pap Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 Parenthood leads you down some strange and disturbing paths. Two years ago, I gave money to Simon Cowell so that Juvenile Unit #2 could maintain her One Direction addiction. This morning, I have been harangued in my capacity as "person near a computer" to purchase Ed Sheeran tickets, which as we all know, will go straight to a fund for ginger supremacists. I feel dirty about both purchases, if I'm honest - but Juvenile Unit #2 seems happy enough. Anyone else got any recent examples of taking one for the team? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saint Keith Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 get used to it mate! and get ready to start adding a nought onto how much they want to borrow off you as they head towards about 19 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saint Keith Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 my eldest was adamnat the hamster had a gammy eye and demanded it be taken to the vets. costs of hamster £4.50. cost of trips to the vets, £70 M U G Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatch Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 my girls had tickets to the X-Factor finals on a first come first served basis. Therefore that meant queuing for hours and hours so that they could get in. and I mean hours. I got to see the boys 1D live though as well , so it has upsides. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KelvinsRightGlove Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 Parenthood leads you down some strange and disturbing paths. Two years ago, I gave money to Simon Cowell so that Juvenile Unit #2 could maintain her One Direction addiction. This morning, I have been harangued in my capacity as "person near a computer" to purchase Ed Sheeran tickets, which as we all know, will go straight to a fund for ginger supremacists. I feel dirty about both purchases, if I'm honest - but Juvenile Unit #2 seems happy enough. Anyone else got any recent examples of taking one for the team? my girls had tickets to the X-Factor finals on a first come first served basis. Therefore that meant queuing for hours and hours so that they could get in. and I mean hours. I got to see the boys 1D live though as well , so it has upsides. Hatch, Pap you are both great Dads. Sadly, your girls aren't so great. I am of course just teasing bout your kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saint Keith Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 is this a particular dad & daughter phenomenon, or does it apply with boys as well? only 2 girls so never knew! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dimond Geezer Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 The Tweenies, at the Albert Hall, 12 years ago, not only did the tickets cost a small fortune, so did the spinning-flashing-lighty-up thing that every "had to have". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pap Posted 10 January, 2014 Author Share Posted 10 January, 2014 Hatch, Pap you are both great Dads. Sadly, your girls aren't so great. I am of course just teasing bout your kids. The little bastards rebel, KRG. Rage Against The Machine is "Dad music" to them. Ed Sheeran is the opposite. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamilton Saint Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badgerx16 Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 is this a particular dad & daughter phenomenon, or does it apply with boys as well? only 2 girls so never knew! You've got more chance with lads of steering them into sensible 'hobbies' - football, Iron Maiden, etc, and this gives you the ideal excuse to indulge in what you want to do. The problem with daughters is that for some reason, probably genetic, they can override all of your natural resistance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Special K Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 Not me, fortunately, but a good friend of mine had to take his daughters to a Bieber concert at the 02, ended up waiting for hours to get in and then had to hang around until after the concert finished (by which time the trains had stopped - i think it was a Sunday?) so had to pay for a cab to get back home. Cost him a fortune with travel and with the tickets and all. I'm sure when my nippers get a bit older, then they will demand something similar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halo Stickman Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 When my eldest lad was about ten, he persuaded me to take him on one of those pendulum swings at a travelling fair-ground. Now, normally, I haven’t got a problem with fair-ground rides, nor, indeed, with fair-ground operatives – I’m sure most of them are very conscientious chaps. It was just that the operatives on this particular ride struck me as not the type to bother too much with health and safety issues. Anyway, as soon as the pendulum started to swing, I became convinced we weren’t strapped in properly, and that we were both going to fall out. The further up its arc the pendulum swung, the tighter I gripped my son, and the tighter sheer terror gripped me. And when we got to the top of the arc, the bloody thing stopped, and when I say stopped, I don’t mean pause for a while, I mean STOPPED – stopped dead for several minutes, which seemed more like several lifetimes. From my upside down position, I could see a frantic Mrs Stickman several metres below me. I would like to be able to say that my thoughts at the time were something like, “darling, I’m gonna miss you and the kids very much”; but, in truth, my overriding thought was, “if our nipper ever wants to go on another fair-ground ride after this, you can damn well take him your ****ing self!” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buctootim Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 my eldest was adamnat the hamster had a gammy eye and demanded it be taken to the vets. costs of hamster £4.50. cost of trips to the vets, £70 M U G You'll be glad to know its common for Hamster's eyes to get a bit gammy and stick shut. You just dab it with a wet cotton bud. £70 up the swanny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pap Posted 10 January, 2014 Author Share Posted 10 January, 2014 You'll be glad to know its common for Hamster's eyes to get a bit gammy and stick shut. You just dab it with a wet cotton bud. £70 up the swanny I resurrected a hamster with a hairdryer once. At least that's my story, and the basis of the lucrative religion I founded thereafter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Window Cleaner Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 Parenthood leads you down some strange and disturbing paths. Two years ago, I gave money to Simon Cowell so that Juvenile Unit #2 could maintain her One Direction addiction. This morning, I have been harangued in my capacity as "person near a computer" to purchase Ed Sheeran tickets, which as we all know, will go straight to a fund for ginger supremacists. I feel dirty about both purchases, if I'm honest - but Juvenile Unit #2 seems happy enough. Anyone else got any recent examples of taking one for the team? Wait until they get to the stage of higher studies, you'll be taking so many for the team that splurging £70 on some rubbish songster or other will pale into insignificance. Worked out the other day just how much one BAC +7 and one BAC+5 to date had cost us, I think we could have bought a small island in the Caribbean with all mod cons and had enough left over for a couple servants. