obviously for this type of women, if they are not fussy what they pull, football is a great pulling ground and they get more male attention here than in any of area of their lives so it makes sense for these sad, deperate types to use any avenue possible to get laid.

 

Then there are the ones in a relationship, insecure and jealous of their partner doing anything that doesn't involve them. They pretend to be interested in football because they think it keeps their partner happy, that they can go to games with them to keep them in their sight and to justify their attendance at matches by saying it is a chance for them and their hen pecked partner to spend some time together. The reality is of of course that their partner resents their attendance at matches and detests having his bird in tow. Unless of course he is one of these weak, pathetic men who allow their women to walk all over them and pretend that it's great that they share an interest like football and go together. I see many of these browbeaten losers of guys at SMS with their birds, desperatly to pretending they are enjoying their day, yet at the same time whistfully looking on at all the groups of lads enjoying themselves without birds in tow and wishing he was one of them instead of having to humour his jealous, insecure, psycho bird, whilst at the same time, sh*tting himself she is not looking at the other men in the ground and desperately wanting one of them to bend her over smash the granny out of her to know what it is like to be f*cked by a proper man.

[The9]

I've been to matches at St Mary's with 3 exes and my wife.

[docker-p]

I've been to matches at St Mary's with 3 exes and my wife.

Jesus, you're brave. I presume you all sat together?

[Julian H. Cope]

Women at football generally fall into two categories. There are the single ones that are generally lacking in cofidence, pretty ugly and deperate and think that by going to football it'll be a good place to meet equally desperate men, as they think them both being football "fans" they will automaticaly have something in common. THey assume they'll have the pick of the men as these beer bellied, shirt wearing, wannabe lotharios will be able to smell the snatch from a mile off and be hanging around them all like flies round sh*t, desperate to show them how crazy, funny and mental they are and hopefully be the lucky one of the 20/1 ratio that gets the chance to fill their slot with their love glue. This is why at football, a lot of these sad goons describe less than average looking women as fit as f*ck. A few beers down their fat, jabba the hutlike necks and any women in a football shirt suddenly becomes the new Lucy Pinder. Obviously for this type of women, if they are not fussy what they pull, football is a great pulling ground and they get more male attention here than in any of area of their lives so it makes sense for these sad, deperate types to use any avenue possible to get laid.

 

Then there are the ones in a relationship, insecure and jealous of their partner doing anything that doesn't involve them. They pretend to be interested in football because they think it keeps their partner happy, that they can go to games with them to keep them in their sight and to justify their attendance at matches by saying it is a chance for them and their hen pecked partner to spend some time together. The reality is of of course that their partner resents their attendance at matches and detests having his bird in tow. Unless of course he is one of these weak, pathetic men who allow their women to walk all over them and pretend that it's great that they share an interest like football and go together. I see many of these browbeaten losers of guys at SMS with their birds, desperatly to pretending they are enjoying their day, yet at the same time whistfully looking on at all the groups of lads enjoying themselves without birds in tow and wishing he was one of them instead of having to humour his jealous, insecure, psycho bird, whilst at the same time, sh*tting himself she is not looking at the other men in the ground and desperately wanting one of them to bend her over smash the granny out of her to know what it is like to be f*cked by a proper man.

 

So when did she leave you?

[The9]

Jesus, you're brave. I presume you all sat together?

 

Actually all in different parts of the ground, and across 8 years, but good one.

 

Turkish has missed a category of fit single birds who aren't desperate but think they are completely out of everyone's league too, we have a few of those from time to time.

[docker-p]

When your other half expresses an interest to going to a game, careful selection of the fixture can be benificial.

I took mine to see Saints play Gillingham, at Gillingham, League cup 2nd round, open terrace, rain. She's not expressed an interest in going since.

[Turkish]

Actually all in different parts of the ground, and across 8 years, but good one.

 

Turkish has missed a category of fit single birds who aren't desperate but think they are completely out of everyone's league too, we have a few of those from time to time.

 

I missed that category out because they are not out of my league, but would never entertain a bird like this.

