kyle04 Posted 30 November, 2020 Share Posted 30 November, 2020 People who either shit themselves or masturbate on public transport. There really is no need for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manuel Posted 30 November, 2020 Share Posted 30 November, 2020 1 minute ago, kyle04 said: People who either shit themselves or masturbate on public transport. There really is no need for it. Unless experiencing a sexual emergency. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fan The Flames Posted 30 November, 2020 Share Posted 30 November, 2020 People in the dominant lane of two merging lanes who get arsy when you merge in front of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 30 November, 2020 Share Posted 30 November, 2020 (edited) 29 minutes ago, Fan The Flames said: People in the dominant lane of two merging lanes who get arsy when you merge in front of them. If you were doing it right they wouldn’t get annoyed Edited 30 November, 2020 by Whitey Grandad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badgerx16 Posted 30 November, 2020 Share Posted 30 November, 2020 (edited) Christmas themed TV adverts that are narrated in weak primary school rhyme. Edited 30 November, 2020 by badgerx16 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fan The Flames Posted 30 November, 2020 Share Posted 30 November, 2020 8 minutes ago, Whitey Grandad said: If you were doing it right they wouldn’t get annoyed How can you not do it right? Surely the car furthest forward merges first and that's it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 30 November, 2020 Share Posted 30 November, 2020 (edited) 56 minutes ago, Fan The Flames said: How can you not do it right? Surely the car furthest forward merges first and that's it. I’m afraid not. If the traffic with priority has to adjust to you then you’re forcing your way in. You may get lucky and have someone give way to you but you should adjust your speed to match the traffic on your right and join when appropriate. Highway Code (259) Edited 30 November, 2020 by Whitey Grandad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Kraken Posted 30 November, 2020 Share Posted 30 November, 2020 People on the M27 (50 mph limit with average speed cameras) who have no ability to regulate their speed. Slow down to 45, ok I’ll overtake you. Oh, you’ve speeded up to 55, I’ll pull back in behind you. Oh I see, you’ve slowed down to 45 again, great. Rinse and repeat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 30 November, 2020 Share Posted 30 November, 2020 2 hours ago, The Kraken said: People on the M27 (50 mph limit with average speed cameras) who have no ability to regulate their speed. Slow down to 45, ok I’ll overtake you. Oh, you’ve speeded up to 55, I’ll pull back in behind you. Oh I see, you’ve slowed down to 45 again, great. Rinse and repeat. Yes, that really is the pits. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buctootim Posted 1 December, 2020 Share Posted 1 December, 2020 8 hours ago, kyle04 said: People who either shit themselves or masturbate on public transport. There really is no need for it. British Airways first class isnt what it used to be Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fan The Flames Posted 1 December, 2020 Share Posted 1 December, 2020 9 hours ago, Whitey Grandad said: I’m afraid not. If the traffic with priority has to adjust to you then you’re forcing your way in. You may get lucky and have someone give way to you but you should adjust your speed to match the traffic on your right and join when appropriate. Highway Code (259) We are talking about different things. I have a couple in my area, a two lane road into one and two lanes into one after a set of traffic lights. Neither have priority and at rush hour both lanes are full and slow moving so merging should be simple, one car from each lane at a time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WellingtonSaint Posted 1 December, 2020 Share Posted 1 December, 2020 "Merge like a zip". Simple in theory, impossible in practice, especially in my neck of the woods. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rallyboy Posted 1 December, 2020 Share Posted 1 December, 2020 When putting on a shoe, one of the laces nips in under your foot. I don't even know how they do it. Sneaky bastards. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LGTL Posted 1 December, 2020 Share Posted 1 December, 2020 Really busy people at work who are always rushing around everywhere panicking, yet don't get anything done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lighthouse Posted 1 December, 2020 Share Posted 1 December, 2020 7 hours ago, buctootim said: British Airways first class isnt what it used to be I have a friend who is cabin crew for a notable Middle Eastern airline. She’s blonde, quite attractive and on one particular flight to Pakistan a gentleman, upon seeing her, began ‘enjoying himself’ right there in his seat. Faeces on the seats and floor isn’t entirely uncommon either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 1 December, 2020 Share Posted 1 December, 2020 4 hours ago, Fan The Flames said: We are talking about different things. I have a couple in my area, a two lane road into one and two lanes into one after a set of traffic lights. Neither have priority and at rush hour both lanes are full and slow moving so merging should be simple, one car from each lane at a time. Ok, fairy muff. I think the problem in these instances is that the lane markings are biased to one side. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 1 December, 2020 Share Posted 1 December, 2020 38 minutes ago, LGTL said: Really busy people at work who are always rushing around everywhere panicking, yet don't get anything done. Never confuse activity with action. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whelk Posted 1 December, 2020 Author Share Posted 1 December, 2020 People talking about the Highway Code Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whelk Posted 1 December, 2020 Author Share Posted 1 December, 2020 Getting rebuked for knocking one out on a bus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rallyboy Posted 1 December, 2020 Share Posted 1 December, 2020 People watching porn with the volume up while you're trying to shit on the bus. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whelk Posted 9 December, 2020 Author Share Posted 9 December, 2020 News stories that are the same at the end of the day as the start of the day 90% of South Tiday Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raging Bull Posted 9 December, 2020 Share Posted 9 December, 2020 Boomers Its never their fault whilst the generations below them pick up the tab. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 9 December, 2020 Share Posted 9 December, 2020 34 minutes ago, Raging Bull said: Boomers Its never their fault whilst the generations below them pick up the tab. You don’t have a clue about what life was like then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 11 December, 2020 Share Posted 11 December, 2020 the amount of people who bullsh1t about their lives. If i had a pound for the amount of people ive met who but for an injury would have been a pro footballer/golfer/rugby player. F*ck me there are thousands of people out there on premier league clubs books who did their knee right at the time when decisions were being made about signing them on pro deals. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kyle04 Posted 11 December, 2020 Share Posted 11 December, 2020 On 01/12/2020 at 19:05, rallyboy said: People watching porn with the volume up while you're trying to shit on the bus. The height of ignorance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SNSUN Posted 14 December, 2020 Share Posted 14 December, 2020 The LIDL Christmas advert. Not sure why, just grates. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 14 December, 2020 Share Posted 14 December, 2020 1 hour ago, SNSUN said: The LIDL Christmas advert. Not sure why, just grates. Well, every Lidl helps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toadhall Saint Posted 15 December, 2020 Share Posted 15 December, 2020 Aftershave adverts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lighthouse Posted 21 December, 2020 Share Posted 21 December, 2020 Since we’re doing adverts: Tesco - why you’d pick Fearne Cotton to do a voiceover when she’s the most gormless sounding halfwit out there, I’ve no idea. That ‘we are veggies’ song. Christ alive... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whelk Posted 21 December, 2020 Author Share Posted 21 December, 2020 On 15/12/2020 at 22:33, Toadhall Saint said: Aftershave adverts The Chanel advert is superb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weston Super Saint Posted 21 December, 2020 Share Posted 21 December, 2020 Motorway matrix boards that show "40 - surface water". It's just a bit of rain. If you can't drive in the rain you really shouldn't be driving in the UK! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weston Super Saint Posted 21 December, 2020 Share Posted 21 December, 2020 Mongs driving at 40 on the motorway because it's raining! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badgerx16 Posted 21 December, 2020 Share Posted 21 December, 2020 24 minutes ago, Weston Super Saint said: Mongs driving at 40 on the motorway because it's raining! So that would be mongs following the Highways Agency advice ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uncle Albert Posted 21 December, 2020 Share Posted 21 December, 2020 Kevin the bloody carrot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weston Super Saint Posted 21 December, 2020 Share Posted 21 December, 2020 2 hours ago, badgerx16 said: So that would be mongs following the Highways Agency advice ? Yes, those are the ones, maybe you know them? The signs are 'advisory' and I don't have an issue with the mongs following them in the inside lane, but when they spread out across all lanes, that's the frustration - especially when the rain stopped ten minutes ago and the road is now just a bit 'damp'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manuel Posted 21 December, 2020 Share Posted 21 December, 2020 I ordered a pair of those bosch aerotwin wipers today because I struggled with visibility whilst driving the better half's car. I had them on my old motor. Much better... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whelk Posted 22 December, 2020 Author Share Posted 22 December, 2020 Clicking on a link t9 a news story when it is a timeline of different stories, comments and Tweets. What sort of cunt wants to read their news like this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benjii Posted 22 December, 2020 Share Posted 22 December, 2020 People who begin answers with, "Listen,....". Blair seemed to start this and now loads of people do it. Rude, arrogant, aloof, slightly sinister, cuntish way to converse. So, people who begin sentences with, "So", as well. Jelly-brained morons. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whelk Posted 22 December, 2020 Author Share Posted 22 December, 2020 (edited) 1 hour ago, benjii said: People who begin answers with, "Listen,....". Blair seemed to start this and now loads of people do it. Rude, arrogant, aloof, slightly sinister, cuntish way to converse. So, people who begin sentences with, "So", as well. Jelly-brained morons. You can see with so many politician interviews now that they use more assertive language than previously. Also ‘let’s be clear’ Edited 22 December, 2020 by whelk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badgerx16 Posted 22 December, 2020 Share Posted 22 December, 2020 1 hour ago, whelk said: You can see with so many politician interviews now that they use more assertive language than previously. Also ‘let’s be clear’ A sure sign they are about to talk bollocks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Cat Posted 22 December, 2020 Share Posted 22 December, 2020 "Are you free for a Teams chat about this?" No, just fucking email me like you used to and I'll get around to it when I have time. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whelk Posted 22 December, 2020 Author Share Posted 22 December, 2020 51 minutes ago, The Cat said: "Are you free for a Teams chat about this?" No, just fucking email me like you used to and I'll get around to it when I have time. Also people who just say hi or hello on Teams and don’t type anything until they get a response back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lighthouse Posted 22 December, 2020 Share Posted 22 December, 2020 People who say they’re, "ashamed to be from the UK," because of Brexit. Get a f**king grip, drama queens. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lighthouse Posted 31 December, 2020 Share Posted 31 December, 2020 Watching Jurassic Park, a film I love, and the 100ft cliff which magically appears in the space where the T-Rex just ate the goat annoys me every time. It kills an iconic scene stone dead. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whelk Posted 26 January, 2021 Author Share Posted 26 January, 2021 Commentators who say ‘that’s good refereeing’ when all the ref has done is ‘played on’ like it is some skill to see a foul and realise team fouled have the ball so you don’t whistle immediately. Great skill that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fan The Flames Posted 4 February, 2021 Share Posted 4 February, 2021 People doing a zoom meeting by holding their phone, so the whole meeting their head is swaying and bobbing about the screen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fan The Flames Posted 4 February, 2021 Share Posted 4 February, 2021 On 26/01/2021 at 19:54, whelk said: Commentators who say ‘that’s good refereeing’ when all the ref has done is ‘played on’ like it is some skill to see a foul and realise team fouled have the ball so you don’t whistle immediately. Great skill that The other one is where commentors (normally the ex footballer pundit) say 'that was intelligent play', where a player stops a quick counter attack by fouling the opposition, it is particularly said when the defence would be overloaded. Is it really that intelligent to spot that you are out numbered or in a risky position. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stknowle Posted 7 February, 2021 Share Posted 7 February, 2021 (edited) People who use the initial of their 2nd name in their signatures. Jack P Shepherd. Edited 7 February, 2021 by stknowle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Cat Posted 7 February, 2021 Share Posted 7 February, 2021 3 hours ago, stknowle said: People who use the initial of their 2nd name in their signatures. Jack P Shepherd. This, and also people who list qualifications in their email signature. It's a BA Hons (probably a 2:2) for God's sake. Everyone has one and nobody cares. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 7 February, 2021 Share Posted 7 February, 2021 Wildlife programs that insist on giving wild animals human Christian names. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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