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halo Stickman Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 I resurrected a hamster with a hairdryer once. At least that's my story, and the basis of the lucrative religion I founded thereafter. I recommend goldfish for pets. They all look the same – when one dies, replace it with another; no one knows the difference. I ‘resurrected’ so many, the kids thought I was Jesus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatch Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 I'll be taking one for the team later this year. Its my eldest 18th birthday, and she wants a party. I can imagine a bar/club/whatever full of 18 year old girls would be absolute hell, but I suppose someone has to do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pap Posted 10 January, 2014 Author Share Posted 10 January, 2014 I'll be taking one for the team later this year. Its my eldest 18th birthday, and she wants a party. I can imagine a bar/club/whatever full of 18 year old girls would be absolute hell, but I suppose someone has to do it. I speak from recent experience. Most people are alright, but with some, it's a lot like playing Lemmings. Very difficult to keep them from causing themselves great harm. One of Juvenile Unit #1's mates spewed on an extension and took downstairs' plug sockets out. Wouldn't advise drinking yourself, in case you end up having to taxi some of them back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KelvinsRightGlove Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 I speak from recent experience. Most people are alright, but with some, it's a lot like playing Lemmings. Very difficult to keep them from causing themselves great harm. One of Juvenile Unit #1's mates spewed on an extension and took downstairs' plug sockets out. Wouldn't advise drinking yourself, in case you end up having to taxi some of them back. I enjoy Juvenile Unit #1/#2 Pap. Good Work. A colleague in our Stockholm office refers to her 2 daughters as Shortie 1 & Shortie 2, which also amuses me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trousers Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 McBusted at the BIC in May. Say no more... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halo Stickman Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 I speak from recent experience. Most people are alright, but with some, it's a lot like playing Lemmings. Very difficult to keep them from causing themselves great harm. One of Juvenile Unit #1's mates spewed on an extension and took downstairs' plug sockets out. Wouldn't advise drinking yourself, in case you end up having to taxi some of them back. Yeah, I couldn’t believe the amount of alcohol consumed at my son’s 18th – and that was just the pre-loading at our house, before they went to the club we hired. The girls were the heaviest drinkers. Mrs Stickman and I found the whole experience pretty stressful to be honest, and we didn’t even go to the club! Goodness only knows what went on there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chez Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 McBusted at the BIC in May. Say no more... I think you get awarded an MBE for attending those. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KelvinsRightGlove Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 McBusted at the BIC in May. Say no more... Christ, you are a good man. Mum got off easy with me, took me to Limp Bizkit for my 12th birthday, then Greenday with a mate a year or so later. Still go to gigs together now, though luckily we have pretty similar taste. Got her Arcade Fire tickets for xmas, she was made up. Yes my mum is cooler than me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bearsy Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 I enjoy Juvenile Unit #1/#2 Pap. Good Work. my mum calls me Rhythm Method + my brother Pull-Out Method Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KelvinsRightGlove Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 my mum calls me Rhythm Method + my brother Pull-Out Method Is your mum cooler than you too Bear? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bearsy Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 shut up kelvin my mum is not slack! She just has "latex allergy" like me. You can ask anyone! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KelvinsRightGlove Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 shut up kelvin my mum is not slack! She just has "latex allergy" like me. You can ask anyone! I can confirm she does have a latex allergy. ...crabs too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 My son is 40 and my daughter is 37 and they have seven children between them. We are still bailing them out at all times of the day and night. That's what mums and dads are for. I came upon this quote some time ago and I still can't find who first said it: "By the time I realised that my dad was right I had a son telling me that I was wrong" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 my mum calls me Rhythm Method + my brother Pull-Out Method Victoria and David Beckham named their son Brooklyn after the place where he was conceived. At least that's what my neighbour Back Of A Ford Cortina Johnson tells me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Window Cleaner Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 shut up kelvin my mum is not slack! She just has "latex allergy" like me. You can ask anyone! sheep gut too ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