[Danny R]

Women at football generally fall into two categories. There are the single ones that are generally lacking in cofidence, pretty ugly and deperate and think that by going to football it'll be a good place to meet equally desperate men, as they think them both being football "fans" they will automaticaly have something in common. THey assume they'll have the pick of the men as these beer bellied, shirt wearing, wannabe lotharios will be able to smell the snatch from a mile off and be hanging around them all like flies round sh*t, desperate to show them how crazy, funny and mental they are and hopefully be the lucky one of the 20/1 ratio that gets the chance to fill their slot with their love glue. This is why at football, a lot of these sad goons describe less than average looking women as fit as f*ck. A few beers down their fat, jabba the hutlike necks and any women in a football shirt suddenly becomes the new Lucy Pinder. Obviously for this type of women, if they are not fussy what they pull, football is a great pulling ground and they get more male attention here than in any of area of their lives so it makes sense for these sad, deperate types to use any avenue possible to get laid.

 

Then there are the ones in a relationship, insecure and jealous of their partner doing anything that doesn't involve them. They pretend to be interested in football because they think it keeps their partner happy, that they can go to games with them to keep them in their sight and to justify their attendance at matches by saying it is a chance for them and their hen pecked partner to spend some time together. The reality is of of course that their partner resents their attendance at matches and detests having his bird in tow. Unless of course he is one of these weak, pathetic men who allow their women to walk all over them and pretend that it's great that they share an interest like football and go together. I see many of these browbeaten losers of guys at SMS with their birds, desperatly to pretending they are enjoying their day, yet at the same time whistfully looking on at all the groups of lads enjoying themselves without birds in tow and wishing he was one of them instead of having to humour his jealous, insecure, psycho bird, whilst at the same time, sh*tting himself she is not looking at the other men in the ground and desperately wanting one of them to bend her over smash the granny out of her to know what it is like to be f*cked by a proper man.

 

Excellent post, 100% true.

[The9]

I missed that category out because they are not out of my league, but would never entertain a bird like this.

 

I said they "think" they are, not that they are.

[saints-cris]

Took my missus along to the awful 0-0 at home against Oldham at the end of last season. Surely a 0-0 against Oldham would put anyone off another game (almost put me off) but sadly she is keen to go to another.

[LA77]

Women at football generally fall into two categories. There are the single ones that are generally lacking in cofidence, pretty ugly and deperate and think that by going to football it'll be a good place to meet equally desperate men, as they think them both being football "fans" they will automaticaly have something in common. THey assume they'll have the pick of the men as these beer bellied, shirt wearing, wannabe lotharios will be able to smell the snatch from a mile off and be hanging around them all like flies round sh*t, desperate to show them how crazy, funny and mental they are and hopefully be the lucky one of the 20/1 ratio that gets the chance to fill their slot with their love glue. This is why at football, a lot of these sad goons describe less than average looking women as fit as f*ck. A few beers down their fat, jabba the hutlike necks and any women in a football shirt suddenly becomes the new Lucy Pinder. Obviously for this type of women, if they are not fussy what they pull, football is a great pulling ground and they get more male attention here than in any of area of their lives so it makes sense for these sad, deperate types to use any avenue possible to get laid.

 

Then there are the ones in a relationship, insecure and jealous of their partner doing anything that doesn't involve them. They pretend to be interested in football because they think it keeps their partner happy, that they can go to games with them to keep them in their sight and to justify their attendance at matches by saying it is a chance for them and their hen pecked partner to spend some time together. The reality is of of course that their partner resents their attendance at matches and detests having his bird in tow. Unless of course he is one of these weak, pathetic men who allow their women to walk all over them and pretend that it's great that they share an interest like football and go together. I see many of these browbeaten losers of guys at SMS with their birds, desperatly to pretending they are enjoying their day, yet at the same time whistfully looking on at all the groups of lads enjoying themselves without birds in tow and wishing he was one of them instead of having to humour his jealous, insecure, psycho bird, whilst at the same time, sh*tting himself she is not looking at the other men in the ground and desperately wanting one of them to bend her over smash the granny out of her to know what it is like to be f*cked by a proper man.

 

brilliant

[LA77]

Does anyone remember that bird when we were in the Premier League, I think it was a live game and she had massive tits and the most revealing of tops on. She was stunning. There was a picture of her in the papers if I remember correctly. Psycho or not, she was very tasty.