View From The Top Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 1D previously and Katie Perry to come. Thankfully the lad loves football, cricket and the same music as me so I get to retain my sanity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halo Stickman Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 Took my son and his mate to see Kings of Leon at Plymouth Pavilions. Mrs Stickman and I stood at the back and watched a succession of people withdrawing from the seething mass in front of us with bloody noses and other such injuries. Mrs Stickman then got it into her head that our son was probably being trampled to death in the mosh-pit, and that I would have to go and rescue him, so I dutifully fought my way through the crowd and into the mosh-pit. It was like a scene from Dante’s inferno in there, I’d never been in the midst of so many writhing, sweaty, semi-naked bodies before. Sadly, the vast majority of them were men, and, weirdly, quite a few of them were my age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buctootim Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 On Sunday am going to the Le Corsaire, ballet in London at my 9 nine year old daughters request - which will be odd since Ive never seen the ballet or opera before. To gain quiet acceptance we haven't mentioned the dancing to my son, just "its a show about pirates". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LGTL Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 I pray to god every single day that I have boys Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
View From The Top Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 I pray to god every single day that I have boys It's not all bad. My youngest daughter is going to SMS tomorrow and as I type this they are playing cricket. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 It's not all bad. My youngest daughter is going to SMS tomorrow and as I type this they are playing cricket. My daughter was mad keen on Saints and would still go if she didn't live 100 miles away with three small children. She used to come to all the away games with me as well. Happy days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clapham Saint Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 1D previously and Katie Perry to come. Thankfully the lad loves football, cricket and the same music as me so I get to retain my sanity. :scared: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kingsland Red Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 Blink 182 concert at Wembley Arena; queueing for hours at The Dell every Saturday morning for tickets for some game or another as we never got much nearer the top of the season ticket waiting list; or bidding for a tele tubby at an infant school fete . Now at 20 and 23 their nicknames are no longer appropriate ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperMikey Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 I'll be taking one for the team later this year. Its my eldest 18th birthday, and she wants a party. I can imagine a bar/club/whatever full of 18 year old girls would be absolute hell, but I suppose someone has to do it. If you want to take the night off, i'll keep an eye on proceedings for a small fee. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BadgerBadger Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 My son is 40 and my daughter is 37 and they have seven children between them. We are still bailing them out at all times of the day and night. That's what mums and dads are for. I came upon this quote some time ago and I still can't find who first said it: "By the time I realised that my dad was right I had a son telling me that I was wrong" Superb quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dronskisaint Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 McBusted at the BIC in May. Say no more... I see your McBusted and raise you one Hearsay... I'm going to take one of my pills now! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Duckhunter Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 My daughter used to get really bad asthma, and the steroids made her put on a bit of chunk. She has 3 brothers all skinny as rakes , a mum with a decent figure and a dad whose slightly portly shape is down to lifestyle choices. So basically, she was the odd one out and with the others being very sporty it was starting to upset her. About 3 years ago, the dog nonsense started " can I have a dog" , no. " can I have a dog" no, repeat daily, over and over. I explained she couldn't have a dog, cause 1 she's asthmatic and 2 they're a pain in the rear. She then changed her approach . Evidently, they're are things called hypoallergenic dogs, that dont shed fur, "can I have one of those". No. My mum and dad used to get me to walk their dogs, pain in the butt, no way. She then broke my heart as she said very quietly " If I had a dog daddy, id have to walk it every day and it will help me lose some weight" . How can I turn down a 10 year old daughter ,holding that over me? So fast forward 3 years and you'll see how I took one for the team. As the doctor informed us it could, the asthma is so much better, she doesn't need steroids, she now a slim , beautiful 13 year old (going on 17). Of course you can count on the fingers of one hand the number of walks she's given the dog. So my hit for the team is walking a ****ing chocolate brown poodle every day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saint in Paradise Posted 10 January, 2014 Share Posted 10 January, 2014 ^^^^^ Pleased for the young lady as asthma is a real bas*ard at any age. ( I know you will understand but some on here might not ) Another really nasty one is C.O.P.D. so everyone Don't start smoking or give it up Now! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TopGun Posted 11 January, 2014 Share Posted 11 January, 2014 My 72 year old mum is hassling me to get tickets so that she and I can see the Eagles perform in Manchester later this year. IMO that's one for the team too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Duckhunter Posted 11 January, 2014 Share Posted 11 January, 2014 ^^^^^ Pleased for the young lady as asthma is a real bas*ard at any age. ( I know you will understand but some on here might not ) Another really nasty one is C.O.P.D. so everyone Don't start smoking or give it up Now! She's so much better now, still has a brown inhaler for bed and a blue for everyday use, but doesn't need the courses of steroids she used to. Sad.thing was she was an amazing swimmer, at 2 she could swim around without arm bands, dive in, anything, just no fear at all. But her wet hair and the cold seemed to go stright to her chest and she'd be coughing all night, then up docs again. To be fair, I moan and complain about the dog, but he's great really. He is a great pub dog, highly intelligent, people take the **** out of poodles , but he's no trouble at all. I guess its not really taking one for the team, but I do feel a twt if I see a mate when im walking him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CHAPEL END CHARLIE Posted 11 January, 2014 Share Posted 11 January, 2014 I asked littleun yesterday "you don't really want to go and see Saints v Yeovil do you?" in the hope that he might show some mercy on his poor Godfather and his battered bank account. I'll leave it to you to guess what answer I got from this Lambert worshiping little monster. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatch Posted 11 January, 2014 Share Posted 11 January, 2014 ah, I also took one of mine to Gunwharf the other week. Pushing the boundaries a little that one was. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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