[landford.saint]

Mrs LS was actually born in Skatesmouth because that was the nearest maternity hospital to Porchester where her Skate Father lived. Took her to The Dell back about 1981/2, and she feel in love with a real football team. Been married now for 26 years and we are both season ticket holders in the Northam. As for ,her father I haven't spoken to him in 20 odd years following a big fight. She also hasn't spoken to him. He being your typical skate assh@le .....

[Noodles34]

Mrs LS was actually born in Skatesmouth because that was the nearest maternity hospital to Porchester where her Skate Father lived. Took her to The Dell back about 1981/2, and she feel in love with a real football team. Been married now for 26 years and we are both season ticket holders in the Northam. As for ,her father I haven't spoken to him in 20 odd years following a big fight. She also hasn't spoken to him. He being your typical skate assh@le .....

 

did you throw plastic chairs at him over a flimsy metal fence?

[Saint-scooby]

I had a second date last year with an ex at SMS, went for lunch prior, think we drew the game, anyway she was quite dangerous, but loads of fun. Still miss her now...

[The9]

Does anyone remember that bird when we were in the Premier League, I think it was a live game and she had massive tits and the most revealing of tops on. She was stunning. There was a picture of her in the papers if I remember correctly. Psycho or not, she was very tasty.

 

Rule 1

[AussieDog]

My 1st wife and I used to have season tickets but it used to get embarrassing when she started taking her book along and would read it during the game(I kid you not). That's not the reason she is an ex - but it would be a good enough reason on its own!

I moved down here in 2003 (minus the ex!!) and met a gorgeous aussie girl who I subsequently married. First trip back to the UK was in 2006 and there was only one game on while we were back but she wanted to show an interest so I bought her a ticket. We played QPR and lost 2-1 after being 1-0 up but she absolutely fell in love with Saints, and the whole game atmosphere (even if she can't understand the offside rule!). Trouble is, it's costing me a fortune now as every time I want to buy something from the Saints shop she wants something too, and when we got to the JPT Final I had no choice but to bring her back with me making it a VERY expensive trip. Luckily I managed to get a couple of tickets from friends back home, and also the next 2 home games. Now the missus is REALLY hooked and is making plans for us to come back for a whole season in 2013 (when youngest kid leaves school) so we can go to EVERY game. Don't get me wrong...I love Saints and experience all the highs and lows of winning and losing every week - but the thought of 9 or 10 months back in the UK through a british winter is NOT enthusing me right now!

[The9]

Blimey, that QPR game must have given her a warped view of the role of a goalkeeper...

 

That's the only game at St Mary's I've been to where I missed kick off by more than 5 minutes (just left leaving home too late), I missed us going 1-0 up through Jermaine Wright - no, REALLY - and singing "we are going up", then Kelvin's at the peak of his un-powers made a massive comedy error of judgement in trying to let the ball run out of play and we conceded Ray Jones' (RIP) goal, before the winner which I've completely forgotten.

 

Probably one of the few matches from the last 5 years I can actually remember anything from.

[Turkish]

I had a second date last year with an ex at SMS, went for lunch prior, think we drew the game, anyway she was quite dangerous, but loads of fun. Still miss her now...

 

man up you plumb.

[lordswoodsaints]

My 1st wife and I used to have season tickets but it used to get embarrassing when she started taking her book along and would read it during the game(I kid you not).

 

Did she do that whilst you made jiggy jiggy?

[Sold To The Man @ The Bar]

Nice one Nick, which one would you like a reply to ?

[CWD]

Just to give the 'who will it be?' a rest for a while.....

 

Done it twice, once I was going out with a girl from Gosport beleive it or not (she was a dirty ***** though which i guess, given her location was to be slightly expected, and i guess it somewhat excused the location anyway....) who I took in the 90's, she liked it and wanted to go, me and my mates were not so keen, shortly dumped her (on a New Years Eve) so she's probabaly a skate now.

And my current Mrs, my wife (as they are known) has only ever been to Saints once, even though I have been with her for 15 years, an SMS trip to see us lose to Arsenal 1-0, night game, she was there for Henry (not the hoover), she ain't coming again (in many ways, 15 years you know, cornflakes every morning, sometimes you need Frosties).

 

Anyway, any good anecdotes out there, and of course for our lady viewers you can tell us about how you dragged your hubby down...

 

Gosport is cool

[Saint Billy]

My wife's cousin is an Arsenal season ticket holder.

 

He had two spare tickets for a game and asked me if I wanted to take my mrs up the Arsenal. I declined saying that I only go to saints games, so he responded by asking if I minded if he took his cousin (my wife) up the Arsenal. I told him that he is more than welcome to ask her but she will probably find it boring.

[TijuanaTim]

Great distraction mate...First time I took the ex was to the Saints .v. Fulham 'starfest' back in the 70s, we had Ossie and Channon - they had Best, Moore and Marsh. The ex wanted t'see Besty.

 

Anyway the place was heaving and please feel free to correct me on any FACTs as maybe my memory is a little blurred on this one. Best's wife at the time (a real piece of @ss btw, Angie was it?) was dressed in leggings and was there with a huge lensed camera, going round the Dell photographing Georgie's every move. Anyway with Saints 2-1 up, slightly against the run of play, Alan Slough took out Channon. The ref had a word with the offender a then after a few seconds booked him. Bestie came over and remonstrated in his own innimitable way and don't cha know it the ref send GB off.

 

Rodney Marsh a little later in the game, when he realised it was a lost cause (probably) feigned injury and as Fulham had already played their sub they were down to 9 men. Saints ran out 4-1 winners.

 

Quite an eventful match, loads of drama - so the b!tch-trog (ex-wife) loved it. My overwhelming memory from that was the poise and excellence of Bobby Moore, what a class act.

 

Later, the story went round of why George Best was ejected...legend has it that he went up to the ref and asked him why he booked Slough, the official said "He called me a ¢nut!!", Best responded "He's right, you are a ¢nut!!"....the ref was not amused and sent him packing (apparently).

[scotty]

Women at football generally fall into two categories. There are the single ones that are generally lacking in cofidence, pretty ugly and deperate and think that by going to football it'll be a good place to meet equally desperate men, as they think them both being football "fans" they will automaticaly have something in common. THey assume they'll have the pick of the men as these beer bellied, shirt wearing, wannabe lotharios will be able to smell the snatch from a mile off and be hanging around them all like flies round sh*t, desperate to show them how crazy, funny and mental they are and hopefully be the lucky one of the 20/1 ratio that gets the chance to fill their slot with their love glue. This is why at football, a lot of these sad goons describe less than average looking women as fit as f*ck. A few beers down their fat, jabba the hutlike necks and any women in a football shirt suddenly becomes the new Lucy Pinder. Obviously for this type of women, if they are not fussy what they pull, football is a great pulling ground and they get more male attention here than in any of area of their lives so it makes sense for these sad, deperate types to use any avenue possible to get laid.

 

Then there are the ones in a relationship, insecure and jealous of their partner doing anything that doesn't involve them. They pretend to be interested in football because they think it keeps their partner happy, that they can go to games with them to keep them in their sight and to justify their attendance at matches by saying it is a chance for them and their hen pecked partner to spend some time together. The reality is of of course that their partner resents their attendance at matches and detests having his bird in tow. Unless of course he is one of these weak, pathetic men who allow their women to walk all over them and pretend that it's great that they share an interest like football and go together. I see many of these browbeaten losers of guys at SMS with their birds, desperatly to pretending they are enjoying their day, yet at the same time whistfully looking on at all the groups of lads enjoying themselves without birds in tow and wishing he was one of them instead of having to humour his jealous, insecure, psycho bird, whilst at the same time, sh*tting himself she is not looking at the other men in the ground and desperately wanting one of them to bend her over smash the granny out of her to know what it is like to be f*cked by a proper man.

 

turkish, you dont have a very high opinion of the female of our species, do you.

 

 

(funny as f*ck tho )

[beatlesaint]

My missus has only been to about 3 games in the 16 years we have been together/married.

 

One of the three was the day Franny scored......she actually missed the goal - **** knows how - but she does realise the significance of being there that fateful day....even though she didnt actually see it :-)